most of us have triggers.
if you don’t or have worked through yours,
the rest of us either keep it under control or react nastily when confronted by them.
I don’t like being called “girl” or “sis”
bullies tormented me every day by calling me a “girl” or sissy”.
even my own parents would imply that i was “soft“.
i’ll never forget going somewhere with my father in barbados.
i was sitting in the car as he met up with one of his friends.
my father always wanted to intro me to his friends as he should.
i was sitting there,
minding my business,
just happy to be with my father,
his friend said:
he look soft.
Aww he so soft.”
my father went on to say it was my mother’s fault that she made me this way.
as a child,
imagine how that felt to hear that because i was hearing it a lot at school.
I went to an all boy’s school in Barbados,
i’ll never forget that moment because it hurt my feelings.
i think it made me into a chameleon too.
i felt like being myself was a problem when all i did was be shy.
i was a very shy child growing up.
i didn’t want to be seen as “feminine” so i did my best to be invisible.
i’ve come to realize:
I’ve been a trigger for other people as well
some see me as a threat or “i’m not supposed to feel this way for another male“.
we might awaken the triggers in other people and not even realize it.
i have since worked through those issues,
but i still don’t like being called girl or sis.
some gays will call you a “sis” outta love,
but use the same word maliciously when you cross them.
others get insulted because you don’t want to be addressed as such.
Even some of the vixens are calling other males “girls” and “sis” being shady
how many males are called “girls” because they may take dick?
they are suspected as gay so gays spitefully address them in the feminine?
it’s really tragic and hurt people do hurt people.
the thing with triggers is we can’t get mad at other people who trigger us.
most of the time,
they don’t know us or what we been through.
we can’t lash out at anyone if we haven’t educated them.
now if they continue to do it even after we’ve told them:
try to heal the parts of you that are still broken.
we can’t take out anger on everyone else because we have been destroyed.