I woke up to an email that sort of pissed me off.
I had to stop reading it half way because I was over it by the second paragraph.
Here we go again….
Another I am leaving.
No “lets talk about it” or “well why do feel this way?”.
No “I care a lot about you and I understand my fault but….”
It is “FUCK YOU. I’M LEAVING. BYE.”
My “man” would never do that to me.
Someone that is interested would have heard me out.
All these wonderful things in this email that you were gonna provide,
but not once did I hear “baby, I feel you but let me get your azz right….”
… and I did say I was going to bed because 1) I was tired and 2) The long choppy emails were annoying.
why are you “leaving”?
No one sent you away.
I never said leave me alone.
YOU said you were leaving.
And all because I defended someone I though was being treated unfairly??
YOU took it as “GET THE FUCK OUT“.
I never said that to you.
You assumed and if that is the case, you know what they say about ASS-uming.
You are just use to being in control and you cannot control me.
That is where the whole “contradictions” came in.
I’m not that guy.
I don’t care who they are, what Baller Wolf they are, or how much stock they in my life.
There is door.
Someone else with traits you are lacking will walk right in and want some of this good stuff.
I don’t chase anyone that wants to leave because they WANT too.
I chase people who are leaving who show me they are willing to fight for me in the end.
Not people who could just up and leave like I was NOTHING (and for no reason).
I’m not gonna cry, be sad, or defeated because someone left for practically no reason.
Realistically, I didn’t know you or see you to be that upset.
I’m just going to be angry and curse you in my mind until the next day.
What would happen if we were together and you left me in the middle of nowhere?
You get mad one time and leave me stuck with a debt??
You get bored with me, find someone else to fuck, and leave me when I fall in love?
And on Thanksgiving, where I was thankful you were in my life.
Bet you didn’t know or realize that?
And you know my past because I told you things and how I was treated and you left me like everyone else did.
You are truly a winner.
I would have LOVED to been with you.
… With as much sarcasm as possible.
P.S – Thank you what for you brought into my life for your brief stay.
If I can’t argue or disagree with you,
without you flying off the handle and leaving,
then you aren’t the one for me.
AND EVEN AFTER IT, I WILL STILL SEE THE GOOD IN YOU.
I will be okay because I know someone else will scoop me if you never do.
I know my worth and I know I am better than all these boys out here.
I bring something to the table, pretty much keep my mouth shut, and you would be STUPID to leave me alone.
At the end of the day, it is bullshit and way too much energy.
ALSO: I was TIRED of talking about sex.
I wanted to try being serious and see where it went.
I liked you (or the image you portayed)… too much actually.
All we did was talk about how good you were gonna fuck me…
… and if you had all those things you were going to do for me,
I would NOT be writing this right now.
Every one else who takes me seriously:
HAVE A HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
I’m officially over it and I’ll be gone til tomorrow.