i can come off really guarded in person.
it’s nerves tbh.
it is all nervous energy in how i come off to other people.
when alcohol is in me,
my inhibitions can help me relax but i don’t want to become an alcoholic.
weed has only made me paranoid af.
honestly…

Continue reading “the first step in a prison break is admitting you want to break out of prison” →

this morning,
i woke up morning feeling oddly relaxed.
as of late,
that has been happening.
usually i wake up with a ton of anxiety,
but it felt like something was lifted off my spirit.
i been meditating every day,
which has been helping,
but ever since i started taking…
Continue reading “getting high without getting high (anxiety)” →

…just getting home,
that’s where.
foxhole,
i’ve been working some long ass hours these last 2 days.
ima have to turn into bed in a few because i’m tired af,
but i just wanted to font…

Continue reading “it’s 10:30pm, do you know where jamari fox is?” →

it started getting bad like a few weeks ago.
i’ve been playing it off pretty well.
i’m still dressing fly,
and my skin has never looked better,
but i’ve been dealing with a lot deep down inside.
it’s easy to wear a mask when you’re feeling like shit underneath.
bad enough,
i’ve been “sick” af too…

Continue reading “i’m riddled with anxiety, but at least my skin is still clear” →

i never use to have anxiety before.
crazy,
but i remember when it all started.
it was with this one demon boss that i had back in like 2009.
before,
i’d go to life with regular butterflies in my stomach.
after her crazy ass,
once my anxiety would reach it’s maximum…

Continue reading “anxiety keeps my head in a toilet” →

“if we don’t do something about this,
this can kill you.”

thats what my doctor said to me this morning.
i guess left and i are not too far off from bad news.
so the results of my doctor’s visit is as follows…
Continue reading “The Hall of Mirrors (20)” →