gay males lie just as good as straight males

i said this year i was gonna do more reading.
i want to read more stories,
especially scary shit.
i think i’m pretty done with self-help books tbh.
i posted ^that picture during my IG stories a few weeks ago and…

“You have to read that book!
I read it during the pandemic and it changed my life!” – A Foxholer.

the book is called “all about love (new visions)” by bell hooks.
after a 2 week hold at the digital library,
i finally got it.
as i was reading the chapter on why men lie,
and how it usually started with many of our childhoods,
i thought of something that i wanted to run by the foxhole.
so read me out…

At young ages,
straight wolves are taught to lie.
they are taught that anything emotional is “soft”.
Even if their parents were understanding of emotions,
they are taught to “mask up” within other young straight wolves.

At young ages,
gay males are taught to lie.
If we showed emotions or do something considered “feminine”,
we learned that it would upset those who raised us.
Even if our parents were understanding,
we had to learn to “fit it” within those in society.
If not,
we would be outcasted,
teased mercilessly,
or killed.

Men and boys.
regardless of sexuality,
are taught to be good liars because that is how we survive and are accepted.
Look at the many liars on social media,
and in politics.

so when i think of heteronormative behavior,
i don’t think of roles or how folks choose to be in relationships.

I think of how gay males have become liars to hide their emotions like our straight counterparts.
Some of us lash out and become our oppressors to those “weaker” than us.
Many of us forgot how we lie about our sexuality to parents and peers.
Don’t even get me started on those who become hyper-sexual to fit in.

Being gay is more than just sex and how you like getting fucked.
It’s more than likes on social media about our bawdies and workout goals.
It’s about the very things that we were told weren’t accepted as masculine.
Being honest is seen as weak and “soft” in society.
So many gays come off as heteronormative because they are trying to look just as masculine and powerful,
or be good liars,
just as the straight wolves do/are.
We just do it in a different way within our community.

…that was stirring in my spirit as i was reading the chapter.
i tried to get it out in a way that would make sense.

Author: jamari fox

the fox invited to the blogging table.

One thought on “gay males lie just as good as straight males”

  1. This is hilarious at best. Now being gay isn’t all about good looks, sex, and thirst? Stop it right now. This body of work ur blog glorifies everything you just spoke against. Let’s be real most of the gurls are thirsty and sex addicts. I remember a while ago you was gushing about how “cute” an alleged “rapist” was… huh. The truth you can’t watch a gay movie, go to a gay website that’s not laced and dripping with sex as if it’s the only thing that consumes. Big dicks, phat asses, cute faces is the brand of the community, so how you gonna act like it’s more to it?

    Humans lie because they don’t want the world to see the real deal. Men and women alike. Some are habitual because they can’t really deal what’s looking them in the face. A lonely end on the road of life. Sorry but I thought I was reading a different blog based on that diatribe. I respect your opinions but let’s keep it real. The gay community is definitely superficial, overly sexual, and filled with tons of folks still in hiding.

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