as of late,
i’ve started to realize something.
after this whole “michael sam” debacle,
what laverne cox said in that article yesterday,
and a comment jay left in the comment box,
i found what i wanted to say…
everyone in this life has this agenda of:
“please accept me”
is it wrong that i think its absolute bullshit?
its like we need someone to come out the closet so it can urge others to come out.
“well if *insert celebrity here* would come out the closet,
it would help others to see blah blah blah…”
my thing is…
has that really worked tho?
michael sam was supposed to be the “masculine out savior”.
the pre-baller wolf who isn’t “the stereotype”.
sure he came out the closet,
but his priorities are not in order.
which was playing ball,
has now become a joke.
dancing with the stars.
documentaries with oprah.
leaving an actual team for “personal reasons”.
he showed me that he wasn’t a good baller wolf to begin with.
he also showed me he was all about them lights and cameras.
i don’t look up to him and was never really impressed.
personally i really don’t look up to anyone.
i like certain artists for their talent or how they make me feel,
but i don’t wait for them to say some life alerting speech.
its getting so bad out here that we need pop stars to fight for us.
a damn pop star.
toss her hair,
be a diva,
and raise our self esteem too?
people be out here disrespecting lives over a complete stranger.
someone who will block your ass in a moments notice.
once they start to fall off,
or get into some scandal,
we throw them aside and search for a new idol.
its this constant cycle of not being satisfied.
i am a strong believer in learning to accept yourself.
you came into this world alone and will die the same way.
if you depend on everyone to “be your crutch”,
or speak for your sexuality,
you will spend years searching for someone to fulfill you.
thats not how i want to spend my life.
even with the foxhole,
i am not a role model at all.
i’m not perfect and thats perfect.
if everyone would look to themselves,
and see just how powerful they can be,
we wouldn’t need some random to “speak for us”.
you be so into doing your own shit,
what the next person does wouldn’t even phase you.
it would lead to less disappointments as well.
its time to start finding yourself and stop looking for someone else to.
go look in the mirror and accept your damn self.
live YOUR truth.
not anyone elses because they told you so.
you live in your world.
no one else does.
do what makes you comfortable and decorate how you please.
as long as you aren’t harming anyone,
or lying out of insecurity,
then you have all right to do you.
just some thoughts before bed.
honesty can be a crime these days so you might have arrest my black ass.