i feel like the life of being a sex worker should come with a warning.
even if we see folks with nice shit after fuckin’ all their days,
that doesn’t mean true happiness.
money doesn’t mean shit when you have sold your soul tbh.
i was thinking about something the other day.
you know i like to stew on topics before we chat about it on the foxhole.
i was thinking about all this fuckin’ everyone is doing for a living

Is it really natural?

check it…

we have people that are on legit serious drugs just to do this.
they can’t get turned on naturally so they have to drug themselves up.
they are drug addicts for sexual gratification.
they are wearing out their bodies,
and even souls just to sell a few sex videos on onlyfans.
they got an audience of ungrateful folks who complain every fuckin second.

“That scene was boring.”
“He is terrible as a TOP.”
“He should be a BOTTOM.”
“His ass is worn out.”
“He gives his dick to everyone.”
“I wanna see him take dick.”
“He took the dick and can’t really take it.”
“The dick took him and the dick couldn’t take him.”

when someone new comes along,
this same audience throws these folks in the trash.
as soon as reality hits while they’re in the trash,
they become even bigger drug addicts.
meth today; heroin tomorrow.
not to mention it’s hard to bounce back from the stigma of sex work.
there is a real world that people actually live in.

i dunno…

it just made me think about the benefits?
with all this wear and tear on their bodies,
do they get health and dental?
what about 401k?

when do they retire from doing sex work?
do they just go get a 9 to 5 and pretend this never happened?
will their audience still support them if they aren’t on onlyfans?

do they bow out gracefully when things stop working or…

Is this career simply one big-ass addiction that we are watching in real-time?

Author: jamari fox

the fox invited to the blogging table.


  1. Jamari, is getting deep.

    I don’t think people are ready to discuss this because the pandemic has us all wanting to get out and be freaks this summer.

    Sex work is like garbagemen. Nobody wants to do it, but somebody has to….

    1. I kinda thought about this the other when I saw one of the Only Fan boys pop up in a YouTube vid I watch about ” What People are wearing in New York” and I realized he works at Dover Street Market which sells a little of high end fashion. So I was thinking maybe its just a way to make some extra money and not the be all end all for him but the others I dunno …honestly I kinda miss regular porn and porn stars. The onlyfans route now has become such a routine that it has now become boring (at least for me).

        1. Thanks. I just hate arbitrary thoughts/ideals and enjoy calling things things. Lol

  2. People become sex workers (modern day post pandemic) because they needed money and felt like they have sex for free why not Jack off on onlyfans

    Around summer 2021 many of the 2020 batch got off OF citing anxiety and lowered self esteem and self worth

    This NEW batch + some residual that became stars during that time (the ones mentioned in the article) are long haulers. The ones who moved to Atlanta and HAVE to do OF because it’s how they pay their bills. They’re in too deep to quit at this point. Plus the increased visibility from doing sex work gets them popular and let’s them have their pick of other sex worker gays

  3. Sex work is real work. ‘Is it really natural?’ Of course it is. It’s the oldest profession in the world. Jamari, you know I love you & what you do but I have to say you are adding to the stigma w/the tone of your post. ‘sold your soul’, ‘drug addicts’ are just 2 examples of the inflammatory language you’re using here. Please stop the shaming. Drug use in the gay community is rampant as it is in the general population so there’s going to be drug addicts in any profession. We have a drug epidemic in this country that has been downplayed majorly even more so because the pandemic has taken over (google ‘U.S. drug epidemic’ & you’ll see). People drug themselves up just to do any job everyday in every profession. It’s just more visible w/sex workers because they’re on social media constantly. So please don’t be fooled.

    The stigma comes from our puritan societal values which come from religion. Religion taints & fucks up everything. I think people who feel badly about doing sex work are battling w/their own inner demons of low self worth & feeling shame due to the conservative values they’ve been taught. People who judge sex work are battling those same demons too. So let’s support sex workers & not tear them down. They provide a great service to help us feel good about ourselves & our bodies in order to get off.

    1. He is not stigmatizing them. He is opening up the conversation to talk about a very real side effect of sex work instead of sweeping it under the rug because “They provide a great service to help us feel good about ourselves & our bodies in order to get off”. What about their bodies? What about their mental and physical health? What about them feeling good? You sought to validate them, but tearing Jamari down when he was not invalidating them is not the way. He is showing empathy and very real concern for them and shining a light on the darker side of sex work. He’s posing very real rhetorical questions that people on either side of the camera should be thinking about.

  4. I think we talk alot about ‘destigamatizing’ sex work, but I think we overlook the fact that it’s not exactly a blanket issue. These young blatino queens who (ruined) moved to Atl in order to try to catch a coin off of the fact that they were alrdy jakd/grindr sluts giving it up out of boredom, are who I think of when reading your post. However, let’s not forget about the entire industry of attractive, fit, socially skilled (mostly white and latino) men who function as sex workers for very generous men and amounts of money.

    I wonder what those men who deal w monied, closeted men do long term. I’d imagine some of them are smart enough to stash (if not lock it down) for a future, but as for these lil ATL ‘blinks’ (blatino twinks), God bless their terrible content producing hearts.

    1. Thank u clap 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾 And what about the negative shit they promote

      Sex work is one thing going to the club fighting over bigo and glorifying scamming to young people coming up is another

      They don’t just have Sex. If they sis they wouldn’t be in this mess

      1. Right. But as someone on the outside looking in, I do try to give a lil grace when I think about the ‘whys’. There are sooo few VISIBLE examples of functional, adult black gay men, especially when you compare it to the aggressive overabundance of messy, scamming queens who only value social media, stunts and shade. It’s low hanging fruit.

        BGM are constantly being told that our value is based upon our ability to ‘read’, wear a label, and be ‘fabulous’. Im not heavily into SM (other than some YouTube stuff), but how many gay men are visible who AREN’T into sex work or trying to be celebrity/celeb adjacent? Serious question.

        And again, I’m not knocking sex work in general. There are quite a few performers who I would enjoy (if I wasn’t saved n sanctified…) but this newfangled ‘well, I have a dik/ass, might as well try to be an OF ‘model”, movement is not it.

    2. ^those types are exactly who i’m speaking about.
      that is why i used the screen shot from the malik drama with elijah.
      you absolutely got the type of sex workers i was fonting about ♥️

  5. I’m not comfortable with calling it working it’s fucking there’s a difference I’ve work almost all my life for money to get back this is trash no different then prostitution especially when it’s multiple partners and raw totally trash no benefits no respect not working thoting foe $

    1. It’s ‘work’ if it’s not being done for pleasure. While a segment of them are def doing it for pleasure, there is another segment of men who approach things very professionally. Some of those OF guys are making great money because they’re using the platform for exposure for private escort bookings that they’re NOT filming and posting.

      On the other side of the aisle, are the ppl who look down on it from an ‘I would never/don’t have to pay for sex’ pov. But many ppl pay to get to the point of who/what they want while avoiding endless catfish (or robbery/murder/etc) profiles. There are many well off men who will hire their fav model and fly them out to Mexico for a long ‘bf experience’ wkend.

      Not my industry, but I do know that there are levels to the umbrella that is the sex work industry.

  6. If you are an employee of any company, you are figuratively effed every second you are on the job. Sex workers are physically effed and make better money doing it. Plus, they only work when they want to.

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