Armageddon (Sitting Within The Flames)

tumblr_m5h75eqVET1rubv39o1_500after that last entry earlier,
i’ve pretty much been on my couch.
i fell asleep,
but i woke up feeling drained.
sad.
depressed.
angry.
armageddon.
trying to put pieces together to figure out why these things happen to me.
is it me?
maybe it is.
i don’t know anymore.
i can accept if it is,
but i am coming up empty with this situation.
so someone came up to me in confidence at work today and said:

“they are trying to get rid of you,
but…

…they can’t because you are good worker.
people like you here.
you are still nice after all the drama.
that bitch you work for is trying to use something against you.
just a heads up.”

i already knew.
my spirit told me.
i’ve also noticed little things.
emails.
the side comments.
talks in the office.
kept a smile on my head.
held my head up.
“jamari.
don’t react.”
i come in on time,
leave on time,
do my job,
double check my work,
be respectful to everyone and in turn get the same…

.

.

.

.

.
…but my boss and her minion?
nah.
not so much.

“look for a new job.”

i have been.
for the last couple months.
it sucks,
ya know?
god forbid i was everything of the complete opposite.
i’m sure i would be the fuckin’ president.
smh.

Author: jamari fox

the fox invited to the blogging table.

10 thoughts on “Armageddon (Sitting Within The Flames)

  1. Have faith Jamari! God has the blessings in store and some of them are on a timer. You lift other peoples spirits (definitely mine) and that alone is enough for you to be showered with goodness.

  2. Ain’t nobody got time for that. Especially at a 9 to 5 where people are just looking to work and then go home. You’ve got bills and a hungry stomach to worry about, now two menstruating witches as well. All that scheming & plotting is uncalled for. They don’t know what’s going on in your personal life. You could have two or three foster kids you’re supporting with that check. I’m legit mad and perplexed at the same time because I don’t understand why. What’s the point? They’re making your work environment be way more complicated than it needs to. Remember tho, it won’t last forever… because yo ass will be busy writing best sellers and deciding which shirt makes a wolf’s skin-tone pop. 😉

    You thought I was going the suicidal route didn’t you. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

  3. It upsets me that they are trying to get a rid of you. I personally wouldn’t have wanted someone to tell me that, it would make me uneasy everyday that I’m there, but you have to make that money I guess. It puts you between a rock and hard place.

  4. No life bitches ugh I’m sorry to hear that, I’m glad someone gave you the heads up even tho you already had a feeling. Try not to worry (I know it’s easier said than done) I have a feeling that fashion week experience will work out in your favor.

  5. I come to your blog everyday and I love it. Having said that, you sound like a victim. Don’t let them or anyone to victimize you. You know you got your ish together. Walk in that light and walk in peace and walk in love. You are a vic-tor not a vic-tim!! No one can take your joy away unless you allow them too. I know it took awhile for you to find that job but maybe you should be looking for a career. Ask yourself, if I show up in excellence everyday and these hoes still don’t appreciate what I do, then you are definitely in the wrong place. Even if you have to leave or are forced to leave, you do not know that it will take you as long as it did the last time. Believe that your blessing is right around the corner. I’m a Real Estate executive and I don’t co-sign no bullshit and coming to your site every morning is like people getting their news and morning coffee: a must. Focus on what you have and what you want and not just your current situation. I know I’m sounding preachy but you have to believe that you latter days will be greater than your former days and you have to walk in that light. The best is yet to come. Coming soon. Blessings on the way. One last thing, here’s a tough honest truth: How much of your current situation is your fault because you walk around in offense. In other words, have you been hurt and let down so much by people that you subconsciously sit back waiting to be hurt and betrayed carrying an energy of offense that you keep recreating that situation over and over again that all leads back to this one point: I AM NOT ENOUGH. Ask yourself Jamari, what is my responsibility in my current situation?

  6. Maybe you should speak to Mr. Green and look for advancement or training opportunities…say you want to learning new things and seem like you wanna grow with the company to get out of ur position.

  7. Continue to work hard, and do everything by the books, write down notes from conversations that you have in regards to you being terminated…if they’re trying to build something against you that’s not true you can contact your attorney general if it gets to that point, but for now hold fast and just keep working hard. I’d speak to Mr. Green personally to see where his head is, maybe to even give your perspective on how you’ve been treated at the office and continue to look for employment in the meantime…

  8. I hate the fact that some people don’t know how to get out of that high school phase. I don’t see what is the point of them acting the way they do. Just do your damn work and leave people alone.

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