FOXMAIL
Hey J,
Is FoxMail still a thing???
Well, hopefully, it is… But first off, let me say Happy New Year. May this year hold everything you want and grant all that you need.
Secondly, thank you for you. I’ve legit grown up with the foxhole.
Ok, the T: I had a threesome with one of my friends and his boyfriend a few weeks ago.
I’m 32 but it was also my first time ever doing anything beyond kissing. Period. They knew this and I felt I was ready. And. It. Was. Fucking. Amazing. I was ready to not be a virgin and quite honestly, the pandemic had been a doing a number on me. I hadn’t so much as danced with anyone since February and thought at least this way I could be with someone I knew and trusted. However, I am not interested in being a throuple or in a regular ménage a trios situation. It was one (well, two) and done for me and now my friend (also 32) and his BF (a young ass 45) are trying to make this a thing and will not let it go. I’m honestly not interested and just wanna be a freak with MY boyfriend whenever I get one.
I just want my friend back sans any sex.
Did I mess up royally by blurring these lines?
MY ANSWER…
heyyyyyyyy foxholer!
thank you for the kind words!
i hope you have an amazing year ahead and yes,
foxmail is def still a thing!
you’ll be the first to kick off the resurge in foxmail for 2021!
so there is one thing that can blur the lines in friendships.
sex.
folks always claim they can fuck their friends and things will be okay,
but survey always says that is a lie.
someone always catches feelings and things end up getting weird.
This is why fwb situations rarely ever work.
it is the quickest way to destroy a friendship.
when you have a threesome with a friend and their partner,
that is another way for a friendship to go careening to hell.
in most cases,
the friend’s partner usually wants you after the sexual experience.
this is why threesomes are better with complete strangers or a distanced associate.
someone you will never (or hardly) see again.
reader,
whatever you did in that bed made them see you in a whole new light.
it was your first time and i’m sure they thought they might have turned you out.
“they thought.”
they didn’t realize you knew exactly what you were doing and could move on.
unfortunately…
This friendship is a wash.
unless they break up or your friend suddenly turns asexual,
they will always remember and associate you with that experience you three shared.
some gay males are zombies when it comes to sex.
it’s all some of us can think about and associate others with.
the good news?
You were amazing in bed for the first time.
the bad news?
They won’t see you for anything other than that going forward.
in friendships,
it’s best to keep anything sexual (especially involving a boyfriend) out if you plan on being friendly.
i say let them know you aren’t interested and to respect your decision.
just my thoughts and i hope it helped!
*if you need advice,
shoot me an email and i’ll answer on the foxhole!
I disagree, we’ve all fucked friend and got it out the way and became like brothers we people before all my attractive friends I’ve rolled with at least once before being just cool. Don’t judge me lol but the issue in this instance is they want more. After I roll around once or twice then I be on the “that’s like a brother to me” tip lol call it an initiation process. Boys will be boys at the end of the day they can be friends if he makes it clear he’s good on that. The gag is what did they do to make u not want more.
It’s honestly a case by case basis. Once I fuck a guy there’s no way I can look at him the same way that I look at my friends who I didn’t sleep with. But then again I believe in boundaries where I want my friend to stay my “friend”, I.e they don’t know me in the bedroom, only outside of that. Sex can completely change the dynamic of a friendship.
Plus not everybody sees sex the same. If I fuck somebody then I will always remember that person for sleeping with them, it’s hard for me to compartmentalise when sex is involved. But that’s just me I guess.
Wait who’s that threesome pic you used at the end I wannna see something lol
I just found the video it’s from : https://youtu.be/1fDpLRzhKfk
The story has a lot of informative information about how not to allow your friends to fool one into something that will create a problem. ONCE again your friendship has been destroyed!! Best of luck in the future!!
totally agree. it’s a wrap for that friendship. even if they breakup they will want you again individually. once you crossed the line ppl never can separate the sex from the friendship but definitely be direct and make your feelings known that you respect them so they need to respect your decision
I agree that it’s best to just be honest with your friend, come what may. Generally, I think it’s better in the long run not to blur the lines. The average person doesn’t have the emotional intelligence to handle the complicated feelings that can arise from fwb, open relationships or polyamorous relationships. Also, true friends aren’t easy to come by, so you don’t want to spoil a good friendship due to lust.