Star Fox Is Now Amongst The Stars


i wrote the title last and literally busted out in a tears.
this was absolutely painful for me to write this morning.
my heart is broken.

he made me start this website.
he even helped me come up with the name.
he knew i loved athletes,
loved to write my feelings,
and had so much to say.
i was terrified to do it at first,
but without him pushing me to jump,
i wouldn’t have done this without him.
i’m glad i listened.
he always said to me:

“jamari stop being so scared.
just do it.
have faith.
go with the flow.”

he had so much faith.
i admired him for that.
i have replayed everything we have spoken about throughout these years.
he was someone who knew me.
my feelings,
when i was sad,
what made me happy.
he saw me for me.
he could break me down and be on point.
he always saw that light within me that i never saw within myself.

“the world needs to know the you i know.
they would love you so much as i do.”

star fox passed away.
he was taken from me so tragically.
so senseless.
so random.
i’m still in shock.
i think i have no more tears,
yet i find more when i see his face.
he was someone that i shared many of his adventures on here.
i can’t believe i am even writing this entry about my friend today.
the last one i will ever write.
he was a brother to me.
now he is gone and i don’t know what to do with myself.
i miss him already.
i didn’t even get to say good bye.
i don’t think i will ever meet anyone in this lifestyle like him.
that’s what hurt me the most about this.
he always encouraged me to be as fearless as he was.
let go and go with the flow.
when someone did me wrong or hurt my feelings,
he told me to forgive them and let god handle it.
he was my safety net in this lifestyle.
hell, life in general.
as far as i’m concerned,
the “friendship” bar is now set really high.

i wrote this entry in twenty different ways.
crying each time i did.
i think i feel satisfied with this one.
there’s not much left to say but:

“thank you for being my rock,
my support,
and my true best friend.
hell someone i would call a brother.
i will continue to do this for you.
i love you so much and will miss you tremendously.
please stay within my heart.”

rip star fox.

20 thoughts on “Star Fox Is Now Amongst The Stars

  1. I’m so very sorry to hear for your list. This made me get teary eyed. I’ll be sure to hug my bro extra tight the next time I see him. You’ll pull through.

  2. I know I am late but sorry for your lost, the beauty of it all is now they are in a better place and you got the opportunity to reconcile your friendship before it was too late. Now you’ll have your own personal guardian angel watching over you.

  3. Ouch!!!! Jamari.. Sorry to hear about this…..Place your arms around yourself tight and squeeze….. I know these are just words.. but I wish you some comfort….

  4. I am so sorry for the loss of your beloved friend.Reading through the posts about him I can see he struggled.I can see he was never really valued or appreciated by his family. Thankfully he had your love and support. I know right now you are in so much pain but in time you will remember the good times.You will smile when you think about the copy and paste near disaster he called you about two weeks:) You are in my prayers Stay strong

  5. I feel really bad that this happened to you. I didn’t even know him and I feel like I’m getting a little misty eyed. He seemed like a really great person from what you wrote about him. I know exactly what it feels like to lose a best friend. Stay strong, Jamari. If you ever, ever need anything, the foxhole is here with open arms and shoulders to cry on. This too shall pass. ♥

  6. I am so sorry you lost your best friend. I know you’re hurting right now, but know that God can keep you. He really can. Find solace that he is in no more pain.

    p.s. Keep up the good work. You may not know it, but ur a blessing.

  7. I am simply in shock, this seems so surreal. OMG J, man Im so sorry for your loss. Just know that you are gonna get through this. I lost my BFF who was like my brother over a decade ago, and I was so young at the time, I thought I would not get over it, but time heals. Its your duty to now pick up the torch and reach somebody else and make a impact on them as he made on you. My only mistake was not talking about my feelings and the impact that it had on me, please learn from me and find you a support group to deal with your grief, I have got over the hurt all these years later but the pain still runs deep, but i think on all the good times and I smile and it warms my heart on those days when I think I cant go on. Just remember a part of him will always live in you.

  8. I’m sooooo sorry for your loss Jamari. I will keep you and his family in my prayers

  9. Jamari, My prayers are with you and star fox! Shine Bright!

    Look for the rainbow in every storm,
    Fly like an angel heaven sent to me
    Goodbye my friend,
    (I know your going searching although I can still feel ya here)
    It’s not the end,
    (You gotta keep it strong before the pains turn into fears)
    So glad we made it, time will never change it no no no

  10. (opens arms and hugs you tight)

    Wow, We love you Jamari, I am so sorry to hear that. We know that you guys loved each other and that you were truly brothers. Nothing will ever take him memories and the good times away so cherish them. Continue to do what he inspired you to do, continue letting people get to know the awesome person you are. God always has a plan for our lives, his was fulfilled.

    The Foxhole Salutes Star Fox, may his memory live on forever here.

  11. MAN I am so sorry to hear about the passing of your best friend. I can’t imagine what it’s like to lose someone so close. Someone who knew you on a personal level and supported you. You had a friend that is rare to find these days. All I can say is time heals all wounds and with death, the pain never really goes away. Just know that he now with you in spirit and that is one thing you should be excited about. Not to mention you have family here on the blog. We not be here in your physically presence but we are still here for you!

  12. Wow I’m over here teary-eyed that was really beautiful what you wrote paying tribute to his life…and he will live on through you…i’ve come to the conclusion when a person touches our lives so deeply and then they leave us tragically their imprint they left behind will be felt through the ages, until we meet them again on the other side…may the LORD bless and keep you and his family during this tragic time….

  13. I’m so sorry for your loss Jamari. My prayers are with you and his family. He was sent to be the person in your life that helped guide you on this path called life. He’s done his job, and now he’s going home. Just remember all the memories you guys have shared with each other. Those memories are absolutely priceless.

  14. I’m sorry. It hurts to lose a friend, especially the close ones. Friends come in and out of our lives in many different ways, but to lose one to death is life changing. This is why we should treat people good when they are living. You never know when god may call them home.

    My prayers are with you.

  15. Jamari, please accept my condolences. When I lose loved ones, I remind myself that tomorrow is not promised to anyone and that we must live each day fully, doing our very best. I’m also reminded to cherish those special relationships and time with loved ones. May you retain fond memories of Star Fox and may all of his lessons to you continue to gird and guide you.

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