i have been feeling emotionally needy for a while.
i’ve been feeling bad when i have to pull out my inner werewolf.
animals piss me off and i gotta regulate.
the problem is,
after i go off,
i feel bad afterwards.
why is this?
how could someone like me,
who didn’t take no shit before,
suddenly start awarding bad behavior?
well what i realized was simple…
i was spoiling others emotionally
i was having things done to me,
but when i had to put my paws down,
i was questioning how the other felt about it.
they did something to me and i was feeling like i did the wrong.
the fuck kinda logic….
it didn’t do nothing but turn kindness into weakness.
i felt frustrated and burnt out.
i noticed i was always going back with my tail between my legs.
well no more.
you know mi had the nerve to had an attitude with me this weekend?
well for one,
she is telling me how to act in my crib.
i slam a cabinet door and she is upset because i did it.
yet she leaves hair,
and all kinds of mess,
but i’m supposed to be okay with it.
i also noticed that when she does something wrong,
and i have to ignore her existence instead of going in,
that is she wants to act right and clean the crib.
the problem is that when i returning back to being nice,
she turns it all around back to “fuck shit avenue”.
she ran out of toilet paper and she expected me to refill the roll.
i’m always refilling the roll.
she spends her money on all kinds of shit,
but when it comes to wiping her ass,
she neglects that?
notice i said “she”.
jamari fox has about 8 rolls of toilet paper in his den.i was able to wipe my ass with no issues.
after the 4th day of an empty roll,
i had to ask her if she was going to refill it.
she finally did this morning.
work wolf is no better.
suddenly he has been forgetting his common courtesy.
we been talking and he would just vanish.
no “yo hold on” or ‘let me hit you back”.
just gone with no explanation.
so i’ll do me and give him space.
suddenly he is blowing up my phone.
i gotta retrain him on how to treat me.
he is getting too emotionally comfortable.
he knows i will always be there.
i won’t be making anymore fuss.
from now on,
i’ll step back and let him feel a draft.
a cold blast usually wakes a wolf up.
it isn’t easy putting your foot down once animals are comfortable.
you start wondering if they will leave.
you can’t worry about that.
i’m learning that no explanation,
but teaching with your actions,
is the best method in getting animals together.
you gotta make them see what its like when you bounce.
actions can speak louder than a cuss out.
lowkey: i’m tired of playing mister nice fox.
its time for a new role this season.