It Is Hard To Be The One Who Takes The Peen

It must be hell being a Fox, huh?

I’m asking YOU that question, seriously…
So they are saying that in Fox-dom, we are the lowest common denominator.
We tend to fall victim to all the bullshit going on around us.
We can never have real friends because everyone is always catty.
We can never be too feminine because we fit into that “stereotype” hairdresser or gay boyfriend.
Vixens always think we are some Dr. Phil for their own doomed love lives,
or we are an extended bitch on their shopping trips.
When we do meet a decent Wolf, being together for 2 months = 2 years.
We can never meet a decent Wolf because he only wants a relationship with our ass.
And then, we always must enter every room with our butt cheeks first.
As we see ourselves as the perfect Fox,
we get bombarded with images and ideals of what we “should” be or what we aren’t.

So, my fellow Fox…

Isn’t all that shit just… exhausting?

Realistically, I can talk about how “doomed” Foxes are…
and how sad the lifestyle is for us….
And why we need to blah blah blah….
You are tired of it.
I’m tired of it.
I want to talk about how all those things I listed as PAST SHIT WE JUST CLEANED OUT.
Let’s dwell into some things, shall we?


That is not true at all.
Foxes CAN meet/be GREAT friends.
The issue is that we attract ourselves to the WRONG friends.
We open ourselves up to the wrong people and then get upset when they tell our business.
I mean, duh?
My idea of being a friend does not involve talking about the next nigga and what he is doing wrong.
My idea of being a friend does not involve being the center of attention either.
My idea of friendship is loyalty and growth.
We ALL share the spotlight.
There is room for all of us on that stage.
But if you fuck up any of my ideals of friendship then you are DROPPED.
You will NOT talk shit about me behind my back and you WILL be a friend of years; rather than weeks.
I can drop someone and not look back.
It really has never been an issue with me going back to someone who hurt or betrayed me.
So anything less than stellar and you gotta go.


Well, you can go ahead and fit into those boxes.
Frankly, I wouldn’t be comfortable.
I like room to do my own thing.
No way in hell am I going to take on the role of the hairdresser, stylist, or the therapist.
First of all, I can never tell when a Vixen is wearing a weave.
I could care less about their clothes unless they look SEXY AS HELL in it.
And I’m up for giving advice, but I will charge you every session for my services.
Stop giving these Vixens reasons to think you are the stereotype.
Be the change in the world you want to see.
In other words: MAN UP.


Realistically, they aren’t.
Again: those are the STANDARDS set for most.
I am not ultra-feminine and I consider myself a Fox.
And best believe, I like MEN so you better be a MAN if you plan on talking to me.
I’m not hiding or whatever some gay rights group want you to think…
It’s because that isn’t my personality.
I do not find joy in voguing (although if it is happening in front of me, I wont run to the bathroom and cry).
I do not find joy in being catty with a bunch of DUDES.
And lastly, I do not find joy in doing anything a female would more than likely enjoy.
I like being a man and I like fucking one (that is another story).


Yeah, I said it.
We have already come to that conclusion.
Wolves expect these high standards for us,
but as soon as we start pulling out lists and expectations,
they want to bitch up and call us “difficult” or whatever excuse.
You want me to be your fantasy then I need you to be mine.
Ima also need us to grow and compliment each other.
And that cheating thing they are so prone to doing,
I will need that to end since cheating on + Jamari =
your ass replaced by your best friend/cousin who got his act together.
Best believe I keep a 2 week bail out plan.

Just because you take on the role of “Fox” doesn’t mean you are “Bitch”.
And not the good “bitch” either.
The simple one who probably thinks all Wolves are dogs and you look fat in certain jeans.
It just means you take the submissive role.
You do not fall victim to all the other shit that comes with that.
I always believe you train people how to treat you upon first meeting.
So best believe, all the shit happening to you in your life is happening because YOU made it so.
You let anyone (or life) punk you and you will always be it’s bitch.

So take a moment and digest.
Stick your chest out and walk tall.
Be ready to pull that middle finger out.

Realize that YOU rule and everyone should be mentally bowing down to YOUR ideal.
Anyone crosses that line: CHECK THEY ASSES!

It IS fun to be the Fox…
or do you still want to entertain bullshit?

Author: jamari fox

the fox invited to the blogging table.

8 thoughts on “It Is Hard To Be The One Who Takes The Peen”

  1. This fox life is fucking exhausting indeed. I tell fish all the time if they were gay men, they wouldn’t be able to handle it. I still firmly believe that. And of course someone will come on here and say live your life and be yourself and the world will love you too.. Which is… Mostly true but there are other outside factors as well.

    I personally always feel this need to look good. And not really for other foxes (because we size each other up every time we see another one) or a wolf (because they are visual creatures) but mostly for myself. I go to the gym, I dress in form fitting clothes, and I smell good because it helps me get through the day. When I look good I feel better. I keep my fish friends to a minimum because I’m constantly placed into the gay sidekick role. Often times I have to assert myself and let them know that I am on the same level as they are. I have great fox friends who I’ve known for years and have been there for.

    Wolves are frustrating, honestly. Yada yada don’t look for it wait for it to yada yada but even when I do I’m still met with lukewarm attraction and inconsistent behavior on their end. I get a lot of ‘you’re so sexy/ you look good/ etc’ but that’s usually as far as it goes. I bring up wanting them to follow through or wanting to get together outside of a bedroom setting and I’m met with excuses and unavailability. And these are often not the cutest ones. So I question my approach and my standard level and realize there isn’t anything wrong with me. I’m putting myself out there, the least one can do is meet me in the middle. Otherwise, I’m fantasizing about that straight wolf who I know I can’t have because at least he’s consistent.

    So not only is it frustrating just staying afloat in life in general, it’s made even more difficult when dealing with a group who has a lot of extra baggage as well. So we go to the gym so we’ll better like what we see in the mirror. We try to pursue a wolves kinda sorta, afraid to speak up let alone approach at all signals from across the way without scaring him off. We keep moving and try to stay hopeful that one day, it’ll all work itself out.

  2. Can I just say that .gif of Derrick Rose just turned me all the way on. I love an aggressive man.

    As far as the post, I’m fortunate enough to say none of them really apply to me.
    I actually have good friends. We can be extremely mean to one another, but it’s made us tougher. We’re all masculine, so it cuts down on a lot of the extra that usually comes with more feminine men (for whatever reason).

    I’ve never had to deal with the “stereotype” so much because people assume I’m straight and when I tell a Vixen I’m gay, they usually can’t get beyond my manliness to put me into any kind of “girlfriend” role.

    I hollered when I read “NO NEGRO, FUCK YOU,” because it sounds like some shit I’d say when I’m pissed off.

    All in all, I don’t think a life for a fox/hybrid has to be as difficult as we make it.
    Sometimes, I think we over-complicate it.

  3. From a wolf’s perspective, I can see why it’s hard for you foxes. The sterotypes piss me off the most. Just becuase a man is a fox doesn’t mean that he has to play the role of a vixen. A fox doesn’t have to cook me dinner, clean the house, and serve me ass everyday for me to love and care about him. I’m not implying that a house shouldn’t be cleaned or a person should not cook dinner for their mate, but it’s not a requirement, it’a an option.

    1. …A lot of these dudes wanna be taken care of like women so don’t get mad when you relegated to the duties (and stereotypes) of an inferior housewife.

      In any event, after subtracting the conceited, or clingy, or straight loose or psycho foxes there aren’t too many I would talk to on the regular.

      I don’t deal with the “my attitude is shitty, but I’m good looking so you have to put up with my shit” type either. I will smash and put your number under ignore as I’m leaving. No lie.

  4. You spoke volumes to me here J! I’m not going to say much because like always the commenters (esp. Vain) always brings up my train of thought but personally I’ve been going through most, if not all, of the above and now just trying to readjust. I’m glad to know that I’m not the only one to experience this, as I had no one to rely on growing up as far as the gay life goes. This forum allows me to shape up into the Fox I was always destined to be and I thank you.

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