3 mistakes while dating gay

in order to date jamari fox,
you need to be:

– aggressive
– loyal
– private
– have common sense
– a subtle air of “i’ll fuck you good”
– sexy (to me)

i don’t care if you work out 22 hours a week,
or you’re a nerd who has a lifetime subscription to “crunchyroll”,
those are the things that move the meter for me.
so yesterday,
i was laying in bed,
and was thinking about dating in the gay world.
it’s a complicated world that i spent too much time trying to find a wolf to love me.
for some,
there isn’t a lot of that.
they go out and can meet someone almost instantly.
others have a hard time getting noticed.
from my own experiences,
and even observations of others,
these are some big mistakes while trying to date other males…

1 – To have all the sex

many gays brag about how much sex they are getting.
they aren’t getting loved; they’re getting fucked.
if it’s not by a roster on “jack’d”,
it’s due to attending a sex party in almost every city.
when you peel back those layers tho,
they are also very much alone or connected to other toxic males.
i’m seriously not impressed with anyone’s sex life.
i can see a version of your sex life on pornhub.
if sex is all you have to offer…


i’m impressed with gay males who can be in a relationship for more than a year.
with those types,
they’ll get in a relationship and the door is still wide open to fuck other people.
if you aren’t someone who can do all that:

PLEASE DON’T DO IT

if you are looking for something serious,
then do that.

2. Not being “masculine”

you are fem or in-between,
but you think you need to be super masculine to attract someone off social media.
that needs to stop.
whoever you are,
be that unapologetic version.
i’ve seen fem males with super pull in these forests.
they be pulling the same masculine males you want to fuck you between 11pm to 3am.
now there is a difference between:

Naturally masculine
“Try hard” masculine

if you have to act masculine,
or a version of what being masculine is,

then you aren’t masculine.


everyone’s definition of “masculine” always varies.
you know what’s feminine to me?

Males that play hard to get

that LEGIT turns me tf off.
i like a 50/50 chase and if i feel i’m giving more effort,
and he is acting like it’s a privilege to even be in his presence,
i’m writing you off as someone who likes dick too.
even if you are a wolf,
you’ve showed me what you’ll be like in a relationship.
a fuckin’ divo.
hard pass.

3. You’re looking too hard

you know who wants you.
it’s an energy.
folks that are attracted to you give off a certain scent.


that’s why its important to stop looking because you’ll know.
be your best self and live your best life in the mean time.
you could randomly meet someone just by going into cvs to pick up toothpaste.
you don’t make your daily mission to wake up everyday in hopes of meeting someone.
you just go tf outside with no expectations.
your job on earth is to be you.
whether that’s being the hero,
anti hero,
or the villain is up to you.
i’ve learned that confidence is what gets you pull in whatever role you play.
you have to be comfortable with yourself and accept all that you are.
within all your flaws and lack,
you always gotta stay in the mind frame that you’re the baddest to ever do it.
jackals can sniff you when someone is insecure and easy to manipulate.
if you spend every waking moment searching for someone to love you,
you’ll be disappointed that you keep attracting idiots.
if the rona taught me anything,
it was that life can switch up without any warning.
just because you’re “here” today doesn’t mean you’ll be in the same spot next year.

Only if you choose to be.

i hope that was able to help someone.
if any of the foxholers have any tips/mistakes,
please share with the group.

Author: jamari fox

the fox invited to the blogging table.

5 thoughts on “3 mistakes while dating gay

  1. Great post Jamari….Me and my cousin discuss this topic alot and still we are left with…Huh?
    It’s just alot of work bro. Too many opportunities to hook up and get ass or dick. Let’s not even start about the being faithful part smh.
    You might be looking for a relationship and meet the “right guy” for you, but it turns out he is not looking for a relationship.
    Then your like “oh fuck” it gets discouraging after awhile. As each day goes by your getting older and start wondering will it ever happen…a caring, loving relationship.

  2. Has been a problem for me. If I’m really feeling your personality I generally want to wait for sex. If I’m not attracted to you sexually I’m getting the dick ASAP. The problem is when I try to connect with gay guys on a deeper level they get mad or try to trick me. I’m a grown man you can’t trick me into having sex. I’ve been called names by guys I was actually into because I wouldn’t have sex with them within hours of meeting them. I even had an HIV positive guy call me fat because I wanted to go on a date with him instead of fuck. I pushed back and told him that shit was unacceptable and I didn’t deserve it. That’s when he told me he thought I didn’t want to sleep with him because he was positive. I didn’t know he was positive until he told me. Here I am showing interest in him as an individual and not just a sex object. He’s lashing out because apparently all he wanted to be treated as was a sex object.

  3. I go back and forth with the whole relationship shit. Some days I wouldn’t mind a romantic friend and other times I am seduced by the idea of being single forever. Being single forever doesn’t scare me at all. What does freighten me is not being able to stand on my own two feet. Always needing someone there for validation, people don’t deserve that kind of power over people. More than anything though if love does decide to come my way I hope I am in the right place to receive, recognize and reciprocate it. I hope that I remember to be patient with the love and not lose my self in the relationship.
    If I had to give the foxhole some advice it would be to make sure that respect is the foundation for any relationship y’all decide to embark on. Once the RESPECT HAS LEFT YOU SHOULD FOLLOW SUIT.

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