i’ll never forget how scared i was when i went to see spike lee’s,
“summer of sam“.
i remember karaoke dropping me home and running my ass into my building.
she was equally as scared too.
i’m not scared of myers,
krueger,
or voorhies.
i’ll admit i was shook over chuckie and zombies as a kid tho.
“summer of sam” was based on a real serial killer in new yawk by the name of david berkowitz.
his thing was shooting people,
either in cars or walking,
at point-blank range.
he claims his next-door neighbor’s dog told him to kill people.
he had this city in a headlock in the late 70s.
the case always fascinated me tbh.
i decided to watch the first episode of “the sons of sam: a descent into darkness” on netflix yesterday…

but i can’t fuck with the other 3 episodes…

Continue reading “hi, i’m an empath and i f*cked up my vibe watching some sh*t on netlflix” →

littttttttttttttttttterally tho.
i was waiting and pushing back,
prolonging and hoping it would go away,
but i knew it was coming sooner or later.
i’m sure many folks were feeling the same way tbh.

I knew I was gonna owe money on my taxes.

imagine being unemployed,
but still having to owe money for taxes.
usually,
i get back taxes,
but this year was much different.
well i did my taxes last night with karaoke and…

Continue reading “i tried to dodge it but it came hard in my face” →

i never get the wolf i want.
ever.
like,
ever,
ever.
i always have the pleasure of attracting the ones i want,
but we always have this intense moment until something splits us up.
no cap,
but they always end up having:

BIG.
BETA.
ENERGY.

all bark; no bite especially where i want to be bit.
it never fails…

Continue reading “i just want him to want me back (am i asking for the stars? i might just be)” →

you ever got an email like ^that from your boss and it ended with:

“Please advise…”

“just following up” and“what’s the ETA on” are similar phrases that give britney face.
it’s usually the first thing on a monday or right before you leave on a friday.
so now you gotta dig through your emails to show you aren’t a doofus.

“Found it!”

you forward it,
leave a passive-aggressive “let me know if you have any concerns“,
and go back to watching a youtube video.
God forbid you can’t find it tho,
you’ll get chewed out and the infamous:

“Going forward…”

those who work in corporate offices know how it goes.
ya’ll know.
one sentence i’ve seen in a few emails that are usually attached to fuckery is…

Continue reading “per my last email, i will remind you who satan is and why i ownz your soul” →

foxhole,
today has been a day.
it’s like if it ain’t one thing then it’s the other.
where do i start?…

Continue reading “i heard it was supposed to snow, but i didn’t hear anything about a shit storm” →

i was all set to head down to brooklyn for thanksgiving.
my home-vixen i use to work with,
one that i haven’t seen in a hot minute,
was throwing a small get-together at her crib.
the issue i was having was how i was getting down there.
she promised me a ride,
but in case that fell through,
i was gonna hop in an uber.

I wasn’t doing MTA at all

we have been watching the rona news carefully.
new yawk has been starting to spike something stupid.
cuomo was talking about gatherings only having 10 people.
well,
she sent me this today…

Continue reading “how to lose friends and alienate people for thanksgiving” →