59 thoughts on “That Wolf Is Really The Sexy Girlfriend”

1. Wasn’t gonna say anything but man this post and a few of the comments really reminded me how I’m still just not all that comfortable with the roles. It’s to the point that being gay should probably come with an instruction manual how wrapped up in roles and boundaries and set characterizations of roles some of you guys are. Just read Yngblk say well one wolf can occasional bottom for the other in a 2 wolf relationship only for TheMan to quick ass interject: “then he is NOT a Wolf! Wolves don’t bottom EVER!” lol. I knew that was gonna be the response and its no offense to TheMan but even though I knew what was coming it still kinda made me cringe some.

   All these roles…it just used to be top/bottom.Then came verse which is prolly where I’m at I guess. But now there’s even subsets of that, like I’m seeing dudes claim verse-top, verse-bottom then you got power-top, power-bottoms and on and on…I mean do we really need all of this? That’s just the naming of em as well, don’t forget they all come with set ways in how you can act in and out of the bedroom lol. I dunno it’s a bit much. My position on the ‘roles’ is not to say I’m about to disassociate myself with Jamari’s main gripe though. Him not being attracted to ‘feminine’ in men. He’s not Lucifer’s first born because of his preference to masculine dudes either. I’m masculine and attracted to masculine as well. My only diff with him I believe is not attributing masculinity and varying levels of it to “roles.” For me that’s where some the issues and some of the blowback stemmed from in here too.

2. damn, dint know i’d see all these comments. .. thats petty for putting Arquez..Bahahahaha

3. I’ll say this and then I’ll shut up.

   I’m naturally masculine. Always have been. Sports? I did that. Rough housing? I did that. Fixing cars? I did that. Anything considering stereotypically masculine, I grew up doing.

   I can be a wolf. That comes naturally to me. Being dominating. Protective. That’s easy for me. I have the body, I have the personality, I have the voice. The only way you would have any indication that I’m gay or half fox is if I told you.

   I don’t put that on. That’s who I am.

   All that said, when a man first speaks to me, his first thought shouldn’t be getting into my pants and I think that’s the underlying point. A fox wouldn’t have to warn you he was a fox if fucking him wasn’t the first thing that came to your mind, you feel me? Sometimes, I honestly feel like gay men get too caught up in role playing. Why can’t a fox date another fox? We’ve all seen two wolves be in a relationship and make it work. Why can’t foxes do the same? It’s almost as if foxes are so wrapped up in this ideologically belief as to what their man should be that they disqualify any and all that could very well be good matches for them.

   That said, there is a difference between being a fox and being feminine and what annoys me about feminine foxes is the constant quest they have to be seen as desireable by forever. God forbid you say you aren’t attracted to feminine men. Suddenly you’re a self hating homosexuality denying your gay history. It’s ridiculous.

   Preference does exist and it is okay to have one.

   1. I agree with most of everything you said, but if a Fox dates another Fox how would that work when they both like dick? Will it just be a sexless relationship? Their is no such thing as a Fox on Fox and Wolf on Wolf. That’s like me and Wolfie getting together, that shit ain gonna work unless somebody wants to change into a Hybrid at the least. LOL

      1. Well that’s just it. Not every man likes anal sex or even sex at all. Some dude are turned off by sex. Some dudes are very open minded in their relationships. I knew two bottoms who bought toys….double dildo action.Freaky shit.

         We are so caught up in the whole role playing bullshit, we forgot how diverse our community really is!

         We should kill the role play shit and just be natural.

      2. Yea but that’s not gonna work for everybody; just a few. I’m sure if two Foxes are in a 5 year long relationship, atleast one of them has snuck out and got some dick st some point. I don’t know much about sex toys, but what would two Wolves use as a substitute for sex?

      3. There are more wolf-wolf relationships than you think. Fox-fox would be hard because someone would want some d1ck, but they could make it work if they wanted.

         But I know Wolf relationships – some occasionally bottom for each other & bring in a fox when they really wanna smash (a la immanuel), some do everything but anal sex.

      4. Wolfie, if they occasionally bottom for eachother they are NOT wolves homie. They are Hybrids. A Wolf is a man who doesn’t take dick up the ass at all, or a man who tried it but didn’t like it. The only thing they could do is give eachother head and invite another fox in the bedroom.

      5. I disagree about your wolf assesment

      6. Maybe you could show me how Wolves bottom for each oher. I don’t know so I might need you to bend over and show me. 😉

   2. Random, the idea of dating another Fox is repulsive to foxes, and not even just the feminine ones period!

      I’ve seen enough to know that is the general attitude. They want to be FUCKED and DOMINATED. There’s nothing another Beta can do for them but be another girlfriend.

      Sex and image are the only thing that matters in this world. No one can tell me different.Personality, character, morals, etc are mere accessories that you think about after the fact to complement.

      1. He better not tell Jamari to date another Fox, he’ll have a fit. LOL

4. For Jamari,

   So i goes to the barbershop to get a line up or whatever because I am leaving to go back to school and wanna, you know, look fresh as possible. So i get in the chair, im my barber’s first and only customer so far in the day, thinking it will be a fast and simple process and i will be on my merry fucking way. Nope. This dude took like 30-45 minutes to give me a shape-up. I’ll grant you, i had a good amount of hair to take of my face because i was going from slight beard to goatee…but damn that amount of time it took me to get out of the door was ridiculous. He was asking about what i have been doing over the summer, and what school for me was like, and we was cracking up or whatever. This is something I am used to, this dude been cutting my hair since I was like 6 or 7, and i cant complain too much because he only charges me five dollars for a shape up and he does a damn good job (mind you its because he has a thang for my mom and she is very shapely and beautiful). Now its time to get to the gag, after he was done he was like “Yo, let me talk to you outside for a minute because I wanted to ask you a question.” I’m just thinking like “Damn, nigga, didn’t you just hold me up for like an eternity for a shape up?” but i said okay and we went outside. So we outside, and I was thinking he was just going to ask me about my moms boyfriend or some shit like that. Nope. He says, and i vaguely quote “I just been wanting to ask you this question for a long time, do you like men or women? Because, you never mention girls and when i was your age i was doing blah blah blah and went to the clinique and would have had whatever, and so forth and so on.” The fuck? I was so shocked, but i wasn’t mad or offended…all i could do was laugh it off and i replied “Does it matter?” And he was like “Naw, i mean you do what you gotta do” or some shit like that. And I am just like what? So i was just like see ya (even-though i wont be back until break) and went on about my business. I am still confused though. I really hope ain’t trying to get on or nothing, but he was throwing me a lot of compliments and kept me in that bitch forever (im just getting this vibe)…but that shit was random, awkward, and funny all at the same damn time.

   1. Well you know the barbers the pillar of our community so they are fathers to us. Maybe he just wanted to know for sure instead of assuming. Either that, or he wanted you to trim his edges if you get my drift. I wish my barber would come on to me…he is like 60 though…ugh..

      1. Lmfao, yeah it was weird. He’s like a goofy older cousin to me so I really hope its not what i think it is, but you never now with niggas…. Barbershops just can come of as so unnecessarily hyper-masculine and he has said some derogatory things about homosexuals in the past, not often or even consistently, but the still left an impression with me regardless…so I was just hesitant. Its like “is this the type of space I want to have my sexuality open, what kind of consequences will that ensue?” And i did feel bad for leaving his question somewhat unanswered..but i think he gets the picture. And if he don’t its really not my issue anyway. It feels good to be in this space to be really comfortable in my sexuality, not feeling the need to hid who I am but neither having the need to through it in any ones face. Overall, the situation just made me secure in who I am.

5. ^if george hill tried to talk to me,
   he was slightly feminine,
   and wanted my number: I WOULD BE TALKING TO HIM IN A HEARTBEAT.

   if george hill tried to talk to me,
   he was slightly feminine,
   messy as hell,
   everyone in the club scene knows him,
   and he was raging queen: WE AREN’T SPEAKING.

   i’m not even feeling him now because of how out there he is in the straight world.
   i like a low key wolf.
   i have always liked that.

   i guess i apologize for liking well built attractive men….?

   1. No you should not apologize for what you are naturally attracted to. I sure as hell don’t. I just wish we would be more open to other alternatives out there. I get the feeling that if you are masculine, you are cool no matter what but if you are slight feminine, it’s a problem. I ain’t with the gay scene either for similar reasons but I don’t mind a dude with a little sugar in his tank (and some integrity). I don’t care if he is feminine really, just carry yourself with respect.

      In your what you are speaking about is jackal/hyena behavior aka fag behavior and they come in many different forms including the trifilin’ two timing dudes who sleeping with their baby mamas and spending your dough. They treat you like shit in public but want to fuck you in the wee hours. Those type of dudes are just as messy too. There are messy ass people out there and society is to blame for that.

      We have to call them ALL out. Men can be just as catty and shady as women, it’s been that way since the beginning of time. Don’t believe me, Ask Judas shady ass!

      1. ^but you know what,
         i feel like the propaganda is “you don’t love yourself if you aren’t feminine”.
         ok so, what if you aren’t feminine?
         what if you are a regular dude who happens to be gay and just not attracted to feminine men?
         why is that something that people throw “self hate” out at?
         that is very insulting.

         there is no self hate in this realm of jamari fox, btw.
         i love myself and i love who i am attracted too.
         men.
         if i feel something, i’m interested.
         you will be surprised who i find attractive.
         i think people misconstrued me.
         because i put up a picture of a baller,
         i hate myself.
         no i like sex and he sexually stimulates me.
         i always liked athletes and men who resemble that in shape.

         and i’m not interested in fucking,
         i choose to be fucked.
         so i’m confused at the problem with alla that?

      2. Jamari you know I love you..

         But I don’t want you to take this as an attack. I am just expressing my opinion based on observation of what I see and it seems that I am not alone so there must be some truth in the matter.

         I never said you hated yourself nor should you apologize for what you are attracted. If it comes off that way, it’s not my intentions.

         I like the ballers and gym bunnies too. I just love men period.

         I am just saying that it’s all black and white.

         I think KingPhoenix is kinda harish but I can understand why he is saying what he is saying.

         Don’t get on the defense babe. We just talking man. At the end of the day, you are going to do you but just take what you can boo..

         1. ^i did feel attacked.
            i felt a ton of shade thrown my way and i’m really not feeling it.
            that low key pissed me off.

      3. That was not my intention but you gotta take the critics like you take your praise, in strives. We always going to have our differences but you know we ALL support you, otherwise we wouldn’t waste our interest.

         Sometimes the truth can sting..

         How about I take you to your favorite restaurant, lets go see Sparkle and then I take you home and eat your cakes out???? Will that make you feel better?

         1. oh luckey baby you can def take me to see sparkle,
            on your dime of course.
            you will get the best cakes of your life
            you make get some wet sloppy throat too…

            after you get me this:

            

            nothing says “i’m sorry” like 6 stacks of “never let that happen again”.

            1. btw that’s tiffanys.
               i’d ike that on the bed with rose petals on the bed when you bring me home with movie and dinner.

            2. i’m tryna figure out if i’ll have king get me the matching ring or an all expenses paid trip to las vegas.
               where i stay at the mgm grand and spending money for the casino….

               😉

               i love “i’m sorry” time!

      4. ^ Jamari, i’m not sorry for what i said so much as to how it came off to you. There was no i’ll intent meant. Only love and positivity, just giving another frame of mind. Plus, I am a college student. I have no money to be tricking on niggas i never even seent before. Ain’t no body got time for that. lol

      5. Now Jamari……..I ain’t about that life. You better have some bomb ass cakes AND you better know how to cook AND your income better match that AND you gag and gargle on my shit….You better be able to match that shit!

         1. for that answer,
            i think of this song:

            http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xvahpROFPhA

            lowkey: i miss this lil kim.

   2. No you don’t have to apologize for that at all because everyone has a preference. Just like I’m not going to stop liking masc men. It is what it is. I won’t change it because I don’t like anything that isn’t masc. He doesn’t have to be buff or 6’5 or anything, but masculine is a “must” and that aint too much to ask for. Some people may be open to dating different types but I just can’t. You like what you like. Any gay dude that thinks different needs to think about their response if someone asked them why aren’t they open to dating women?

   3. If all this wolf talk aint evidence of Feminine behavior I don’t know what is LOL!…You do just what you hate sometimes. Example just like when you clown George Hill on your blog simply because of how he carried himself or acted on his twitter wall. That to me was kinda messy putting him out there for your blogging audience on Blog site catered to the inner homosexual. Actually you went on quite a few while assuming a bitchy like persona towards men, who didn’t feel it was okay to have their picture on sites such as yours. You made topics of discussion on these particular men and were very critical of their position. That can be seen as messy and feminine like from a straight guys perspective.

      1. ^
         😉

6. I am going to say this and y’all can take it as you want to.

   Part of it is how society has program us to think that anything that is remotely ‘gay’ is repulsive. So we try to butch it up for the world in hopes that somebody will like us but we aren’t being true selves. What is kinda sad is that the straight boys are starting to channel their femimine side, while we are trying SO hard to be butch and hard. It’s the way the world is right now.

   Another part of the problem is us. We are becoming our oppressors. We can be very nasty towards each other esp if they are fat/fems. These days it’s all about going to the gym, getting tattooed up and throw on some baggy pants, fitted hat and timbz and instantly you are a ‘wolf’. There are a lot of dudes who act like that right now because we demand that from them. They know they can’t compete being their true selves because we will not fuck with them.

   I love your site Jamari and you know this but you do have this old school mentality. A wolf should look like a wolf and a fox should look like a fox. You post pics of the ideal masculine ‘str8 looking’ dude. (Nothing wrong with that but that’s your pattern and I understand you are trying to satify your readers) As soon as we see a smudge of fem in him, we are ready to write him off.

   Now I get what you are saying about the messy hyenas/jackals. I agree with you 100% but what about the good dude with a little sugar in his tank, he can’t get no love? Why do we act like queens just started to exist? Hell they paved the way for us to be ourselves as same gender loving men. Sure there are some who rather be in high heels then timbz but that’s their reality and that’s okay.

   I look at some of these pics and the guys you think are wolves are the biggest foxes in the forest. They have the Adonis body and they are giving you the ‘look’ but they rather bend over before you do.

   In my opinion, it’s reality. At the end of the day, we gotta start being ourselves and not apologize for it. If you are naturally masculine, be that shit. If you are a prissy queen, be that shit! (Don’t be a jackal/hyena though..they can chew on concrete!)

   Stop trying to fit in just to prove something to somebody else. There is a time and place for everything but stop faking it. Ain’t nothing wrong with having a preference but sometimes you gotta be honest in how that preference was developed.

   Even in 2012, we secretly want to be with a straight dude or anything that is close to that and I will never understand that. Is it because we were taught to hate ourselves?

   As for me, I don’t want a dude, who is damn near a woman but give me a dude with a little sugar in his tank. I don’t want the uber masculine ‘str8 appearing’ dude. If he is a good man, with a sense of humor, in touch with his feelings and secure with his shit, that is the man for me.

   Just my opinion on the matter, you know how passionate I am about this subject!

   1. Damn I loved this comment.

      1. I just hope it reaches somebody. I understand some of us have to play the role for the sake of our circumstances but we are losing ourselves as a whole. It’s deeper then the whole masculine/feminine situation man..

   2. I get what you’re saying, but the problem is VERY few dudes are as evolved as you are. Even out and proud dudes put hyper-masculinity on a pedestal while declaring they detest anything remotely like them (fem or beta behavior).

      I think I’ve long accepted you have to portray yourself a certain way to attract guys so when I want one I do that and when I don’t I’m just shooting the breeze.

      1. I feel you but personally I let go LONG time ago and it’s been working for me every since. I can’t keep the boys off me…LOL I am just my natural self, the way I was created. You either love me or hate me.

      2. I agree with this.

   3. ^here is my take on this whole issue….
      some gay men can be messy.
      some gay feminine are VERY messy.
      the ones i have come across are disgusting.
      the whole lifestyle is messy.
      i’m not into that life.
      just like hood boys and their drama,
      i’m not with it.

      we are oppressors because we become females and act catty towards each other.
      we act like girls.
      it has nothing to do with who we fuck or choose to fuck.
      i think most men in general have become rather feminine being raised by single mothers.
      but in the gay world,
      that is magnified ten fold.

      another thing,
      whats wrong with preference?
      ideally, we all want someone we are attracted too, right?
      i’m attracted to whoever makes me hard.
      i have still found some wolves who are slightly feminine attractive.
      i’m not going to turn down dating one.
      i put up a wolf on here that i thought was fine and everyone went in on how he looked feminine.
      i said i was attracted to chad and everyone said he was ugly.
      so i am open to things,
      just not in the way you may operate in your life.

      what i don’t like is messy queens.
      i’m down to date anything over that.
      …. oh and money.
      you cannot be broke.

      1. I understand that, but you have to realize that you have demonized femininity in your mind. You equate female to bitchy, messy, queen and all that. You are extremely hetero-patriarchal. in your thinking Jamari. You know you have experience straight men with all those characteristics that you describe. I know i have, they can be just as bitchy and conniving as woman but still love pussy and have not interest in being with other men. Those negative personality traits should not be automatically assumed to be feminine. People are just ass wholes period. You value masculinity over everything else Jamari, men are so much than that…people period are so much more than genders and stereotypes. Maybe that should be something you look into…possibly doing some research and reading on gender and homosexuality or even going to into therapy dealing with these issues. I’m not trying to pry, but it seems as though your opinions on gender and sexuality come from a source or experience that may not be the healthiest for you.

   4. #OOP Luckey, you better educate the kids on self-hate.lol. But seriously, I think it will be hard for you to find that super masculine wolf your looking for. Its something I know I couldn’t deal with. I don’t care how fine he is, like Luckey says I need a man with a little “sugar in his tank.” I want somebody to love, sex, and ki with. I love my feminine aspects just as much as the masculine ones, and though the masculine out weighs the feminine I cannot value you one trait more than the other. And its more than being a “hybrid” or a “werewolf” thing-which I see as being something only sexual. I think its human. We have to remember gender is LEARNED. Its not innate, its not instinctual. The basis of my relationship with some one could never be whether they are “wolf” or “fox” enough. Gender and sexuality is so much complicated than that.

      1. ^you find someone,
         you are attracted to them,
         you guys have fun and talk,
         the sex is great…

         … that sounds like a boyfriend and again, your “preference”.
         you can find that in super masculine and super feminine.

      2. Exactly my point. We have to discover who we really are naturally and live our truth. Give me a man with some sugar so we can make SWEET kool aid! Gay men are special beings. Just like transgender people are two spirited, we are put on this earth for a reason.

      3. @Jamari, its so much more than that you have a stigma against gay men…im not even sure if you like being gay ( theres a major difference between being gay and being homosexual). You seem to just like men who are masculine because thats what society values and upholds, its like your look for the best prize instead of the best person.

         1. ^ok well i’ll let you think that.
            you have your view of me and that is your decision.
            i really dont care at this point to change it.

            but i think you are a great commenter.

      4. @Luckey

         You better show me you’ve read something other than an erotic novel or a gossip site and that you know your worth! lol

      5. Aw Jamari don’t get defensive on me, its not an attack or anything like that. I’m not judging YOU because I don’t know you. Its more of what you are putting out there (well on this site). Its the energy you give off. It comes of as if you only like a certain man, with a certain profession and all that. I mean your so harsh on a woman like Evelyn being a gold-digger but your attracted to the same kind of man she is. Your bout that life. I would just hate to see you stunt your horizons because of society…fuck the mainstream. And thanks for the love. I am going to revel some crazy shit that happen to me earlier on today in a seperate comment, and maybe it will cheer you up. 🙂

   5. Best Comment on this site hands down. This is exactly how I feel.

   6. Damn Lucky I will be looking forward to more comments from you my friend, yes indeed.

   7. look at that, dint know you were that smart. Gay dudes want to be masculine and straight men want to say “girl”, and wear shorts and pink polos

7. Yea I believe there are many “sexy girlfriends” out there, but it’s that way for a reason, hear me out. Think about it for a second you guys. There are more foxes out there because this lifestyle is about getting dick and nothing else. Men can’t get dicked down by other women of course so they seek out other men. It’s all about getting something you can’t get from a woman. When it comes to us Wolves it’s about getting another man’s ass. Sure we could find a female who is willing to be down, but we want a man’s ass. Liking other men alone gives me a rush, but fucking one in the ass and knowing that’s the only way I can fuck them sends me through the roof. I’m sure it’s some Wolves out there who can easily relate.

   1. Oh and when it comes to d/l laid back dudes, they are usually down too, I think I said that before. Some are that way because they feel they won’t be talked about, but they are clockable. I’m that way around people I don’t know. People who are close to me know different.

8. A lot of sexy girlfriends will be at the latex ball tomorrow

   1. ^why is it “latex”?
      is it a sex party too?

9. Oh how well do I know this, when the flowers fall out.

   1. ^and then afterward,
      you don’t see a “body” anymore.
      everything starts to make sense lol

10. Imma let y’all foxes commiserate, cuz this isn’t really a problem for me…lol

    1. Amen! Either way I’m winning. Lol

    2. ^even if he is your type and has a crown on his head?

       1. Lol I’m growing a little bit. There’s this dude on twitter I have a crush on and he wears eyeliner occasionally and I still find myself attracted to him. I should send you his twitter. Lol

       2. I guess I’ve grown too, cuz I’ve messed w/dudes that could be seen as a little fem…now iCant with Rupaul & nem, but any dude who messes w/guys is gonna have his moments – especially if he’s out…even if it’s just to those in the know *shrug*

          And Jay – I wanna follow YOU on twitter…lol

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