Faith With Works Is Dead (Well For This Fox Anyway)

nature-cave-forest-dream-hidden-Favim.com-542963i have been doing a lot of thinking these last few days.
my mind has been all over the place.
the thoughts have mostly been about my life.
how things just don’t seem to work out for me.
its like god has put me on this earth to be a joke or something.
the bible teaches about having this thing called “faith”.
it tells you that your faith should be the size of mustard seed.
well it has been.
it has always been.
i try to be as optimistic as i can,
even though i can also be as pessimistic as well.
well the times i was high key optimistic,
i have been absolutely disappointed

no star fox to grow old with
no parents to support me
no friends in this life who have my back
no wolves that are actually loyal
no work wolf to say “finally”

tumblr_mb76a65Gae1qmfh3w
i like to think i am a pretty optimistic.
i can support that theory.
hell i say my prayers every night and morning.
i practice the law of attraction faithfully.
i even keep a gratitude journal.
hell i’m so optimistic that i’m optimistic for other people.
it all seems to bring about the opposite of what i had faith about.

i hoped star fox would be here
i hoped my parents wouldn’t die of various cancers
i hoped i would have more money this year and not live check to check
i hoped work wolf would be the “one”
i hoped mi would have lived up to all that ear hustlin’

tumblr_mb75qzHBJs1qmfh3wi don’t know anymore.
i seriously don’t.
that “work wolf” saga put a lot in perspective for me.
it made me see that even when something is put in my life,
things just never seem to work out for me.

sooooo……

i hope that one day things will turn around for me
i hope this blog will bring me to higher heights
i hope i will meet a wolf on accident instead of searching so hard
i hope i’ll meet friends and not be betrayed by them
i hope i can open my eyes and thank god i’ve made it.

see i try to hold onto something.
i can’t be here to just be born to die.

…Maybe i’m being too optimistic about that?

tumblr_mb75smOBLU1qmfh3wbtw: i’m getting a raise.
i got one earlier this year,
but my boss recognized what a hard worker i am.
one of the vps alleged demanded i get a raise.
yay.

Author: jamari fox

the fox invited to the blogging table.

21 thoughts on “Faith With Works Is Dead (Well For This Fox Anyway)

  1. I know it’s hard to think positive and have faith when you’re in the battle of the storm but that’s when you need it the most. I hope things not only turn around for you but myself and anyone going through the it in the foxhole. I expect you to have the best of happy times since you have gone through the worst of dark times.

    P.S. Congrats on your raise, now if only they will give you a corner office with liar liar as your personal assistant as frosting on the cake. 😈😈😈

    1. Amen bruh. Spot on. I just watched a sermon with the pastor saying how you must be grateful & thankful to the Lord in the good AND bad. It’s something I wasn’t doing, and it spoke volumes when he said it. He also touched on prayer & how prayer works when you pray for not only yourself, but others. J, these times are tough, yes, but keep faith that Him & Him only will bring you through. Promise it gets better…

  2. I wish I knew what to say to encourage you, but I don’t have anything. Sometimes just being there to listen is good enough. We’re listening.

  3. Congrats on the raise well deserved. It’s always darkest before dawn so don’t despair. Morning is coming. And you have so many things to be thankful for. I remember when you were unemployed. You have come so far so stay the course. Sending prayers and positive energy.

  4. Jamari, I’m one of your biggest fans. I believe in your potential. Most importantly, I believe in who you are right now. I was hard on you in the earlier post because I know you’re an intelligent man. I am certain of this. You’re strategic in your actions (with WW), you’re strategic with your work life, and I think your calculated moves are impeding what should occur naturally.

    Lighten up. Stop overthinking things. Relax. Live your life authentically, without worry of others opinions. Do you.

    You know its amazing. Even in this post. You start off, “things just never seem to work out for me.” Then you end the SAME post with “I’m getting a raise…my boss recognized what a hard worker I am.”

    Like…..

    Bruh. Shift your perspective. Things are actually working out for you (remember unemployment?!!!). Focus on being a better JAMARI, and I promise everything else (love, career, finances, friendships) will fall into place….NATURALLY. You don’t have to force anyone else to appreciate it. You don’t have to force anyone to receive it.

    Your blog is popular because it’s the authentic you. Transfer that authenticity to your real life man. Focus on J.

    Blogger, writer, creative, fashinisto, intellectual. You have the ingredients. What you gonna do with em?

    Love.

    1. THIS>>>>> You gave a whole post on whats going wrong in your life and a few sentences on whats going right. My pastor says if you can shift your mind you can shift your life.

  5. You are preaching to the choir sir. I feel all of my life I was on the outside looking in. I never could really find anyone to relate to. I pray for the days where I can finally live instead to merely existing.

    Perhaps one of these days I can gain the strength to take better control of my life where my depression episodes are less frequent.

    But congrats on your raise though. It seems like outside of work wolf, matters at the job seem to be stabilizing.That’s something else to be grateful for.

  6. Jamari you are preaching to the choir. The last few weeks have been a testing time for me, my issues at work became bigger, I’m dealing with bouts of happiness and sadness, trying to accept my sexuality, tired of being lonely, and wanting a dude to just be there for me. It has been rough I feel so guilty because their are people that are in worse situations than me. Jamari again I’m sorry that you lost your parents and your best friend too. Jamari you are so strong and don’t let anyone tell you your not. You have through some tough situations in life and still making it. You and others up here have helped me so much. I have said it before and I’ll say it again thank you. We will be fine and congratulations on that raise you deserve it.

  7. It’s interesting that throughout this post you listed the things you hoped for and ended it with something you worked for.

    I think that’s the key right there, You can’t always have such high optimism about things you can’t control you can set yourself up for major lows.

    But if you excel at the things you do have control over then you can never be let down.

  8. Congrats on your raise bro! I’m going through the same things you are so my advice my suck because I’m kind of taking it day by day but still praying and still try a figure out what is next to making myself more happy. Unfortunately it doesn’t come overnight. Everything is a work in progress but feeling positive and optimistic usually makes stuff feel better and makes the day go by better! So keep that up! Negative energy will influence you to the wrong path and will change your energy!

  9. Jamari one thing I think can truly bring you joy is for you to promote your blog and make yourself more known as a blogger. I’m sure there are plenty of LGBT events who would love to see you face and your opinions on this lifestyle.

  10. What you have to understand Jamari is, you still have a lot of life ahead of you. You are not old, things do get better over time, and it happen all at once or it may take some time. I think the lifestyle puts pressure on men in general, which makes them believe they have to be exactly where to want to be before the age of 40.

  11. Great post. Positive thinking brings positive results. Cliché But true. And I think you have some great followers on this blog. You might have your whole support team right infront of you 😋.

  12. Congrats on the raise Jamari!
    It seems like a lot of us are going through some challenging times. Your post I realize speaks directly to a lot of us. I say to myself if they can fight through it then so can I. With that being said…….

    I hope the best for you Jamari and the Foxhole. We’ll be alright! 🙏🏾 😊

  13. I understand where you are but yoi also have to remember things happen when we are ready and able to actual deal with it. Have faith but not microwave faith meaning you will get things at the time you want them but when it’s your time to have it.

  14. Congrats on the raise. Among the craziness, something did get better. Remember to take it one day at a time and remain faithful.

  15. Wow you come across as very lonely… Do you have any siblings you can confide with? (If you don’t mind me asking)

    Because even though I have both of my parents, they are very ignorant towards my sexuality and since they were born in the baby boom generation (the 60s) they’re not really good with trying to understand what another person is going through (ESPECIALLY if they didn’t experience it).

    So I confide in my brothers (we’re all 90s babies). I came out to them a while ago and they were cool with it from jump-street. I speak to my younger brother all the time because we’re always together, he’s like my right hand. If I don’t have anyone, I can count on him. I don’t speak to him or my older brother about my sexuality or what goes on with this community because they don’t know much about being gay other than being attracted to the same sex, but I speak to them about pretty much everything else.

    I’m just saying in a nutshell, being alone all the time & being in your head can make you go crazy, I know it’s hard & you’ll hate to read this but finding somebody trustworthy to confide in can always help a bit.

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