i don’t think i woulda been happy with all the males i had the most interest in.

My First
Giggles The Clown
Lipz
Work Wolf
The Baller Wolf
WW3 (the last one)

all of these wolves had something in common.
they were all wolves i really wanted.
dated some,
stupid interested in others,
but they all had a common trait

They were all narcissists.

not only did they all hurt my feelings,
but they were all scared little jackals who acted like big tough baddies.
it was simply sassiness.
they were all sassy.
i like males who are aggressive.
they were too…….
“damsel in distress”?

i’ll admit they all looked good,
some “aight”,
but i did too much bending in order to be wanted back.
they all loved and craved the attention we were giving them.
the fantasy i created in my head was intoxicating.
in my mental storytelling and jackin off manterial,
they fucked as good as they looked and came off.
according to some dick reports i heard…

“Eh.”

so they weren’t good partners and can’t fuck.
it’s a shame i learned all this after being so obsessed.
i would have been so annoyed.

“i coulda had a damn v8”.
they turned out to be regular narcissists who fed off my interest.

they gave attention,
flirted in sassy,
acted interested,
pulled away,
came back,
wanted my attention,

used triangulation,
were emotionally abusive,
exceptional liars,
acted like they were different,
and all used ghosting as a way to end things.

i’d hate to be the people who are fucking them now.

“FUCK ME!
FUCK ME!
OH GOD YES!
RIGHT THERE!”

 …and just as it’s getting good,
they stop and go hide under the bed.

they all aren’t good in bed so they probably don’t even get that far.

they were all good at playing games and murdering self-worth.
they knew what they were doing that you’d think all these muthafuckas were jigsaw.
“would you like to play a game?”
hellllll nah and have some mace while you’re at it.

i can’t turn back time,
but if i was the fox i am now,
i would have been way different.
the outcomes wouldn’t have left me devastated.
coulda,
woulda,
shoulda…
i know better now.
i guess it all worked out anyway.

They are all ruining someone else’s life other than mine.

Author: jamari fox

the fox invited to the blogging table.

9 thoughts on “i don’t think i woulda been happy with all the males i had the most interest in.

  1. they were all scared little jackals who acted like big tough baddies.
    it was simply sassiness.
    they were all sassy.
    i like males who are aggressive.
    they were too…….
    “damsel in distress”?

    ^^ this right here. I notice all the “rough tough New York butch queens “ are the most bitch made emotionally only one from my past
    who I’m still cool with (philly) kept it real and wasn’t “emotionally manipulative” or played mind games

    One of my concerns with the new age sexual fluidity is I feel like men aren’t afraid of being as trash as they want bc any and everything goes under the guise of “sexual liberation and freedom”

    So the more time that passes, we deviate from
    Monogamous relationships bc the attention sexually and passion they get from men on twitter and having followers and clout has taken the place of partnership. Just them and their phone and grindr jackd dates until they’re 40-50+

    1. ^dating in 2021 is really interesting.

      i’ll be 100:
      i’m not really impressed with a majority of relationships i see.
      they always look so pretty on ig and in stories,
      but it’s always a fluke.
      even if folks are hiding their relationships,
      they still be nothing to admire from near or far.

      some males in this life are emotional liabilities tbh.
      they will act one way but when you think they gonna step up,
      they fall flat.
      yet they want their dick sucked in the morning and before bed.
      it’s ridiculous.

  2. My best friend clocked me. He said the type of guys I attract wouldn’t expect me to pick them up for a date, make tons of money and would be wanting to take on a more traditional masculine role. I didn’t think about this but when he told me how guys react to his car, etc it showed me how pervasive this “City Girl” mindset is. Everyone wanting a Rolls Royce to pick them up on the first date.

    You are not what you attract. You attract based on who people think you are.

    Also, I have had to learn that I can either be alone or ‘let a man be a man’. For now, I’m choosing alone. Men need to feel needed and I’m very independent and don’t want anyone doing for me.

    It’s funny how all of the bios on apps say “get a job, not generous, all of you are broke bums”, but when you tell a guy what you do for a living he’s intimidated. So it’s whatever at this point.

    Don’t fit yourself into a box of who people think you should be. There are no rules to this and nobody truly knows what they’re doing. They either follow the direction of their erection, whoever make their hole twitch or who would get gasps when walking out in public. “You pulled him?!”

    It’s giving lottery chances of finding a connection with someone you could be locked up with on a pandemic island and not want to throw them to the shark infested waters.

    1. @Seli: you just spoke my life in these here paragraphs! This is why I give up and also choosing “alone”. I LITERALLY had a professional, well-educated man tell me to my face that my problem was that I don’t make men feel needed. I’ve also had men tell me that I ask too many questions when I simply inquired as to what they did for a living. I was trying to be optimistic and kept playing the game with changing rules but now I’m just good. Don’t even want fuck buddies at this point…

      1. Yes Steve I had a dude ask me “is this an interview and chuckle on the first day of me meeting him” I’m sorry I’m not dropping my pants in the bathroom like ppl are used to. I’m sorry y’all call everything Slut shaming in 2021

        We got 5 tropes

        The broke niggas looking for rich niggas

        The men who are 28-up still wanting clout and fame from the internet and trying to be famous with no talent

        The scammers

        The escorts

        The snow queens

        I can’t do it anymore

    2. ^this is so powerful and it’s resonating with me.

      i feel like some males want to be chased around,
      gawked at,
      fought over,
      but don’t put in the same amount of work with me.
      i give attention and show i’m attracted,
      but i’m always having to chase some asshole around.

      thats when i learned i’ve attracted only narcs and this is their behavior.

  3. It’s funny how all of the bios on apps say “get a job, not generous, all of you are broke bums”, but when you tell a guy what you do for a living he’s intimidated. So it’s whatever at this point.
    ^^

    What’s funnier is they dont be having jobs or cars or pay rent and never went to school they’re simply not humble because onlyfans fives them a couple thousand a month to show hole that’s why everyone’s a proud “slut” now like it’s gon carry them

    None of them have a womb to be Kim k

    Men aren’t wired to provide for a grown Man U see that only when a man is young enough to look like a twink

  4. I do this thing of self-reflection myself and it really helps me to see I’m at such a great space with myself without those people in my life.

    I do agree though the crushes I had and the work it feels I put into guys that saw me as a stepping stool and not as a true friend/interest hurt a lot but the stage I’m in in life I know they would have only dragged me down by a lot.

  5. My friends don’t understand why I’m currently disinterested in relationships. Dudes are too needy, too insecure, too shallow, too envious, too weak-minded, too emotionally stunted, too bitter, or too passive. I like good looks and body, but it gets old when there’s nothing behind it but a vapid, entitled, narcissistic man-princess. I’m not a demigod myself, but I bring a lot to the table and would rather fly solo than compromise my standards.

    Even having platonic friends can be tricky because you have to sift through the friends that are: just trying to fuck, looking for clout, low key jealous of you, severely damaged, or clueless on how to actually be a friend. I’ve had to cut off or downgrade friends who tried to use me, lied on me, attempted to cock block, or were constantly negging me out of jealousy or insecurity. It sucked, but I got over it once I realized that it was those people with the problem and I still have real ones in my corner.

    It’s important to be honest about the level of bullshit in our community, but it’s also important to remain optimistic because there are good friends and relationships out there.

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