he doesn’t want to go on the trip because he thinks a gay man will give him hiv by association

we were cool af or so i thought.
he would come to me for advice and want to chill.
straight.
platonic.
it wasn’t until a vixen hinted i might be gay that it all changed.
suddenly,
it went from us being close to him avoiding me.
he wanted to save his reputation than our friendship.

it hurt because i thought he was my friend.

true story.
that ( x tyler lepley entry ) sort of triggered me.
i’ve lost straight “friends” over rumors of my sexuality.
once someone does a fox hunt on me…


some males don’t want to be guilty by association.
that’s a hurt that many gay males know all too well.
earlier today,
i got a call from scavenger asking me this question:

“Why do people think only gay people are the ones with HIV?”

it was a very “huh?” question,
but i let him know many straights are catching diseases out here too.
he went on to tell me how his home-wolf/jackal feels some kind of way about gay males…

on an upcoming group trip to another country,
where they’ll be plenty of pussy in abundance,
a friend of scavenger’s bailed because according to him:

“Why ya’ll invite some gay men on this trip?”

now i’m not going on this trip,
but a fox was invited by scavenger’s girl.

“Why you got his number?”
“Nah I don’t feel comfortable with a gay man going.”
“What if he got HIV?”

i was absolutely confused.
scavenger and his other home-wolf stuck up for the fox,
but it fell on deaf ears.
he.
ain’t.
going.
and they’ll just have to deal.
scavenger is hurt by his friend’s ignorance:

A) he tends to live in the clouds at times
B) he never experienced that before

welcome to being friends with someone gay in a world where people are ignorant.

i am not a pedophile,
 rapist,
nor demon.
there is no:

“They are gonna take me into an alley and rape me!!!!”

my little ass ain’t even about that life.
a majority of gay males aren’t either.
we tend to be minding our business.

i treat everyone with respect and i know boundaries.
standing next to me or being my friend doesn’t mean someone is gay or bi.

His dick in my mouth or ass means he is gay or bi

i keep a healthy distance from all males unless you show me you allow me into your space.
period.
i don’t feel comfortable around males i don’t know as they were often my bullies.
it’s hurtful when you are treated like a leper because you are same-sex attracted,
but that is what comes with this life.
only the strong survive.

lowkey: shout out to all the straight males who rocked with me even though i’m gay.
you are a blessing.

Author: jamari fox

the fox invited to the blogging table.

15 thoughts on “he doesn’t want to go on the trip because he thinks a gay man will give him hiv by association

  1. This kind of cracks me up. This is kind of what happens in the black community. Some blacks want acceptance so bad from the white community, that they either blatantly make it clear that they are like the “other” black or they passively accept any “pass” given to them by white people for simply “not being like those others.” Some gays operate like this as well: looking for acceptance from the mainstream (straight) community under the idea of “see! I’m not like those other gays!” 🤣😂 Meanwhile the straights don’t differentiate; (to them) all gays are the SAME! They all are fem, whores, sassy, fashionable, sexual deviants, Bottoms, attracted to any and all straight men, and HIV positive. We’d be a lot less butt hurt if we wouldn’t hold on for the need to be accepted and realize the difference between that and tolerance (up to a point). Because, remember, tolerance doesn’t include you being able to share your man-on-man date last night or detail your sexual experiences with your straight homies. That’s too gay! 🤷🏽‍♂️😂🤣

    1. EDIT::: Some blacks want acceptance so bad from the white community, that they either blatantly make it clear that they are NOT like the “other” black or they passively accept any “pass” given to them by white people for simply “not being like those others.”

  2. I don’t know if any of these people are black but black women are disproportionately affected by HIV.We make of 13% of U.S.female population but in 2018 accounted for 58% of HIV diagnosis among women.

    So he should be more concerned with contracting HIV from a woman he may have sex with then a gay man who he may sit next to at dinner or by the pool.Unless,of course, he’s planning on engaging in a sex act or sharing a needle with the gay guy.

  3. Everybody seems to be going on trips everywhere in this pandemic lol. Anyway, adults can be juvenile at times because not wanting to be around someone gay because you are worried others might think you are gay is what I’ve seen kids do. Grow a pair and find some security in yourself so you won’t be so bothered by gay men and what others think of you. The ignorance is pretty mind blowing too.

  4. Personally I don’t get why gay people seek so much validation from straight folks. I am who I am and if my sexuality bothers you and you can’t see beyond that to see the great person I am then adios!!! Life is too short to try to keep others comfortable at your own peril. People try too hard to justify straight men’s shitty behaviour towards gay men. If you are living in the West and have the means, surround yourself with people who celebrate you not tolerate you. As gay men , it’s time we take accountability for this. Too often I hear stories about ‘its just that he’s uncomfortable with my sexuality but other than that he’s a great guy’. The way I cut the crap and simplify that nonsense is by thinking would I say the same about a woman beater with an amazing personality?
    Whoever is reading this and is in that situation, respect yourself!

  5. 1 – Going on trips during the pandemic is selfish and foolish. Fuck out of here with the “iM GrOWn” mess. Ventilators ain’t cute. Watch them get sick then hit up Facebook with a GoFundMe… nope! Should’ve saved that trip money in case of emergency.

    2 – My neighbor is wheelchair bound with a broken leg…

    A broken leg that she’s had since I was a kid.

    I’m in my 30s.

    Her leg won’t heal because she has AIDS.

    Yes.

    My heterosexual, female, cis gendered, widowed, mother-of-three neighbor has AIDS.

    She’s had it since the 1980s and she got it using IV drugs with her deceased husband, the father of her children.

    3 – …

  6. This story is so bizarre, but beyond traveling during a pandemic (WTH?), let the homophobe be the one to stay at home. That’s his/their loss. He/they sounds like he/they have serious psychological issues, and the last thing you want to be doing is traveling anywhere, let alone outside the US, with a nutcase.

    In terms of straight Black men, any ones I’d be traveling with would know upfront I’m a gay man. No fronting. If you have a problem with gay people, we’re not hanging and we surely ain’t hopping on a plane to wherever together unless it’s for work and we absolutely have to travel together.

  7. I can’t do straight men. Not that I ever tried but the few “friendships” I did have with em, they were all annoyingly insecure about being seen as gay. One of em recently told me he couldn’t remember my birthday because straight men don’t do that and had the nerve to tell me chill when I checked his dumbass. 😒

  8. The thing to know is that most straight men are pack animals with group think mentality. Their worst and greatest fear is to be isolated and ex communicated from the pack. If you look closely, every pack has an alpha (leader), a beta (second in command), and so on so forth all the way down to the “bottom” of the group, the one who takes the most jokes, is happy to sit in the back seat, and do all the grunt work for the pack. The reward? The omega still gets to be apart of a pack. Despite their position, they are often the fiercest and most loyal.

    Unfortunately, most gay men have never had a pack and are quite often … loners. Often from a young age. Not understand the pack and the group acceptance/love of a pack is foreign and strange to them. (Sidenote: there is something to be said about the reformation of the pack by street Houses and House Mothers, etc)

    If you want to know if your straight guy friend will accept your gay ass as a friend, you need look no further than the alpha in his pack. If his alpha is cool with it, then so will he be. But if his alpha isn’t cool with it, he risks losing his pack. And most likely he aint giving up his pack for you.

    Your welcome. I’ve just unlocked a part of the universe for you.

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