social media is going to be the death of you

last night,
i was in my feelings (no drake) and tweeted:

“i can kinda see why people kill themselves because of social media”

one can lose themselves trying to get status on instagram.
if you aren’t witty enough for tweeting,
you’re sent to the twitter graveyard.
for the ones we admire,
it comes so easy to them.
it left me to wonder…

What does a healthy social media life look like?

is it…

– you aren’t ignored if you tweet/ig/pin/whatever
– flooding timelines with constant updates of your life
– pushing the limits of how naked you can go
– showing your audience you have the means to afford a better life
– doing whatever you need to do to have dms filled with potential sexual conquests

… because all of things lead back to “acceptance”.
folks just want to feel accepted out here.
you can do whatever in your social world,
but if no one shows you any kind of love,
you will literally die a social media pariah.

i don’t know if i’m one of the popular bloggers.
as of late,
i feel like i’m starting to be taken seriously.
i’m getting more feedback than i have ever have.
there are days i’ll tweet and get no response tho.
other days,
i feel like a “real life blogger”.

the real bloggers can legit tweet:

kjdkjqbdoqudebqjldbq

…and get about 100 retweets in about 2 minutes.
on my “emo” days,
i’d be like…

“What do I need to do to get “that” kind of love?”

that’s why some folks get suicidal due to social media.
like it or not,
no matter if it’s apple or andriod,
they rule everything at the moment.
we’re so connected to the entire planet with just one phone plan.
there is a rush of endorphins that come when strangers “like” you.

“my chicken wings from the chinese spot got 100 likes.
i belong!”

“i was grindin in my underwear and got 25,000 views.
i’m alllllllllllll the way poppin boo”

it’s easy to become a “fan” of a relative nobody.
like a legit nobody.
alla that seems like a healthy social media life.
if folks aren’t living vicariously through you:

Forget it.

*if you’re feeling suicidal,
please call the national suicide hotline:

Call 1-800-273-8255
24 hours every day

Author: jamari fox

the fox invited to the blogging table.

13 thoughts on “social media is going to be the death of you

  1. I’m surprised you haven’t figured this out yet J! Well maybe you have and just may not want to yet, but People are more likely to connect with someone they can visualize, remember people have NO idea what you look like lol alot of bloggers that blow up have a face thier followers can put with the content see, they may not post themselves OFTEN but they do let thier followers see the person behind the blog every once in a while, It may be the next step in reaching a higher audience, not trying to force or rush you, just giving food for thought

      1. True, I’m jus trying to think from all angles, I guess social media fame is like the lottery, it’s hard to hit, does wonders for some, but is the doom of others, either way just trust and have fun throughtout YOUR process

  2. Thank god I do not live my life through social media. I would go crazy having to keep posting my every move.

    1. And THAT is why so many people, especially the Insta-thots (male and female), burn out so fast. They do too much too fast, constantly trying to outdo the next person(s). Then they have to turn to the last resort to remain relevant..onlyfans or justforfans. smh

      Some parts of your life you need to keep private. Posting pics of your family, significant other, etc., is something I don’t feel is needed. It gives nutjobs/stalkers/shit-starters an open door to start trouble/drama unnecessarily.

      1. Bruh, this! That’s one of the reasons why I post very little. Me & my husband both agree that if you want to see pics of us – you come to our house. Enuf said!

  3. I follow your blog because you have a clear, unique voice. You speak your mind and it’s usually opinions that are sound and mature, emotionally literate. Remember don’t look at what the attention other “influencers” and blogs get cause you never know the mess they find themselves in trying to stay relevant. All press Is NOT good press. People notice you and they’re watching know that. Be encouraged and know that the people who continuously tune into your site are here for YOU not because you bought followers or paid for likes or clicks. Xoxoterrace

    1. ^awww thank you xo.
      i appreciate your support and i love your comment.
      i grew the foxhole organically and even tho it’s a slow journey,
      it’s one that has made me grateful how far i’ve come.
      it’s comments like this that let me know i’m not being ignored,
      even if my insecurities make me feel so.

  4. You’ve grown the foxhole one post at a time and maintained your integrity while doing it. That in itself is an accomplishment. Yes it’s grown and yes you have more to do but that’s all part of growth and your journey. Sure people get likes and seek out acceptance thru social media but who are they bh the post. I came across a model the other day who ppl think is perfect in looks and physique but the post that day had him covered and said “beautiful angel…deep depression”. I remember years ago he had this procedure done to stop hair from growing and have a clean look but here this perfect guy (so social media deems) yet he’s deeply depressed. Muscles and good looks don’t make a person happy when inside they have issues or demons that seemingly are trying to take them out. Life is a journey and we all have purpose and that doesn’t entail the approval of others to be happy. No person, place or thing can complete me if I’m already broken. It can only be a band-aid. Unfortunately, we’ve gotten it twisted. Love is not based on a like or 6pac. If we focus on improving us and spending time with us, not social media…we’ll be happier. Your season is coming…be ready. Real talk. Angie Stone…”No more Rain”

  5. Q: What does a healthy social media life look like? A: There’s no such thing.

    People look at me like I’m a three-horned unicorn when I tell them I don’t have social media. I’m not interested in babysitting apps just to upload shit no one cares about. I have self-confidence. I know I’m intelligent. I know I’m funny. I know I’m attractive. I know that in this vast universe that there’s no one else like me. I don’t crave anyone’s validation because I validate myself. I like and follow myself. I’m in competition with MYSELF.

    People use social media to size themselves up with others. They’re killing themselves over lack of likes, seeing “friends” so-called happy relationships, trips, and accomplishments that they don’t think they measure up to. It’s all make believe. These people don’t even look like they do offline and even when they do something is lacking. I doubt the sexiest attentionistos have the personalities to keep the average person interested in them longer than 90 seconds.

    Bullying is out of control on social media. Children and teens have ended their lives over the things people have posted on their pages. As someone who was bullied as a youth, that shit breaks my heart. I only had a handful of bullies, but these kids today have thousands.

    I was never into social media from the rip. Giving away my privacy doesn’t sit well with me, nor does sharing the movie that is my life free of charge. I’d rather go for a walk at lunch instead of sitting on Facebook. On dating apps, I’ve blocked guys who pry and ask if I have IG because I know their motive. I’m sure people from my past wonder what I’m up to, but that’s none of their business, I couldn’t care less about them. The people who matter have my number.

    I wouldn’t spit on social media if it caught fire, nor would I shed a tear. Although the day it disappears will be a frightening one. Be prepared for the digital apocalypse. I know I am.

    Like Sade said, this is no ordinary love.

    People need to unplug.

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