last night,
i couldn’t sleep again,
so i read over that “anti white” email conversation again.
“wtf” is all i could say to myself.
from the start and the end,
it was all very insulting and showed so much ignorance.
i remember when he use to comment on the foxhole…

this was many years ago,
like around 2012 or so,
he would lend a few fonts as the foxhole began to grow.
he would send emails about dl rappers and baller wolves and their alleged boyfriends.
one lived down the street from his home and he’d give me all the details.
i never posted that info because i’m an advocate on building trust.

(i’m not gonna out the rappers,
baller wolves,
or him.
i won’t stoop to that level.)

we lost touch throughout the years,
but to get an email like that yesterday was really surprising.
it’s like you never know what’s really going on with others.
you think they’re down for you and learning they never were.
you would think he would font:

“hey jamari!
i saw you were having trouble getting the site monetized.
maybe your site might be too “adult” or have other issues.
i use to work at an ad company so i have a bit of knowledge on the process.
let’s brain storm on how we can get you where you need to be.
what day is good for you?”

that’s how a professional would send an email if i had the means.
i would have sent something like that.
it was eye opening to see the turn out.
i really appreciated all those in the foxholers who left comments.
your defense for the foxhole meant a lot.
crazy enough,
i wasn’t even going to post anything yesterday.
after lamont’s shenanigans,
i was gonna stay in bed and watch “the bold type”.
during and after that email,
i had time.

 i want to thank him for the discussion he helped provide tho.
there is always something positive that comes from a negative place.
his nonsense woke me up and lit a fire under my tail.
i was feel low energy,
but he helped me see my place within the blogging forests.
the foxhole is capable of going to higher heights.
that email was just what i needed to get me together.

lowkey: i’d love it if the foxhole got monetized right after this too.
karma is one messy bitch.