he was a good guy.
one of the nice ones.
like,
genuinely nice and warm.
we met on a site but there were no sparks.

just because there are no sparks,
that doesn’t mean i still won’t be friends with someone.

so even though he often tried to still hit on me,
i made sure to let him know i wasn’t interested.
he was cool about it.
when his mother died a year or four into our friendship…

it really destroyed him because they were really close.
he had a hard time readjusting after her death.
this is when all the randoms came in.
about two years after her death,
and from the unnecessary stress from his job,
he had a heart attack and died.
i still believe he died from a broken heart.

my truth.

the guilt i have rn is during the time before his death,
we fell out.
he was dating a twink whore who was using him.
that is the thing with nice guys:

they don’t always see clearly until someone points it out.

i tried to warn him about his new twink whore,
but he wasn’t trying to hear it.
so i removed myself from the situation only to hear he passed.
that has haunted me for a long time.

i was reminded it was his birthday was the other day.
it made me sad that even though he loved bringing people together,
he often attracted many jackals into his life.

between his birthday,
and star fox’s coming up soon,
i have been feeling grief.

rip to the good guy.
i hope he celebrated it well his mother.
i’m sorry that i never got a chance to speak to you before you left.