The Art of the Chase

to pursue in order to seize, overtake.

When we are attracted to someone, we go after it.
The pleasure of the hunt and taking down prey.
Men are natural hunters.

In love, the same rules apply but these days it seems more Foxes.
Foxes are doing the hunting…

…and Wolves are just standing still saying, “fuck me stupid“.


Remember when Wolves use to chase?
They made us feel something?
What happened?

Easy: a bunch of easy breezies gave it up too easily and now Wolves just expect the Foxhole from everyone.

I was talking to a Wolf last night and we got onto the topic of chase/catch.
He claims the chase is what makes things interesting.
I said, the chase is interesting but there is a certain way a Wolf chases a Fox that makes it interesting
(or keeps me interested cause I get BORED fast).

He made it seem that in order for him to be interested,
the Fox needs to chase him.


I’m not chasing any man (Devin Thomas, maybe).
Not my style especially if I do not know if he is interested or not.
That is the first disclaimer.

There has to be just enough space and pursuit between both parties.
When a Fox (or Wolf) is doing way to much, I call it 80/20.
You are giving more on the scale than the other person is contributing.
Therefore: you are wasting your time.

A prospect cannot vanish for 2 weeks with no phone calls/no texts/no face time, and then suddenly re-appear to resume where he left off.
He also cannot stop replying in mid-text/phone convo and then re-appear like he is a magician at a Vegas strip show.
That is flaky behavior and it is already forewarning as what is to come if you date his Houdini “now you see me/now you don’t” ass.

I always said the best way to chase has a couple ingredients.

Just the amount of right space.
A couple scoops of flirting.
A dash of quality time.
And a ounce of aggression.

Anything other than that is doing way too much or way too little.
Foxes, we got to do better with the meat.


Author: jamari fox

the fox invited to the blogging table.

6 thoughts on “The Art of the Chase”

  1. Its still crazy to me how alike we are. I’ve blogged about as well as been discussing this with my friends for the past few weeks like… what the FUCK is going on? I have to now do the approaching? I refuse to chase any man because honestly, that’s not in my nature. I’m not going to pick you up on a date. Won’t be paying for it either. I understand my role as the submissive one and i play it well. Now you’re telling me i have to do both? The men who usually do chase are never really the ones i want and it isn’t about something petty like ‘oh he isn’t tall enough.’ Generally, I’m not attracted to them physically. Not even a little bit. I have to show these guys to my friends just to make sure I’m not crazy (‘Yeah, he’s not cute but at least try and get a free meal’). So I’m learning now that yes, men want you to do the chasing as well as how much intensity they’d like you to do it at. To me it all still stems from this culture of them wanting to expend as little energy as possible and not putting both feet in.

    1. I agree. Maybe I am of a different breed. Yes, I’ll let you know I’m feeling you and I’m interested. No, I will not be blowing up your phone and texting you wild crazy – and I do not know where we stand. It is almost like, we have to do the chasing in order to hook, line, and sinker a dude of standards. But we got these hoes on Xtube, spreading cheeks, and they get the prize.

      What gives?

      1. It’s a mystery to rival the pyramids?? I have my theories though as you can tell. The ones on the internet are getting the sex, that’s often the easist thing to get. And he’s blowing up their phone trying to spend time with them, to get MORE sex. I doubt there’s any real substance there. But are many of us willing to settle for that as opposed to being alone? Yes. As a result it only makes more difficult. Everyday i move closer and closer to the idea that finding someone who not only likes you but is also interested in you exclusively is like winning the lottery. But I don’t want to believe it.

        Now, how exactly do you go about telling a guy you meet in person that you’re interested? Are you pretty straight forward and upfront about it?

  2. I feel like you can meet someone but your energy has to shine so bright and almost make you a dream come to life.

    I’ll explain…

    There are so many hoes out here running around that you have to stand out and be the opposite. It is easy to get sex. People are giving it up so easily, they end up having all the wear and tear on the booty. So when you meet the dude of your dream, your ass is like quicksand.

    When you are interested in a dude, I feel being his boy is the best approach. Some of the longest lasting relationships is with people who started out as friends. Instead of putting so much weight on the “relationship” aspect, move slow and be his friend.

    1. Be friends first, yes that’s a pretty common notion. Take it slow so that foundations are to be built and what not. It’s all very easy to say but how does one reach that point? I notice i never seem to find many practical and real life ways of getting there. Does one have to pretend to not be interested in a relationship in order to get to know them or are we upfront about what we are looking for? How often do we get stuck in that limbo between friends and boyfriends where he ends up wanting and getting all the emotional and physical stuff without any of the commitment?

      1. Well all men are different so you have to gauge what direction your potential is coming from. Some are easy to train, while others are just so stupid that they can’t get “it”.

        I say go with the flow and drop hints subtle. Seems when you tell a dude you are interested, all you see is the smoke from him running to the hills.

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