If eyes are the window to the soul…

…then I must have my curtains down.

Seriously, I am so bad at eye contact.
I do a lot of looking off and looking to the side when I am speaking to someone.
I am also terrible at the whole Wolf eye fuckin’ thing too.
I never could get it right and when I do, I feel like I am being obvious as hell.
I am sure they think I’m stuck up or not interestedand the latter isn’t the case.
A lot of people are naturals at this eye fuckin’ thing, but I am such a bad eye fuck.

How do you get them to cum to you with your eyes?


I was on Rexclusive blog today,
and he had a topic about meeting a sexy dude at his job and not being able to look at him in his eyes.
Being in this lifestyle, Wolves and Foxes communicate by eye contact.
We know who gets down and who doesn’t just by our eyes, but for some of us it isn’t easy.
You do not want to be wrong.
In public situations, I never know which is which because a Fox isn’t trying to get robbed or outed.

Case in point…

I met a D/L  Wolf last weekend at a “get together” I was invited too.
I decided to step outside the box and do something I rarely do.
Funny enough, we saw each other on the train platform on my way there.
In my mind, I thought he was sexy as hell.
His body was super right and he was handsome, but he looked “straight“.
I will admit, I kept low key staring at him and we would lock eyes briefly, but I would look off.
He turned in my full direction… and that is when I got nervous.
I did some light looking and expected him to head nod or even wink, but nothing happened.
I just dismissed him as straight and left it alone.
When he walked in the same get together later that night,
I said a quick prayer to God and had to make sure I got his info.
I ended up walking up to him and getting his number that night.
Only because I knew for sure he got down due to our surroundings.

He said something to me that stuck with me when I told him I peeped him earlier.

Yeah, I saw you on the train platform.
I’m D/L so I only give a nigga a quick look
and if he doesn’t pick it up then I move on.

When I saw you, I thought, “Damn, he is sexy as shit. Nice little body and got style.”  When you looked at me and then looked off, I kept it moving.
When I saw you walk back in here just now, I was like “damn shorty looks right”.


If he didn’t come in that get together,
andI didn’t go up to him and say something (that is another story),
I would have missed that connection.

Another example is a Fox of the past told me his Wolf-friend tried to get at me on the train.
He saw me and the Fox walking together and instantly called him to ask him who I was and if I got down. He allegedly tried to send me some eye fuck love and I totally dissed him.
Sigh.


So how do we do this “stare” thing successfully?
I have been told my stare is piercing,
which causes Wolves to look away,
but strangely enough causes Vixens to get turned on.
Wrong species!
I feel like I need an instruction manual in the art of staring or something.
Hell, in the proper techniques in Wolf catching.
Once I started talking to the D/L Wolf, I was able to stare at him in eyes with no issues.
Staring in his eyes a little too much to be honest.
So what I want to know is…

How do you know a Wolf is even looking at you in “that way”?

Author: jamari fox

the fox invited to the blogging table.

16 thoughts on “If eyes are the window to the soul…

  1. The real question is: What was he expecting you to do on that platform? You met his gaze more than once… what else did he want? A head nod? A hello? Why didn’t he just take the initiative and come up to you if he thought: “damn shorty looks right”?

    Help me because I don’t understand

    1. well from what he was saying,
      last time he stared at some Fox he thought got down on the platform,
      that Fox was actually straight and said, “yo why you staring at me? are you a fuckin faggot?”
      Concrete Forest Wolves/Fox can be wreck-less with the barking.
      needless to say, that stopped him from doing that lol!

      trust me, i asked in-between flirting.

  2. This kind of blows my mind because I don’t read that much into it. If I see a dude staring at me I’m thinking “Why is this dude staring at me?” not “He wants me.”

    I’m oblivious to anything but a direct approach honestly, because I feel every way a guy shows he’s interested is too ambiguous, it can be interpreted in many different ways.

  3. Because you’ve been looking at him the whole time to understand his signal and was confident enough to approach OR moved yourself into a position to be approached.

    Underlying issues get in the way of all of that; basically you just gotta get over yourself and your insecurities–easier said than done. I know.

    Here’s how:

    Stop putting wolves on a pedestal-he is just another man, like you, with quirks and flaws.
    Look everyone in the eye; looking off to the side shows insecurity, that you’re a liar, or you dont even believe the words coming out of your mouth.
    Fear rejection, but work through it anyway. Just because someone might call you faggot doesn’t mind that you won’t be bending for them later or have their legs over your shoulders.
    Stop putting wolves on a pedestal.
    Stop thinking he wouldn’t want you or doesn’t want you when you having spoken two words to him.
    Understand a lot of men, regardless of orientation, suffers from low self-esteem. Overvaluing yourself is just as bad as undervaluing yourself–and it comes from the same place.
    Date or hunt against type. Wolves, foxes, and vixens have friends and associates, always expand your network.
    For three weeks, go to every social gathering alone. Get in the habit or being alone and not lonely and work on your observational skills. Fine wolves run in packs, but they are more likely to approach/be approachable when you are solo.
    Stop putting wolves on a pedestal.

    Dudes who stop breathing when they see you, get extra goofy, start stammering or stuttering whenever you’re around or even avert their eyes when you get dressed are usually feeling you.

  4. —- Quoting ICeeDedPpl —–

    “Just because someone might call you faggot doesn’t mean that you won’t be bending for them”….

    Amen to that!!!!!!!…….

  5. Whew!

    I thought it was only me battling this. This happened just tuesday with me. Two of my Vixen co-workers and I went out to eat for lunch…a sexy Wolf came in shortly and at across from us on the other side of the bar….I noticed he keep staring in our direction and looking away but it was tough because dude kept on his sunglasses…so i just brushed me off as him staring at the Vixens. Mind you…I would glance over every so often…and he was still looking. But what shocked me was dude was staring even after the Vixens left before me…but there was no approaching or signs so I left…I am not one for rejection or being called out in public.

    I’ll actually gladd that ICeeDedPpl got on us like that because that is what we all need…to stop trying make these Wolfs think they all that and more…shit we’re the ones who should be on pedestals for all the shit we put up with on and off court…but thats another story…who knows maybe I’ll up my eye fuckin’ game.

  6. Hahahaha I’ve been kinda sorta eye fucking these two dudes at the gym for the last three weeks. We look at each other for a brief second and then I look away. I guess I’m nervous or something like that. IDK

  7. I think the part i find most difficult is that if he finds me appealing or whatever then I’m the one who has to go out of their way to give them the opportunity to talk to me. If you’re staring me down, why must I have to go up and introduce myself to you? I recognize that often isn’t any logic to a lot of what men do though.

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