Somehow I Keep Throwing Down Jokers

You see your opponents.
Always try to keep that game face on.
They can read any sudden weakness.
You have all the cards babe,
so hit em where it hurts.
Just make sure you throw the right ones out on the table.
You see all that bounty on that table?
That can be yours.
Well now it your turn…
So, which one will you throw out to keep you in the game?

The dating world can be like a game of poker.
It takes some good card plays and keen observation to win.
It’s just… well, you been losing each time you sit on at that table.
Another game; another loss.
Your poker face has now diminished,
so now I got to ask…

Are you tired of playing?

My super-duper late ass saw Think Like A Man last night and I have to admit,
I had my reservations.
Steve Harvey giving love advice?
I like my Steve Harvey where I can see him: telling jokes or hosting a game show.
But, a book? Then a movie? What?
I was soooooooo ready for a giant coon fest.
But…

MOVIE IS THE SHIT.

It was right up my alley and it dealt with a lot of topics I could definitely relate with.
Shit, a ton of topics that we spoke about on here.
I definitely saw myself in my home girls, Tariji and Meagan, characters.
I also saw myself in Michael Ealy and Terrance J’s pants.
But that is whole nother story.

The movie actually made me want to start dating again.
I miss going out on dates,
meeting ratchet ass Wolves (and niggas) and talking about them,
and going through the motions.

Is he going to call?
Will he text?
Oh shit, he wants to chill again!
… but, at my crib?
Watch a movie?
WHAT?
Is he crazy?
UGH!

or my favorite:

Damn his body looks good.
No pictures though.
Let me send him a message.
Oh shit he responded.
Talk for a minute.
Okay, let’ meet.
So we meet…
…and I didn’t realize Caesar from Planet of the Apes knew how to use a computer?

Honestly, that is what made me lose all interest in dating and chat sites in the first place.
I was tired of the same ol stories and the typical results.

Meet.
“Oh you cute as hell.”
“Yeah, you cute too.”
Fuck stupid.

Thanks For the dick.
Thanks for the ass.
Okay, bye!

YOU KNOW A FOX WANTS MORE.
I stepped away for a year and learned a few tricks.
I was losing bad at the table last couple times I played.
My judgement was off and I was falling for silly words.
I was one of those people who lost everything at the casino and slept at the slot machines.
They were hoping they put their last bit of change in to win something.
This go round though, I think I’m ready to put my bid back in.

But, are you tired of dating though?
I mean, this is a serious question.
I feel like the odds of meeting a real Wolf is impossible these days.
Why should he take me seriously,
when some big booty Jackal with no ceilings is willing to do what I won’t?
Are they really rules in dating?
Can a book like “Think Like A Man” really direct us to dating gold?
Or, is it really just a combo of luck, the right cards, and… well hell, luck?
I had to ask…

How do you really ACE dating?

Author: jamari fox

the fox invited to the blogging table.

5 thoughts on “Somehow I Keep Throwing Down Jokers

  1. It’s a lot going on in this post today; the following advice is just in general, yall gonna continue to do what the fuck yall wanna do.

    First off, you don’t get dating advice from old tired ass Steve Harvey. You ask that dude about suits and thread counts and not much else. Secondly, figure out if you are dating material. If you don’t think you are worth anything why should he or anyone else for that matter? You will not meet the wolf of your dreams through tumblr, Facebook, or any other wretched online site. Anything substantial will occur face-to-face. When you actually do meet him face-to-face, do not compare this real man to your fantasy man in your head. Get to know him and allow him the chance to know you. Also know his middle name and social security number before you fuck with him. His cellphone company should not have more information about him than you do. Stop telling wolves you love them after just meeting–this bullshit is tired and desperate–have a life so you can share it with his. Finally, stop pining away, lurking in the shadows, rolling in the deep, for men who will never have anything to do with you…ever AND NEVER put dick on a pedestal!

    The key to dating is finding out what works for you–figuring out your wants and needs and areas of compromise. If what you’ve been doing ain’t working then STOP doing that bullshit and get yourself together.

  2. Dating comes with rules : In 2012 these rules have been refined, it’s like a long mathemical forumale youvderice this complex equation and arrive at a simple formula to follow:

    I won’t date average looking men . Period ( average men come with a LOT of emotional baggage sometimes PROPERLY masked. they act and CLAIM to be soo confident in who they are YET can’t stop commenting on the ex and some kid… Right. They act deluded and think everrrrrryone wants them… Uhhh.. They act so slow and tend to be overly dramatic even when so called masculine . A lot overly work out on the gym, I understand the logic behind that however u are still average . To keep an average looking guy on lock , he must ALWAYS feel the inner urge to always chase, please and crave for you. Sadly they actually want this regardless of what he SAYS. Dare make the relationship a 50/50 partnership and watch him move on to the next)

    If he talks in sooo much slang….next. Even I, don’t speak that much slang damn I mash it out and separate times for colloquials . I’ve met men STRAIGHT OuT of prison for some veryyy grievous acts and these men are what this site will call super baller top notch wolves . Yet they are very charismatic and suave with their words they use words like hello to women and once I got this heart throbbing panty soaking ( no homo) message from one. His finesse and English contrasting his deadly thug person was just sooo hot. So a guy from a chat site that uses nothing but Ay, YO , shit my Nigga etc is a bum, a phoney , a wannabe and most likely a a secret punk ass bitch . 2012 Boone talks like that, not even rappers. Straight dudes DONt either so i don’t know where gay dudes picked that up from . Experiment for yourself real thug hood whatever u wanna call it masculine men are masters of exressing themselves conductor regardless of the level of education

    If you instagram all your pics – negative . Youre trying so hard to be something you’re not bs you’ll present yourself as something you’re not too. No time to dig through your. Fa
    fake layers.

    Duck lips ass shots and open dick pics – negative. Your only means of getting attention to you is sexual attraction

    Excesive verbiage in profile – attention whore and probably wants me to believe he’s intelligent intellectual or enlightened . No interest if u r it should shine through

    U find n average dude sexy – means u share a taste for average things – not my speed

  3. well its not as hard as people make it its not a “mathemical forumale” thinking like that well get you nowhere

  4. I believe what Iceededppl said was the best advice that anyone can take, however like numbaone said it can occur online also. I like to go with the 3 out of 5 rule. Which means if a person has 3 or more out of the five things your are sincerely looking for in a guy then give him a chance, but take your time, communicate and interpret what being spoken, done and said but just that. The 90 days rule is good, but challenge yourself and them with the 365 day rule and see what happens. You will always see the true image of any man after a year.

"off topic", trolling, and other nonsense gets sent to my spam folder. other than that, play nice and let's discuss!