as i lay in bed in my stomach ailing stupor last night,
i was able to do a lot of thinking.
when you can’t sleep,
and you’re in tremendous pain,
it produces a lot of much needed “me” time.
i have been thinking of a mental vacation for awhile now…
i have been wanting to shut down my phone,
turn all my devices to silent,
and just staying quiet for a while.
as of right now,
no texting or phone calls.
i’m emotionally drained and in need of a break.
since i cannot take a vacation anytime soon,
i think the next best option is to remove myself from my current surroundings.
mentally and emotionally,
that is.
when i have stupid money like i’m destined,
i will own a place i go to get away.
it will be my “side den”.
i will take that time to focus on me an what’s important.
for a while,
i’ve been so focused on others,
that i began to lose myself in the process.
which is why i am now here and feeling the way i do.
since march starts tuesday,
i’ll take this as a “refreshing start to a new fox”.
i’ll do some reading,
recharging,
repackaging,
and reaffirming the life i truly want.
i started reading up on meditation and affirmations.
i even started a new vision board with the help of a good friend.
i may go a week,
or two,
maybe even a month,
but i just want to separate myself from the outside world.
everyone needs to go invisible mode for a while.
i’d like to think of myself being here:
my mental health and sanity needs this.
oh…
the foxhole will be updated.
duh.
i plan on being emotionally open as i unwind.
lowkey: all artists vanish when they are creating/working.
they either live in the studio or in their trailer.
don’t be scared to just take some “me” time.
let people know,
but politely distance yourself for your well being.
This gave me chills, my eyes got watery i really need time to myself as well just really need space from the world as a whole. Work school, family the lack of genuine friendships. I understand Jamari 💯💯
What that saying? It been a long over-due o something.
But yea I can imagine you being mentally exhausted, creatively exhausted, just everything exhausted. So you take your mental vacation and try to relax the best that you can, but I totally agree with Angela tho. You should give yourself a stayaction or a stay-away trip
I was where both you and Angela were about an hour ago.
All the emotion of anger and sadness builds up that the only thing I can do is the ugly cry.
Because of that
I plan to take 10 minutes out of the day everyday this week to meditate.
^i started doing it every morning now.
I try to do a guided mediation before I put my clothes on for work.
so far it has been helping.
YouTube is really good for stuff like this.
keep it on up zen.
I’m not sure if you work weekends, but you might need to have a small weekend away (leave Friday night and come back on Sunday evening) and explore a city for a day. I realized this a little while back, but been taking action towards the travel aspect of life recently. I learned that my friends in the city were awesome, but they had their own adult lives to live. I couldn’t be all up under their business all day, and that having a little adventure for yourself is beautiful. Literally two weeks ago, I had a emotional breakdown – sobbing and weeping, couldn’t pick myself up off the floor, crying for help – I felt alone and that I was in a space I couldn’t be free and be me. I took that as a revelation and stopped limiting myself to NYC (Bronx, Harlem, and Brooklyn) people and spaces. I utilize tumblr, and I’ve gone out of town to meet new friends and acquaintances, explore their local spots, and realized the air is different and necessary to see the growth in me (what I can or can not manage.)
Take your time and I’ll be tuning into your updates dear.
^angela…
your words touched me.
thank you for sharing.
i am where you where two weeks ago.
crying,
sadness,
and broken hearted by recent events.
i had my emotional breakdown last week.
I’ll talk about it soon in an entry.
thank you for sharing and please keep commenting.
I heard Maya Angelou say years ago that she takes one day where she does not answer her phone and does not talk to anyone and just goes and do something for herself. I used to try to do this but that was before cell phones became so popular. It is hard as hell to get away from it all now. Since you are in the NYC area, I would suggest that you look up this place call Spa Castle, it like going on vacation for a few hours without the travel and for about a $100 bucks, its like $65 to get into the NYC Manhattan location, and you can spend the rest on food and drinks, you can act like you are in luxurious resort. Also you can catch great deals on Groupon that cut the cost in half. They have rooms where you can sweat and detox, also they have a men only area that you have to be totally nude in, so if you are shy be warned, but you dont have to go in there. If you do be ready to see some nice eye candy lol. They provide you with uniforms, and you can pay extra for massages. You will leave feeling like a new person, once you sweat and detox and your skin will look and feel amazing. This is one of the best things you can do, take a book and just relax, drink a detox mix like apple cider vinegar, or lemon juice or some detox tea right before you go as well as drink a lot of water. You can bring a bag and sneak you some healthy snacks and a bottle of water if you dont want to pay for their food which can be pricey. Once you go once, you will be hooked. It will bring you back into balance.
^researching that NOW.
thanks t!
Great advice Tajan, this would be perfect for you J, mini getaway without out leaving new york. If you can do it I say book a night at a hotel after you leave the spa just to really pamper yourself.