when our electronics are moving funky,
it usually helps to turn them off and on again.
if they’re acting like real assholes,
you need to do a full reset.
my emotional hard drive has been moving like a real asshole.
my sleep pattern was all fucked up because of it.
i was going to bed early but waking up at like 4 or 5 am.
throughout the day,
i was throwing up when i started feeling anxious,
which included the early morning hours when i woke up.
i was mixing different kinds of pills to help me sleep.
and melatonin concoctions and still wasn’t sleeping correctly.
all it did was make me groggy and sleepy in the day.
i wasn’t doing anything my therapist was recommending.
there was no motivation for life and the betterment of myself period.
Yo favorite fox was struggling silently out here.
you never know what people are going through and shamed to admit.
so i decided i had a problem and…
I wiped the emotional slate clean.
one of my biggest issues is wanting to be in control.
i felt like if i wasn’t “busy busy busy” that i was a loser.
everyone in social media is “busy busy busy” and here i am feeling no energy for anything.
some days i wanted to wake up and “tek it easssssy“,
but that voice inside was urging me to always be doing “something”.
so i said fuck alla that.
Purge everything and start over.
i stopped everything and wiped the emotional harddrive.
no more pills to invoke sleep
no more snooping on wolves i liked social medias
no more random scrolling on social media
no more giving myself to those i wanted attention from
no more being constantly available
no more trying to be in control
i’ve been waking up feeling rested and haven’t felt any anxiety.
there is this “lighter” feeling once i took all the necessary shit out.
i accepted things how they are and allowed myself to feel.
i feel like i’m getting back to normal again.
i urge you to do a reset if you’re feeling drained or over it.
step away and reset your emotional hard drive.
your mental health may need a moment away from it all.