does dating your opposite really work?

i love jamie lee curtis.
one of my favorite movies of hers that i own is “true lies”.
i saw that movie as a cub and fell in love with her character.
she’s also an iconic scream queen as laurie strode in “halloween”,
one of my favorite slasher flicks.
well i read an interesting article with her today.
she had some advice for how she’s had a long marriage.
this is what she had to say via “good house keeping”

Marry your opposite.

“My husband [actor, musician and screenwriter Christopher Guest, 70] and I are opposites. We have been for 33 years, and we always will be. He’s an intellectual, and I was from the movie star/alcoholic/drug addict side, where ­education was not the most important thing. We don’t listen to the same radio station, we don’t read the same paper, we don’t go to bed at the same time. But we read the same history books. For our 30th anniversary we both read a book called Undaunted Courage, the story of Lewis and Clark. Then we took eight friends and retraced a section of the Missouri River in canoes that followed the path of their expedition. We’re a little nerdy.”

honestly,
i can see that.
it goes with the saying that ima rephrase:

Associate with those who can elevate you

that doesn’t always mean financially.
i always looked at it as in all aspects of life.
i knew a couple like what jamie is talking about.
it was a black vixen and a latino wolf.
he was pretty popular and she wasn’t on the scene at all.
she was into education and bettering herself.
he dated this one pretty latina who he played like a fool,
but he was faithful to the black vixen.
she got him back into school,
where he ended up getting his associates.
last i heard,
they run a business together.
what hooked him was how different she was to what he was use to.
she use to put him in his place when he tried her.
usually,
those relationships work and last much longer.
that might be a “straight” thing tho.

Does this same logic apply to “us”?

do we even get to know each other that long?
i feel like if we aren’t fucking,
we’re:

treating each other like a temp gig
dating an exact clone

i love a good looking wolf with a muscular bawdy,
but i do need him to be cultured in some way.
even if he plays sports or works out,
i’d like him to teach me something.

does he read?
would he be down to read one book a month?

into politics?
i’m not into it,
but can he teach me wtf is happening in our government?
what’s happening in the news?
i love celeb gossip,
but he can fill me in on current events.
how about traveling?
does he want to see other parts of the us and the world?
i do.
cooking?
i don’t necessarily eat healthy all the time,
but maybe he does and can help me get on a better regiment.

those are the few of many things help two people stay interested.
i’d like to learn and explore shit with my man.
if he isn’t down for that then i’m not gonna be intrigued.
you can only impress me with gym life,
selfies,
sex,

and eating healthy for so long.

article cc: good housekeeping

Author: jamari fox

the fox invited to the blogging table.

6 thoughts on “does dating your opposite really work?

  1. I used to go for good guys. But I’m finding that they’re like Lawrence. Acting like good guys. It may be a nicer presentation, but still a f*ckboy underneath.

    I’m trying out a rough-around-the-edges. He’s not intimidated by me speaking proper English and doesn’t say that I ‘talk white’. He’s already winning.

    I’m over guys who look good on paper. Make me happy at this point. I am looking for potential instead of “he has it all’. The ones who have it all…look down on those who don’t. That’s never been me.

    Hopefully I’ll find my scholar with no degrees who’ll be self-made.

    Picture it: The square with the degrees and titles, the entrepreneur who took another path and conquered an overlooked niche.

    Don Lemon and Plies? Haha

    Or maybe I want to try out a ‘bad boy’ and see what the hype is about.

  2. For a while she was in everything. I’ve always liked seeing her in movies though. Hasn’t she been in more comedy movies? This is a risky move for her if I’m right.

    Most couples I’ve seen may look alike but they always have opposite personalities or other characteristics. I think that’s what we all look for in a way.

    Carl, I was feeling you man. You went off the deep end though. I don’t watch Insecure but didn’t Issa cheat on Lawrence first? Damn I’m feeling some way too cause I’m trying to be one of those ‘squares’ with a degree homie

  3. The opposite thing is more common among straights and I have a theory as to why that is.

    Fundamentally straights are attracted to the opposite sex so in turn they’ll find more appeal in someone with different interests and personality traits as well. With us we want the same gender and thusly want qualities in a partner that match our own.

    Notice how Jaime said at they’re core they’re history nerds (I am too) so they found a major common interest and still maintain they’re own identity. With gays they want someone who looks, talks, thinks, and likes the same things as them. It’s probably another reason we struggle with dating. You get tired of your partner so quick because yall into ALL the same stuff.

    Another major point is when it comes to differences Jaime talked about interests and values. With us opposites attract automatically means difference in just looks and that’s it. Interest and personality are an afterthought.

  4. IDK I’m at a point where instead of me looking for certain things in a wolf I’m trying to make sure I have those things in myself and continue to try to be the best version of myself. For me personally I can’t want a man that reads but I can”t remember the last time I picked up a book, or a man in decent shape If I’m not getting my own body together in the gym, etc.

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