“things could be worse”.
like a marquee going through my head.
i woke up out my sleep at 630am.
looking in my bank account just now,
i started playing scenarios in my head of “worse”.
sitting at a corner holding up a sign.
trying to keep warm with twenty cats and a cardboard box.
i even saw myself drinking a urine cocktail.
“ew”.
i know.
“jumping ahead, much?”…

Continue reading “I’m Thankful I Didn’t Have To Bathe In My Own Pee This Morning!” →

…not ones who are still wearing coogi.
it has been a tough week for ex baller wolf of the patriots,
now current murderer,
aaron hernandez.
he was just taken into custody for ending his friend’s life:

and you won’t believe why…

Continue reading “We Like Dem Baller Wolf Thugz Who Carry Gatz In Their Jock Strapz” →

“what would you say if i was dating ____________?”

she showed me the picture on her phone.

“____________ looks like your type.”

hell looked like my type.
i didn’t want to say that out loud tho.
she didn’t know how i got down.
______ was tall,
dark,
and handsome.
i thought it was a baller wolf.
_________ wasn’t shirtless,
but you could tell there was a nice body underneath the suit.
she told me that they worked together.
job title: supervisor.
every vixen and fox working there was interested.
________ was interested in her tho.
so what was the issue?

“that was once a woman baby!”

oh yes.
i was picture cat fished…
Continue reading “Old Pussies Equals New Dicks” →

that ragga who posted that picture of the gun on his sis…
that really bothered me yesterday.
he got what we wanted tho.
j cole retweeted him plus he got a few followers in his attention whoring.
being extremely hood is “it”.
miley cyrus and these snow bunnies are takin’ twerkin to a new level.
rihanna and breezy wolf make “ratchet” look kinda cool.
they even got beyonce changing her tune.
you will be surprised how ghetto these stars are behind the scenes.
don’t let the media training fool you.
hood rats and their imposters are everywhere!
anyone with free wifi can access the internet on their computers and phones.
don’t even get me started on camera phones.
i started to wonder if being common is in?
are you taken more seriously when you are ghetto?
the white people are doing it so it’s cool now, right?
i’m sure all the ghetto females at my old job are still employed.
i had to ask…

Is life better as a hood rat?

Continue reading “Come Here and Fuck My Juicy Hood Bussy Right Now” →

i saw the following on tumblr and i had to post this.

Continue reading “They Hate Me! They Really Really Hate Me!” →

going back to your past can bring closure or new beginnings.
all of us have doors we haven’t closed yet,
or ones that are half way open.
in some instances,
it’s best to pack up and move out the entire house completely.
it was a surprise to me when i saw someone from my past illuminate my phone.
i was completely in shock.
what was i in for?…

Continue reading “How The Past Can Come Back and Make You Say, “Oh Good Lord”.” →