so i had my first therapy appointment just now.
Am I supposed to feel this way?
let me explain…
i cried close to the end.
i’m crying now.
there is a lot of things i have been holding onto deep inside.
some things i’d probably never share with the foxhole.
he was nice.
an older white wolf.
he actually looks like the guy in that ^above picture.
he allowed me to speak and get it all out.
during certain parts,
he would interject with his feelings on things.
one thing he didn’t like when i said:
“I feel stupid for feeling this way…”
he didn’t like that i called myself stupid.
i feel stupid for making mistakes and essentially being “human”.
in this community,
you aren’t allowed to make mistakes or be less than perfect.
i did feel like molly from “insecure” talking to her therapist.
even tho she was totally stubborn,
i let him into my inner forest depths.
he wasn’t black or gay,
he didn’t say much,
and let me do all the talking.
i guess i was expecting more breakthrough,
but it was our first meeting.