sometimes i would sit and wonder,
what would i do if my parents showed up at my door?
if in some twist of fate,
a joke from above,
that they didn’t pass away.
they were actually russian spies who had to fake their deaths.
and what about star fox?
what if he turned out to had faked his death because he witnessed a crime.
how would i react if they al showed up on some ol:

“we’re back!
you gonna let us in?
we hungry!”

would we hug?
would i slap them?
curse them out where they stood?
even though those are complete fantasies,
i often think about it when i start to miss them.
when i have no one to talk to or i’m dealing with an issue.
the holidays are coming up so they cross my mind a lot during this time.
sure i have the foxhole,
but i don’t really have a support system out here.
i don’t have a family i can go to if something goes wrong.
that is scary.
that scares me.
i often wonder would things go back to normal if they magically came back?
would i feel better if i had my safety nets again…
Continue reading “Thoughts In Front of The Fire” →

i turned off all my devices last night.
yeah.
i honestly didn’t turn them on until just now.
i watched a few movies and escaped my reality.
quite frank: i needed it.
i got up early this morning,
fixed myself a good breakfast,
and sat on my couch for the majority on the day.
sleeping at some points; thinking the rest.
after speaking to that female yesterday about liar liar,
i came to a conclusion while taking a warm epson salts bath.
one that i already knew,
but soon forgot once i was dealing with this latest test…
Continue reading “Middle Fangaz, Thoughts, and “Aha” Moments” →

“blarggggg ughhh mmmm!.”

wtf?
is this bitch that drunk?…
Continue reading “If It’s Broke, Well Then Cum Fix It (Season Finale)” →

so as you know,
last night started off with two much anticipated season openers.
“the haves and the have nots”  and “being mary jane”.
 my television viewing is over booked.
i promised i would give my thoughts so here we goooo….

Continue reading “The Haves and The Have Nots of Being Mary Jane” →

these two look very unsure in this picture.
well they both look like they about to suck the blood of whoever took the pic.
anyway i missed love and hiphop: ny last night,
but i did catch it today.
some thoughts…

Continue reading “Aww Baby! You Had Me At Comic Sans MS!” →

“whaddup?”

his deep voice blared through my iPhone speaker.

“i’m in trouble.” i said, trying not to sound overly dramatic.

i tend to do that.

“yo whats wrong?
you okay?
who fuckin’ with you?”
you need to come over to your crib?”

god.
i loved when he talked to me like that.
ready to fuck someone up for me on command.
no.
this time this is my fault and i needed his help…

Continue reading “If It’s Broke, Well Then Cum Fix It” →