You’re Not GAY Until You Say It

dream-hampton_jay-z-497hip hop journalist,
dream hampton ( x bio ),
decided to weigh in on some same sex issues today.
boy,
2013 has been off to a gay start, hasn’t it?
she says you are not gay until you self id as gay.
which means you can suck and fuck whoever you want.
just don’t say you are the “g” word.
look at what she had to say on her twitter this morning…

start from the bottom and get here

Screen Shot 2013-05-06 at 12.50.03 PMScreen Shot 2013-05-06 at 12.49.40 PMScreen Shot 2013-05-06 at 12.49.02 PMScreen Shot 2013-05-06 at 12.47.47 PMScreen Shot 2013-05-06 at 12.47.11 PMScreen Shot 2013-05-06 at 12.46.41 PMFOUND @ HER TWITTER

hmm.
very interesting.
i’m sure this will make the down low “everyone” sleep at night.
i also think she is going to make every sista do this:

tumblr_inline_mkrbcwSgum1qz4rgpthoughts?

Author: jamari fox

the fox invited to the blogging table.

18 thoughts on “You’re Not GAY Until You Say It

  1. She is not saying anything crazy.

    Certain sex acts doesn’t necessarily define sexuality. We talked about this at the foxhole. It’s always been a personal identification thing, accepting that label you give yourself, and acting accordingly.

    Some people don’t want to label themselves and still manage to get the nuts. Okay, they can be crazy like Jay.

    Situational sex happens a lot. Everyone didn’t go to college or was around attractive people growing up they wanted to sample so when you might meet that person at the airport, the gym, at work, at church or apartment complex things tend to get acknowledged and polished.

    Doesn’t mean that they are gay or SGL, unless it does because that’s how they self identify.

    1. ^you know black women do not see this as a valid statement, right?
      will they procreate with a wolf who has banged out a couple foxholes and still identify as straight?
      i highly doubt it.

      1. They have already. They do daily. It’s happening right now.

        Women, in general, should start asking the right questions.

        Stop asking, “Are you gay?” start asking, “Have you been with any men?” and be prepared for the nuanced answer.

        If they’ve been homophobic before or made statements like they won’t be with a man who’s been with a man, he gonna keep fucking them and men too–out of spite and sport.

        Men are gonna get they nuts regardless. A dick is never gonna suck itself so be prepared to accept who has acknowledged and polished that dick before and stop all the false outrage and ” I would never sleep with…” cause they already have and they do!

        1. ^once they accept this,
          things will move smoothly.
          they cant because i guess how the church has raised us.
          the church made us homophobes.
          it always kills me how the gay choir director is front row as the pastor is talking down to him.
          anyway black people have a habit of pushing people deep in the closet.
          once we learn to accept people for who they are,
          life will “bloom” so to speak.

  2. When did words start speaking louder than actions? I do think sexuality is fluid and labeling doesn’t necessarily work, but they certainly can’t claim “straight”. Or can they?

    So was Jason Collins lying to his ex-girlfriend of 8 years by not identifying as gay during that time?

    1. Yes he was lying. He said he knew during puberty that he was gay but finally to accept it many years later. Internally he was struggling on how to navigate a gay identity but chose to deny himself by appearing to be something that he knows on the inside that he is not. That was the conflict.

      There is a difference between being discreet about your accepted sexuality while being comfortable with its performances AND denying who you really are, whether you’ve accepted yourself or not, and dragging other people into your lies to cover your shame about your conflicted sexuality. Huge difference.

      This is how people get hurt and why DL men worldwide are despised by self-identifying gays, bis, and straights alike.

      1. And just how do we know someone hasn’t internally accepted who they are, despite what they may say? We reading minds and hearts now?

        Again, when did words start speaking louder than actions? Apparently they’ve accepted that they at least like it, by going back. We’re talking about experiences, plural.

        And your second paragraph….DL men haven’t self-identified, so they aren’t gay now? Jason was on the DL. Did he not drag his ex? That doesn’t appear to be self-identification to me (accepting it)?

        And saying he knew since puberty doesn’t mean squat. A lot of the guys have been in denial since puberty, so of course they’ve known since puberty, lol.

  3. Hell no that shit ain’t valid what’s wrong with y’all. If I’m a serial killer killing people and I tell myself that I’m not one, I guess i’m not one then right? STOP IT STOP IT. They have a name for people like that, it’s called denial.

      1. But DL is an identity right?

        Someone who identifies as DL is openly hiding (oxymoron) their sexual activities and relationships.

        That’s on yall if let a DL dude tell you he ain’t gay (or anything) cause you just sucked his dick and it hurts your feelings.

        He is a talking phallus a breathing fleshlight. Fuck his mindset and feelings, let’s be clear.

        This ain’t The Weekend, keep all that depressing bullshit, problems, conflicted manhood issues to your crazy, but good dick/good ass having self.

        You don’t have to be gay to get your dick sucked. Since when?

        10 out of 10 times he is only good for some undercover dick/ass anyway. Ain’t nobody tryna date, get in the guts/mouth, give up the freshly fleeted ass and scram.

        It’s called hit and run for a reason.

        That’s why I look at some of yall in askance like why the hell you wanna “date” a DL dude. You fuck lying bastards and you move on. Don’t let them fools lay ground rules and don’t feed him like he’s your man. Someone, oftentimes, is already claiming him and can’t stand his ass either.

        Ninja it’s late, see the lube, see the condoms, are we fucking or what? That’s the conversation. None of this ego stroking bullshit, slick gay bashing bullshit. Clip that, wrap it in plastic.

        There’s no lingering, getting to know you stage. Beat and skeet. Bye. Don’t have to call or text me. I’m good and grown. Early.

      2. Well if we want to know real answers about DL dudes, lets ask them ourselves.

        Why are y’all Down low dudes the ways y’all are? Why can’t y’all be like the discreet bros?

  4. her gay bosses must have forced her to say that, maybe kerry is a sponsor and aint to happy about peanut

  5. I get where Dream Hampton is coming from. Some parts I agree with and others, I’d like to hear her explain more. Even though it’s certainly not the same thing, I equate it to how black people either identify with or shun the word “nigga.” Some folks would say, “I am not a nigga. That word doesn’t define me and is very destructive” Others would say, “I am a real nigga…meaning, I’m loyal and authentic.” It all really comes down to identity politics and how a man may relate to or define yourself by certain terms.

    By having sex with men and not thinking you are gay isn’t necessarily being in denial. For instance, for some people, to be “gay” implies that you not only have sex with men, but accept a more passive role. Therefore, a man who sees himself as the aggressor may feel he doesn’t/can’t identify with the gay lifestyle.

    Similarly, some men who consider themselves “straight,” think it relates to how he conducts himself in public by being “The Man” through displaying high athletic/physical, and social prowess.

    Now, the line of thinking Dream puts forth often times falls apart in the real world. I mean, this isn’t “SPARTA” and we aren’t training young boys to be soldiers anymore, but we’ll still put an emphasis on glorifying our athletic ability and minimizing our public display of emotion.

    Because of that, most women, I’d assume are not trying to entertain the idea that men could be attracted to both sexes and still be considered a “man”….whatever that means. However, it still happens. Men suck dick and eat pussy….AT THE SAME DAMN TIME lol

    Isn’t it funny how women usually aren’t taken that serious when it comes to sexuality, though. I mean, when women kiss other women, it’s sexy and not to be taken serious. But when men kiss other men, it’s sexually deviant. IDK man lol.

  6. Its odd to me how we can take something that is concrete like ‘homosexual’ which means someone who is sexually attracted to someone of the same gender, and then try to say that despite fitting this defintion… because they themselves do not identify as homosexual they are in turn not homosexual. This is not a debate. You can throw all of these hypotheticals and hollywood scripts out there about self identity and denial and he only sleeps with men on the third sunday of a leap year but at the end of the day…. man+man+sex= homosexual. This is not complicated.

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