The Most Wonderful Time Of The Year

snow_mountain_by_mrainbowwj-d5ls7rai needed another day.
my sanity is starting to come back.
the fire inside me has been lit again.
hell my fur looks better and healthier.
i needed this,
and honestly

i’m happy.

 i did have an “overthinking” episode this morning,
but i took it as a bump on “reset mode”.
i have no complaints being away from that place tho.
it has been like a mini vacation.
my room has been a getaway.
i hardly treat myself anymore.
ive been too focused on the needs of others.

what they think?
will they get mad?
will they leave me?

oh no buddy!
that is completely done.

giphywork wolf has been blowing up my phone.

“where u?”
“you ok?”
“whats wrong?”
“talk to me”

i haven’t had the urge to hit him up.
he has been acting like an asshole as of late.
there have been many contradictions on his part.
i’m sure its wrong i don’t reply,
but i really don’t give a fuck tb-perfectly-h.

remember when i got the silent treatment?
remember when i hit him up and no response?
remember when he was on his fuck shyt?

well welcome to mine pineapple.
i hope he has a coat.
it gets chilly.
just last week i asked him something and he said:

“i didn’t think i had to tell you”

…but he always wants me to check in.
whenever he asks me a question,
i need to answer.
well guess what?
i don’t have to tell you shit either.
he’ll live until i return.
i may still keep him on freeze when i do.
i haven’t decided yet.

tumblr_lku301adLn1qivdq3o1_500so right now,
i’m getting everything in order.
i worked on my resume to start the hunt again.
i told ya’ll i wanted a life change.
there is a new challenging mountain path i want to try.

“i don’t give a fuck”

i hear its wonderful this time of year.

lowkey: if i can maintain this “feeling” for next year,
i will accomplish more.
i need to not slink back into old habits.
they need to die.
like a painful death.

Author: jamari fox

the fox invited to the blogging table.

10 thoughts on “The Most Wonderful Time Of The Year

  1. Yo go boy. Keep thinking positive Jamari and don’t let anyone take your happiness away from you, you deserve to have happiness and love in your life. Two questions I have for you though is. Are you going to give Mi a deadline like 90 days to find a new place to live since she has been there for a minute and still being disrespectful? Next question Did work wolf get that new job and what are you’ll going to do about all the sexual tension between you 2? I mean some of us up here can tell he is feeling you and even your pretty vixen friend saw that just saying.

    1. ^mi is rough around the edges.
      she has this “attitude”,
      but it’s easy to get her in check.
      it’s really how I react to her.
      i need to realize this is my spot.
      she needs to drop that “superiority complex” like she got her shit together.

      I don’t think I want anything with work wolf.
      he needs to grow up and learn to be a friend first.
      his version of being a friend is way different to mine.
      he gonna miss me if I ever decide to drop him.
      as for the job,
      he hasn’t said anything about it so I dunno.

  2. Love this Jamari! This change of attitude is exactly what the doctor ordered, I’m taking notes. It’s funny how the things you go through in life mirror mine in a way. I’m going through similar issues with my wolf “friend”, so I decided to put him him on Hold as well.

    1. ^working on it.
      still finding myself slipping back into old habits.
      a good “hold” never hurt anyone.
      hell people do it to us.
      why get mad when the tables are turned?

  3. I’m here for it and it’s about damn time you search for another job cause this job ain’t working for you clearly. As for work wolf, even tho I don’t know him, but I’m sick n tired of him already. But truth be told, if/when y’all decide to fuck already, you have my blessing, just make sure he put on a condom cause he’s a hoe.

  4. At this point, if you manage to get an interview from a place you like, I’d suggest to take that day off, it would be worth it, last time you couldn’t get a good time with work schedules, don’t let that stop you this time! It’s time!

  5. This is a definite sign that you need to GO. Immediately. When your job drains you in that way and you have an attitude every time you step in the building, it’s time to let it go. God has a way of making us uncomfortable when it’s time to make that move so either you make it now or get forced out.

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