let’s say i’m out and about,
minding my business,
and manz comes up to me and starts kickin’ his interest my way.
it could be in the streets,
at an event,
or in dms.
he is my type and i’m hella interested.
he takes me out and i end up really feeling this dude.

He ain’t NOTHING I’ve ever kicked it with before.

we go on more dates,
conversations are dope,
my interest intensifies and we finally have sex.

SEX IS MIND-BLOWING

…and,
AND,
the mofo calls and wants to see me again.
so i’m open in all ways but he looks like this…

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*This is what i wrote in my private journal.
It’s been reworded for the foxhole tho.
I’m just writing my feelings out right now.
vent incoming.

i saw ^that quote earlier and it stuck with me.
“what if it all works out?”
how do you truly entertain a thought when you feel things won’t work out?
like,
we are all master creators.
we have made magic with just our thoughts and having faith.
i got to thinking tho and…

Continue reading “HOW DO YOU HAVE FAITH THINGS WILL WORK OUT WHEN THEY USUALLY DON’T?” →

i know you are angry at how you’ve been treated.
you’ve been holding that hurt in for a long time.
i’m angry too because it has happened to me countless time.
you know what bugs me?

People stood by as you were treated like shit and did nothing.
No one defended you or supported you.

it fuckin’ sucks.
this entry goes out to those who…

Continue reading “TO THOSE WHO DIDN’T GET THE LOVE AND SUPPORT THEY NEEDED <3” →

when i first got to this country,
i was picked on pretty badly at my first school.
my mother enrolled me in a private catholic school.
she thought it would be better than being at a public school.

BOY WAS SHE WRONG.

i was jumped,
spit on,
and beat up for simply existing.
i was called rubber lips and made fun of for my features,
which made me hate my lips and my nose.
don’t even get me started on being called a sissy.
i wasn’t picked on for being “white”,
but i was different than my other classmates.
my accent was pretty thick and i cried easily.
even though it was a majority white school…

Continue reading “I THINK SOME PEOPLE WHO DATE OUTSIDE THEIR RACE ARE SUFFERING FROM TRAUMA” →

i was talking to someone about “the devil’s wear prada” the other day.
meryl streep portrayed miranda priestly so iconically.
my friend said:

“I loved the movie and hate it at the same time.
The movie portrays everything wrong with corporate America.”

…and thats when i was slapped into reality.
when i sat down and really thought about it…
Continue reading “THE DEVIL IS IN THE DETAILS” →

i’m not the popular one.
i’m not the onlyfans star.
i’m not the muscled-down fantasy for the gays hopes takes dick.
i’m not the one who gets his dick sucked.
by that,
i mean i’m not the one that people promote shamelessly.
i’m often ignored and wonder if i’m enough.
i’m not the one who people think of first for invites or vip spots.
it would fuck with me real heavy.
i thought about it like this…

Continue reading “I’M NOT THE ONE WHO GETS HIS D*CK SUCKED (yet)” →