the one thing king james can’t rule is his hair follicles

the other night,
i had a random dream i was king james assistant.
i don’t remember much of it,
but i know it was innocent.
i’m sure it was because i fell asleep watching him on “ellen”:

his bawdy >>>
he is just tall and massive.
like,
he fills out everywhere.
would we consider him “thick”?
sheesh.
well i know that king james has had some issues with his hair.
over the years,
he has been the source of many jokes and memes.
this is the alleged latest one from a few days ago…

folks be clownin’,
but from experience,
it ain’t an easy thing to accept.
you’d rather hang on to what little you have.
no male wants to know he’s losing his hair,
especially when you’re so young.
no matter your talent,
or how rich you are,
that can really destroy your self esteem.
personally,
i think he is losing his hair due to stress.
the more stressed he gets,
the more you see his hair loss.
like,
imagine being lebron james and labelled as “king”?
he has a lot riding on those giant shoulders…

…so i get it.
if he doesn’t want to rock the full bald look,
i think he might need to cut it real low so it can camouflage.
it’s not like he hasn’t done it before:

he looks better bald.

lowkey: sometimes he has a full head of hair,
and other times,
he has patches.
it’s weird.

Author: jamari fox

the fox invited to the blogging table.

5 thoughts on “the one thing king james can’t rule is his hair follicles

  1. Man, people with those memes SMH. Now, I can’t front A LOT of them are hilarious and in good fun (shady AF too). But, there are some mean ones too that go over limit as well. Now, Lebron is a Deep Chocolate, Lanky yet “Thickish” or Slim-Thick MEAL (Channing could get it too by the way) but he does need to let that hair go. It’s something sexy about a older man who can realize what ain’t workin’ anymore (like hair), and embrace it by letting go. I say it’s best to get in from it, rather than be behind it when it comes to the inevitable. On another note, if I were his assistant in a dream it would lean more to the X-rated side. Let’s just say, his to-do list wouldn’t be the only thing getting “did” (accidentally spills paperwork in his lap…Oops! LOL).

  2. Hair loss is passed on from your mother’s genes. If her father was balding, there is a high likelihood that some or all of her children will eventually suffer from male pattern baldness.

    As for Lebron, hair or no hair, he still does something for me. He’s just so big and phine. Dat booty, dat walk, dat swag… omg

    I just wanna see him getting those cakes destroyed in a Breed It Raw porn scene 🙂

  3. Yeah, there are times his scalp looks completely awful. I understand losing hair can damage self-esteem, but I want to be the most attractive as possible, and his amount of hair loss is a lot. I’d go bald.

  4. Once my shyt starts to disappear..I’m cutting it all off and going fully bald.
    I’m not trying hair growth products, clinics, none of that. It’s a losing battle.

  5. Hair or no hair, I am still trying to figure out when did he become so Handsome and SOOO Fine!! He Slipped up on my!!

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