hope is one of my bad words now.
its a passive word.

“I hope he will stop cheating on me.” He won’t.
“I hope this scammer will send me a video for 100 dollars.” No chance in hell.
“I hope this job will appreciate how hard I work.” They won’t.
“I hope I will become a millionaire.” You may or may not depending on God’s plan.

imo.
it’s a word formed in fantasy and dilutes reality.
for example:

A “hopeless romantic” is someone who keeps getting played over and over because they are confusing love with fantasy.

i have had hope for a lot of things,
especially when it came to other males interest that i wasn’t sure about.

“I hope this dude will finally see me the way I see him.”

…and years later,
i was still holding onto hope of a fantasy that never manifested.
i’ve learned another word and im gon’ share it with The Foxhole…

ACCEPT.

acceptance is more powerful than hope.
when we accept things for what they are,
it’s shifts from fantasy to reality.
tbh,
it makes situations easier to heal and/or move forward from.

“I like this dude but he isn’t showing any signs he is interested in me. So I’m going to move forward and if he comes around, great, but if he doesn’t, the actual manz that I’m looking for is around the corner. He is not the only good looking male in the forests.”

—-

“This is who America chose as president and it’s not going anywhere. Complaining and whining won’t change it so I need to move forward and protect myself as best as I can. I can have opinions about it but I won’t let it emotionally destroy me.”

—-

“This dude is DL and we fuck around. At any given moment, this will end. We only use each other for sexual satisfaction. No amount of “I love this ass” or “this is good dick” means he wants ME. I enjoy having fun with this man but that is as far as this is going to go.”

—-

“I have countless bad days/bad situations because I suffer from mental illness.”

—-

“I’m not living my best life right now because I’m not making the kind of money to allow me to do so.”

i’ve also come to learn:

It is okay to look at something and radically accept it may not work out the way we want.

i feel like by fully accepting myself,
my flaws,
things that are not working,
and not living like shit is invisible,
it has made things much easier to deal with than running from them.
there is peace and magic after acceptance that we don’t font about enough.

Letting go is truly one of the most powerful things we can ever do.

lowkey: we need to start re-framing things in our heads than fighting against them.