The Power of Being Comfortable

tumblr_n0ktsz68Xy1rli00ho1_500you don’t know the power you have until someone is under your spell.
sometimes that power can turn the straightest of wolves out.
now not every wolf you meet will be gay.
some might be bi,
curious,
or “i only do this with you and no one else”.
the greatest power we all posses is making people feel comfortable.
allowing people to be themselves is something not many of us can do.
when you meet other animals,
and allow them to let down their guard,
that can be the most powerful weapon in your arsenal…

im not saying work wolf is gay.
i’m not going to label him with my assumptions.
i know that i have made him comfortable.
i think i turned him out and didn’t even touch him.
he makes some fucked up mistakes,
and sometimes i go off on him,
but it seems to make him get closer to me.

“how are you doing this jamari?”

well i’m not using mental trickery.
i didn’t do voodoo on him.
my witch doctor has been mia.
jk.
i just be me and let him see i’m not perfect.
sometimes i do/say things that make him mad.
just yesterday he told me:

“you say shit that pisses me off”

tumblr_lwitgzW1PS1qaf90uo8_r1_250…like he is so perfect?
he does the dumbest shit and makes bad decisions.
i have no issue calling him out.
if i’m going to be his friend,
like my other friends,
i’m going to keep it real.
guess what?
as mad as he gets,
he comes right back.

i’m learning its best to be “you” are with whoever you meet.
people like that.
they admire you for that.
they secretly crush on you.
you end up getting them comfortable and they start to reveal their secrets.
many “straight” animals have been turned out this way.
looks can get you in the door,
but they usually have little to do with it.
everyone is dying to be themselves with someone they can trust.

…Is that you?

Author: jamari fox

the fox invited to the blogging table.

17 thoughts on “The Power of Being Comfortable

  1. I’ve had conversations that have made me do a double take, like did I really just hear that. For some reason people get really comfortable with me, and wanna tell me their life story. As annoying as it can be at times, you hear some interesting things. There are a few guys on my company’s grounds crew that just get me horny as fuck. They are some of the finest latino dudes I’ve ever laid eyes on. Some are Rican, but most of them are Dominican. They’re very comfortable with me, and the stuff they say sometimes just makes me wonder what could/would happen if we were alone in a room. LOL
    All you have to do is make a person feel comfortable with you…and they will open up to you.

    1. Word I got these 3 Dominicans at my corner store (1 set of twins and their cousin) who flirt and fight for my attention constantly…. It’s to the point I have brought tons of friends along with me to the store to see if the notice it and they all agree … Idk… The cousin and one of the other twins are married with kids smh lol

  2. This is definitely true. This one str8 guy, he’s Puerto Rican too. We were both teenagers, he was real comfortable with me to the point where he allowed me to touch his thighs when he wore shorts and we hung out at the park during spring/summer, but his cousin was like “Ewww why you touching his thigh? That some gay shit” but funny enough he wasn’t bother by me touching his thighs at all. However, one time he wanted to play this made-up game with me where I played this pregnant woman and he’s the rapist (I know, I know). I stuff a pillow under my shirt and he pushed me on the bed and spread my legs apart. He was dry-humping me. And he watch constantly check the door because my mom was there in the livingroom. I definitely had an interesting life living in the projects.

      1. With this other str8 boy it was his first time being with another guy. He was so fucking obsessed with me like he would want to sit with me everyday and hold hands under the table and kiss when we’re alone, but I think what made him obsessed with me was because I fingerfucked him, but it wasn’t hot at all because he shited on my finger lmao. If your str8 friend ever decide to be intimate with you. Make sure you tell/teach him how to clean his booty. And if he does shit on your finger use lemon to take the smell out.

  3. “everyone is dying to be themselves with someone they can trust”

    Man that is so true. I am always that guy who people gravitated to & opened up to about everything. I never understood why me until I noticed myself opening up to others who I felt comfortable with.

  4. This!!!!

    I feel like this is the story of my life now, my wolf “friend” has told me a number of times he feels the kind of comfortable with me when he can let his guard down and just be himself. The way he jokes and interacts with me I know he doesn’t do with any of his girls or homies. As lame as it is it makes me happy I get a side of him most others don’t get. (But at the same time a little sad because these Vixens get his D 😩sigh)

    1. It not lame at all. It totally cool to see someone be real with you unlike with others because he finds you more special than others.

  5. Straight dudes can sniff us out. They do and say things that they can figure out if we play for the same team. I think that’s how the process starts, there are a few dudes at my job who are comfortable with me. I hear some of the guys talking to one another about females, sports, etc, but when it’s me our convos are different and they enjoy talking with me. Sometimes we will playfully flirt, talk to me about their problems, it’s kind of weird but I like it.

  6. I think its all about being natural, and people will feel inclined and comfortable to be around you. I think as long as you are authentic and genuine, people will be gravitated to that. It’s positive energy.

  7. Love this post… The work-wolf deal is getting quite romantic… I remember going thru that ordeal too…. Just remember you are still single and can go mingle…. Don’t wait for him… That one day he is going to break, In a good way, I hope

  8. Can anyone relate to my situation? I consider myself pretty much non-clockable, no one has ever questioned me about my sexuality. No rumors have ever surfaced that I’ve been talked about in that regard at work. But I seem to have alot of ackward moments with “straight” men while at work on a daily basis.

    A couple of examples there are a few guys I find really attractive, If I cut a sly glance in their direction their glancing at me too, you know the routine total eye lock for a few seconds then look away.Another situation I was making a cup of coffee this morning with a female co-worker in the break room, in comes another dude I find attractive, he greets us both, we greet him, she finishes making her cup and leaves out. It’s just him and I alone, silence, I continue making my cup. He leans in and reaches around my waist to grab the sugar, all in my personal space, uses it, then reaches around my waist again and puts it back on the counter in front of me. We never speak, he stands there stirring his cup. I finish making mine and leave.

    One more situation, A very very fine looking co worker I am always checking out is constantly in my eye stream it seems. I am friendly with is girlfriend who works in my dept. It seems everytime I look up he is walking past me with sexy swag. He never speaks to me only head nod’s, He very rarely looks me in the eye when she is around and he also is an eye glancer I spoke of earlier.

    Is this all in my head? Am I seeing things that aren’t there? I’m the first to admit I cant pick up on a signal to save my life, but I am always feeling ackward around these guys, like maybe there trying to figure me out. Maybe I’m reading too much into nothing at all.

    1. You know Paul…I get that eye glance thing a lot too. There is one guy on my job who I always catch looking at me, when he thinks I’m not looking. I was sitting on a bench outside one day at lunch, watching videos on my iPad, and I see him nearby. I look up, he’s looking…but quickly looks away. I get up to walk away, he’s looking again…but quickly looks down. All with a smile like, damn he caught me. Meanwhile I can’t get his fine lil’ ass to say no more than wassup to me. LOL
      Even if he’s with his co-workers and I’m talking to them, he won’t say a word. Just stands there and looks…with a smirk.
      I don’t believe we’re seeing things…I believe they may be interested but don’t know how to go about making their intentions known.

    2. @paulyrical I can never pick up on signs…. Even my own my mother notices ppl interested in me or staring me down… I have an eclectic style so… Sometimes I may have dope haircut or my sneakers or attire is why I think or assume ppl stare but I can never tell when a guy is interested… With girls it’s easy as hell… But with guys I always feel like…. I can’t tell…and I am afraid to even. Pursue…. I have tried to be daring and stare back but when it comes to that and even taking an extra glance…. I always ALWAYS chicken out … Smh

      1. JoFoxx…sometimes is you stare back at them they try to blow you up by saying why you looking at me?! LOL
        I’ve had that happen to me. I was like, dude you were looking at me so wtf are YOU saying?!

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