Beep Me “69” or Call Me On My Cell Phone…

i couldn’t sleep.

it didn’t help that i read the 40+ comments to that last entry as they came in.
the whole night i thought about the rapper.
i thought about things he told me and things he spoke about.
i thought his life, his decisions, and his outcome.
as big as his list is,
his life isn’t where he needs it to be.
he is still trying to be taking seriously as a rapper.
he never had a serious job in his life.
how he makes money is a mystery.
he got frustrated over something trivial.
not to mention, he came in and dropped his coat on the floor.
no apartment or car.
i felt like i was in high school again.
after school.
he was the “pre baller wolf that came over to get tutored“.
i was the “geek who sat in the front of the class“.
he seems to just be going through life without a solid plan.
he is not a “man”.
my “man”.
he has actually dated a couple foxes in the past.
hell, i watched him fuck one’s brains out raw like it was a top rated myvidster flick.

“oh daddy! oh shit nigga! i love this dick!”
“________________” – no reply from him.

his pipe did the replying and judging from how he fucked him,
it loved him….


(lowkey: his ex is FINE as hell.
caramel, nice body, and looks like something being reblogged on tumblr.
hell, he could be on tumblr….)

but, i had to wonder what “dated” meant to him exactly?
was it someone he was having consistent sex with?
someone with a fat ass that was “his“?
did they even have a conversation?
one thing he told me yesterday:

“jamari, i like you because you listen to me.”

is this new to him?
in a world where sex is easy,
people cum and go,
and you are only as good as your last fuck i started to wonder…

Are we just a “number“?

as i spoke to the rapper yesterday in my crib,
he could not stop texting on him phone.

“what are you doing?” – i asked.
“nothing just replying…”
“to who?”
“some nigga i met that wants to fuck…”

he proceeded to show me the message from some name:


he showed me his whole list.
a lot of names.
some i heard of in the industry.
i also saw a ton of numbers.
did they mean nothing to even get logged in his phone book?
people he honestly admitted he didn’t “know” or can’t remember how they met.

“i only reply to them when i’m horny.”
“that’s not nice!”
“all they do is talk to me about sex so….”
“so they don’t deserve a conversation?”
“yeah about how ima put this dick in their mouth?”

that sort of turned me on, i won’t lie.
…but, he was right.
every text in his phone was sexual or business.
there was no “how are you?“.
“is life treating you good?”
i was shocked to see a “hey!”.
it was all texts from hungry foxes asking:

“what are you doing tonight?”
“you are so sexy…”

then graphic:

“i miss that dick.”
“i really want to fuck you this weekend.”
“this ass is yours nigga you know dis.”

all with pictures and videos.
fingering their cakes.
jacking off.
the moans of his potential conquests he may fuck sooner or later.
wolves who wanted to “explore“.
foxes who were just so thirsty.
… and then i came across my name.
i actually made him type up something without “fuck” or “cum”.
(lowkey: he is a baaaaaaadddd speller and his regular text convo is rather banal.)
i was actually interested in the person.
he knows this.
this is why he texted me at 1 in the morning last night to tell me:

thank you for being you baby“.

no doubt at that fox’s house with a wet mouth on his penis.

i started to wonder about being taken seriously in this lifestyle.
i am not like everyone else.
is this is why i don’t fit in?
my past conquests never spoke to me like this.
i got dick pics,
but it was never a “come thru tonight” type of deal.
we always had conversations.
i won’t lie and say i never initiated the phone bone or the sext first.
but, they moved slow with me and i appreciated that.
they also respected me.
i look thru his phone and all i saw was flesh and fuck.
i saw the same characters i was attracted to,
but completely naked and just a number.
is it wrong to demand someone to take you seriously?
to have a conversation?
hell, to come over and just talk?
i’m all for sex,
but i like to take things slow in a world that likes to go very fast.
i think about the next 5 days.
everyone else seems to think about the next 5 minutes.
that bothers me sometimes because i only want to be taken seriously.

but, maybe serious is “out“.
jack off video complete with squirt “in“?
when it comes to how niggas view you in their phone list/book:

Are you just a human dildo/flesh light?

20 thoughts on “Beep Me “69” or Call Me On My Cell Phone…

  1. Yo Jamari, where do I submit an application to become your fuck buddy/friend with benefits??

    1. Full Name:_______________ __________

      – Address:____________ ____________________ ______

      – City:___________ State:__________ Zip:__________

      – Ethnic Background:_________ __

      – Dentures?:__________ ________

      – Height:____________ Weight:_____________ __

      – Waist Size:_____________ Chest/Bra Size:_______

      – Shoe Size:____________

      – Last Medical Screening Was On: __/__/__

      – Azz Size:
      Small:_____ Medium:______ Hand Full:______
      Big:______ “I Have One!”:_____ “You Can See It From The Front”:________

      – Are You…
      Married_____________ Single:____________ Engaged:__________
      Divorced:___________ __ (ask about our “dont ask, dont tell” program)

      – Dick Size (don’t lie!)
      Small________ Medium______Large___ _____ Whoa!______
      Is It…
      Clean Shaven?:_______ Bushy?:______ Bald?:______ Designed?:______ Braided?:_______

      – Can You Stay Out Late?___________
      How Late?:___________
      All Night?:_____________ _
      Several Days?:__________
      How Many?:____________

      – Do You Prefer Fucking Or Made Love To?:_______________
      How Often?:_____________ __

      – Do You Like Oral Sex?:_____________
      Give?:______________ __
      Receive?:___________ ____________

      – How About “69″?:______________ _

      – Do You Prefer, One on One?:______________
      Double?:____________ __ Group?:_____________ ____
      Football Team?:______________ __ Or “Guinness Book of World Records?”:____________

      – While fucking Do You…
      Faint?_______Hum?___ __Scream?_______Fart ?_________ __ Cry?_______
      Moan?________ Sweat?_________ Yodel?_________ Scratch?_________ Burp?______
      Whistle?_______ Just Lie There?________ Go To Sleep?____________
      Read The Paper?_______ Think of Someone Else?________
      All of The Above?_______

      – List Three (3) Positions You Like Best…

      – When You Cum, Do You:
      Scar One’s Back?_________
      Continue To fuck?_________
      Pass out?_________
      Eyes Roll In Back Of Head?_______
      Or Do You Just Hump Like Hell?_____________
      Other?:_____________ __

      – Method Of Fucking Preferred?…
      Fast?___________ Super Fast?_______________ Slow?___________
      All Night?______________ __
      How Many Times?:_____________ ____

      – Comments:___________ ____________________ __________ ________________

      – Give References. (Not Family Members)

      Name________________ __
      Name________________ __
      Name________________ __

      – If Application Is Approved,
      What Are The Charges? Free______ Per Hour________ Per
      Weekend________ Per Week_______ Other_______ Do You Accept Muff
      Burger Specials?___________ __ Blow Job Specials____________

      – Form Of Payment:
      Cash____ Check___ Money Order______ Wic Checks______ Food Stamps_____

      Or One Of The Following Major Credit Cards:
      MasterCard_______ AMEX_______ Visa_______ Discover______
      Sears_____ Macy’s_____ Diners Club_____ AAA_____ Shell Card______
      Pay Per Pump_______ (earn frequent pumper miles)

      ********A Special Note Pertaining to Oral Sex*********
      ==================== =================

      – Do You Like: A Spitter?___________ A Swallower?__________ ___ A Garguler?___________

      If Application is Approved, A Six (6) Week Orientation Course Will Be Required!!!
      Payments For Orientation Courses Will Be Taken Upon Arrival!
      Discounts Will Be distributed Depending On The Applicants Rating.
      Ratings Will Be taken By Our Highly Trained And Certified Personnel.
      Bonus Rating Points Can Be Earned By Style, Technique, Stamina And Effort.

      – Please State When u Will Start/And How Often You Will Be Calling:____________ _______

      – Applicants Signature:
      ==================== =

      X___________________ ___________ ____________________ ________________
      |Thank You For Taking The Time Out |
      |To Complete The Application, Review |
      |It And Make Sure Nothing Is Missing |
      |Feel Free To Add Anything Else I |
      |Should Know…Once Again Thank You. |

      1. ahahahahahahaahahahahahaha gooooooddddddddddd daaaaaaaaammmmmmmmmnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn wheres the part about the social security number and are you known by any other names part? lol

  2. I always wonder about the cute ballers, pretty boys on tumblr, porn stars who always seem to have a thirsty fan base following their ever move, how do they really feel, knowing that people want your dick, and to be seen with you because of your physical attributes and never want to see you as someone human with feelings. That must be a hard pill to swallow, many times these beautiful people are broken and empty inside and need the sex and the constant attention to cover other issues and insecurities. This seem like its the case with Mr. Good Dick rapper/wolf, he probably has been doing this for so long that he has forgot that you can actually get to know someone and they can like you for more than your dick.

    If you are around long enough to see it, many of the pretty girls and boys in school who were popular and got around sexually, when you see them years later, they are usually washed up and look bad.Men can whore themselves out and look old and haggard just like whored out women. Most of these pretty boys seem to always end up with average and many times way below average foxes and vixens after their time to shine has passed.

    It doesnt help much that so much in our lifestyle is based on the physical, and many of us dont realize that our good looks and hard bodies are going to fade as we get older, and all we will have left is a trail of fuck buddies and old memories. Dont sell yourself short whoring with everyone, get to really know yourself as well as someone who you are going to give your body too.

  3. Some people believe they have no worth, fuckers and fuckees alike, which is part of why they feel broken inside. Fucking just to be fucking is empty.

    Jamari you saw with your own eyes, him fucking a dude raw, the bottom loving that shit, and dude had no words, no connection other than with his dick.

    If that ain’t a human dildo then pig pussy ain’t pork.

    If fucking emotionally crippled strangers is appealing and you can afford the medications, go for it.

  4. im not in any guys phone at this point except my father. but when im interested in someone i tell them what i want from the start and if thats not what they want cool. i think sometimes actions is what makes a person able to either take you seriously or not. if all he had was hungry foxes coming at him for one thing he wasnt gonna try to get to know them anymore cause they already showed interest in one thing. raw sex thing was a little eye opening cause how many times does he do that? does he get tested?

  5. Nothing like having a good fuck buddy but you want one who shares the same values and morals as you. I rather just stay single and jack my dick off. My time will come. YBW is on point so I concur with him!

  6. Not at all. My best times/relationships are with kats I connected to deeper than my dack in their mouth/azz. In fact, I had the least amount of sex w/the dudes I ended up falling for – because I was attracted to their appearance, but got to know the person and that grabbed me. Of course they were both afraid of their feelings for me so it didn’t work, but that’s not the point today lol.

    If you want to be treated like a piece, then act like the rest of these xtube “stars.” But if you want to be seen as more, keep doing what you’re doing. I won’t lie & say it’ll be a harder road & things might get frustrating & lonely while you seek the right wolf, but in the long run it’s worth it.

    Of course, I’m also an advocate of a good fvck-buddy or two – they help pass the time well, and occasionally it becomes more…but don’t count on it *shrug*

    1. im starting to feel like i need a fuck buddy. lol i would say cuddle but im sure things would go futher cause i like to kiss. but its good to hear you say you were into the person you were dating personalty wise and not just sexual. thats why i was with my dudes even tho the sex was…meehh. but its not a road its a forever long cave you gotta walk through just to find a dude but i keep hearing if you dont look it’ll come to you.

    2. Yes it’s always good to have a fuck buddy. I am open to that because you can get plenty of sex without changing parents, especially if it’s good. I could recommend that to anyone who loves sex and is single.

      1. true. im not huge lover of sex but i do like it. i could just stay in a open relationship with my ps3. i might let other people play with him sometimes but im the main dude lol! ive never really had a fuck buddy or friends with benefits before.

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