White Teeth

white-19of course,
of all the days,
my barber decided to be sick.
not having your barber is the worse.
you grow to appreciate his way of doing your hair.
i needed to find someone in the shop that could create the same masterpieces.
i looked like a wolf.
literally.
i had insane amounts of hair on my face.
i saw him motion to me that he was free.
i guess this wolf will do…

he was short,
kind of stocky,
dominican,
older,
and had these pearly white teeth.
he also had a bluetooth in his ear.
i didn’t know people still did “that”.
then it hit me.
it was strong too.
made my nose flare up….
tumblr_mijv4e9GCp1rhp8imo1_500… this dude’s breath smelled like dookie on the rocks!!!!
worst part was,
he was talking on the phone.
i think i broke records today for “longest time of inhale”.
i tried to put my hand to my nose.
even my phone.
i caught myself about to throw up.
when he finally reclined me to use the razor,
i damn near gasped like i was underwater for close to 5 minutes!
i know he was looking at me like “WTF”.
i would have returned the favor.
when he was done,
i was satisfied with his work.
$15.00.
i gave him a tip:

“use altoids”

naw i’m playing.
i tipped him 5 and was on my way.
did he not know his breath was bad?
it made me wonder about my breath.
i would hate to be talking to someone and violating their whole nostril situation.

bad-breathat least he had white teeth?

Author: jamari fox

the fox invited to the blogging table.

7 thoughts on “White Teeth”

        1. ^see that’s a good question!
          I’d have too,
          but how would they react?

          how do you tell someone they have bad breath tho?

          “hey is the little man in your mouth taking a shit or something?”
          “hi. your breath smells like you were chopping on dookie covered burgers. do you think you could tell them less dookie sauce next time?”

  1. Dayum J you had my interest at “Dominican” and then the “pearly whites” I was like OH MY…stocky is not my usual but Dominicans get a pass if they are cute, not to sound shallow just have a weakness for DR men. Stank breath OH NO, it’s a wrap..close the whole damn store. But how does he not know? Maybe he is missing a rack of teeth in the back. I’m just saying…..

  2. It is my belief that people know when they have bad breath. How can you not know?! You will NEVER catch me with bad breath! I stay with a pack of gum and or mints with me. Good oral hygiene is a big must with me when talking to anyone. The offer someone a peice of gum or mint trick works wonders!

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