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How Can I Tell My Mama I Seen More Penis Than Fruit of the Loom?

“you know our child said he likes the sweet taste of penis?
i slapped him into next week.
he should be be back on thursday.”

we all love our parent’s right?
they raised us to be who we are today.
their teachings and guidance effects how we do things now.
yes there are some who raised themselves.
some who are not as close.
you know i feel you heavy,
but this entry goes out to the foxhole whose parents are in their lives.
who they can call up and say, “mom or dad… guess what?…”
the ones who don’t want to disappoint them.
the ones who are scared of them.
i had to ask…

Will you ever tell your parents you are gay?

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Old Pussies Equals New Dicks

“what would you say if i was dating ____________?”

she showed me the picture on her phone.

“____________ looks like your type.”

hell looked like my type.
i didn’t want to say that out loud tho.
she didn’t know how i got down.
______ was tall,
dark,
and handsome.
i thought it was a baller wolf.
_________ wasn’t shirtless,
but you could tell there was a nice body underneath the suit.
she told me that they worked together.
job title: supervisor.
every vixen and fox working there was interested.
________ was interested in her tho.
so what was the issue?

“that was once a woman baby!”

oh yes.
i was picture cat fished…
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I’m Happy! And I’m Naked! And I’m Colored! Gimmie A Hug!

if he was completely naked and wanted to give you a hug,
would you let him?
just a question.
well this naked gentleman wanted to give random hugs in a cali train station.
and well…

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Would You Put That Soft Slimey Thing In Your Mouth?

they say you have to kiss enough frogs before you meet your prince.
can i get a rough estimate?
seriously?
well on a totally different topic,
and side of the world,
people in japan are eating live frogs as sushi…

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So If I Trade In One Butt Cheek, Can I Get Those Eggs?

i had no food in my fridge.
i had jam,
but no bread.
cups,
but no juice.
thirst,
but no water.
you see where i’m going with this.
i decided to go to the store just now.
i picked up everything i would need.
things to cook,
breakfast food,
juice,
and snacks.
i’m at the register pulling items out my cart,
i’m already at 77 dollars.
i only had half the items out already.
i said a silent prayer.
do you know my bill was…