Spinoff: How To Handle The Bone Collector

I don’t know about my Foxes out there…
And this may sound kind of sick…
but “The Bone Collectors” I talked about in the last entry… I have a fantasy about them….

Want to hear?

They fit the ideal of what we talk about in The Foxhole.
Fine, muscular, tatts, sex candy, and just the ideal of the masculine stereotype in living motion.

I am more-so turned on by bringing their egos down a few notches and have them chase me.
Is that bad?
Make them feel like the thirst bucket and have them wondering where I am, blowing up my phone…

… ya know, slap em around a bit emotionally.

To turn the alpha male into putty in my hands.
Making him so wrapped up in the thought of me that he could barely focus on anyone else.
The issue the thirst buckets have is they already give their power up the moment they send the first message.
It is usually something banal and expected.

“Sup”
“Hey”
and “Whats good” are all UN-original statements to these Wolves.
Even though they claim “do not send me a message with just hey or sup” in their profiles,
what in fuck’s sake are you suppose to send????????

So then the thirst buckets resort to:

“I want to suck you dick.”
“Damn I want to fuck you”
or “You so sexy that I just want to make your toes curl” ….
they are all desperate attempts to make him see you as “the best sex they may ever receive”.

Don’t even get me started on the ones who send the same messages repeatedly, only to end up BLOCKED.

Have you ever noticed that when you treat a Wolf you are not attracted to like shit, he keeps on cumming and cumming?
When you treat one you are attracted to like a KING, he keeps on running and running?

It is all about shifting your energy on the Bone Collector the same way.
They secretly want to be told what to do, bossed around, bitched at, and not taken seriously.
BASICALLY: A REAL HARD MIND FUCK.
That is a turn on to them, plus they need to feel loved and wanted.
Their self esteem tends to be sketchy anyway so once you infiltrate in their mind, you are pretty much in.
This only works once you have gotten their attention and they are pursuing you.
You cannot play these games with a Bone Collector with no connection whatsoever.
You can be nice as hell,
but when he acts up,
let him know (through actions) YOU are not the Jackal or Hyena he is use too.
Do everything the thirst buckets DO NOT DO.
Which means observe your prey before you strike.

I still have Wolves I am not attracted to chasing me because of that.
One just sent me a text about how he is still mad at me.
Um, we haven’t spoken in a year and you are still mad?????
Wow.
I don’t even know what he was mad about.
But, watch if I was to chase him, he would run from me.
AND HE AIN’T EVEN A BONE COLLECTOR!!!!!

It ain’t about sex or good looks, it is all how you carry yourself and what you tolerate that will keep you in the game longer than the rest.


Where is your mind at?

Author: jamari fox

the fox invited to the blogging table.

16 thoughts on “Spinoff: How To Handle The Bone Collector

  1. Interesting posts as of late.. Can I offer a few insights, observations and opinions, so to speak.
    I notice and always have noticed how critical, judgmental and overly opinionated people are these days about some of the most mundane things. Now I know sometimes things are done in jest, but when looked upon a little deeper, there really is an underlying issue somewhere.
    One of my female friends asked me why gay men are sooo super critical, when many of them walk around like characters out of cartoons and Fright Night. Not just the flamboyant ones, but the hyper masculine also. The main reason that I gave her is that an overly critical individual is trying to mask their own issues by constantly attacking others. It is a smoke and mirrors shenanigan that is a poor magic trick, so that others do not see that the individual is broken. I also said that this may be the very reason why a lot of gay individuals, particularly men, try so hard to be perfect(whether body, financially, appearance, etc). I do not know about the lesbians, they just exist…lol. Haven’t quite figured some of them out.

    All this comes from my personal experience and vast years of observing. I am not apart of any of the (hook up sites), but I have many associates and friends that swear by them. There is constant perusing and judging. 9 times out of ten, you know exactly what you are going to get from sites like those. From bogus pictures to beautiful pictures. From made up aliases.. to desperate individuals. From trying to be on the ‘low’ and wanting no one in your business to telling everyone that they know, who they met online. It seems to be all a game that people feel they need to play, only to be left miserable, lonely, disappointed, etc. Asking questions like, ‘Why can’t I find a good _______(fill in the blank)?’

    People are really scared of being themselves because they do not like themselves, let alone LOVE themselves. This is my biggest TURNOFF. People a lot of times are out of their league when they try to approach someone as a potential life partner when they do not even know what they themselves bring to the table besides, body, ass, dick, title, tats, swag, money, etc. All things that may vanish overtime. These individuals haven’t really taken the time to like being with themselves ,let alone love being with themselves. How can you expect someone to like being around you when you don’t like being around yourself?
    So it seems that people go after their fantasy, ideal person, a 3.0 model when they themselves are still basic 1.0. Only upgrading the superficial things that they think will last, but never does. Keep feeding someone’s superficiality (sexually, financially, mentally, spiritually, etc) and you will continue to become whatever you think that person likes for the moment instead of WHO you were really created to be.

    Nowadays we have a lot of folks with e-courage, that can get on computers, hide behind an alias and talk shit nonstop, be passive aggressive as hell, but in reality would never open their mouths in public against an issue. This just makes people socially retarded now and weak in interactions with actual humans in an actual real environment. This isn’t a slam against anyone in particular, just food for thought. I just feel people are preoccupied with trying to FIND the one, when they do not even know HOW to authentically be a ONE. Friend conversations + my own recent experiences+ everyone criticizing those that have significant others+ those that have HIGH demands of what they WANT in a relationship + INSECURITY and DESPERATION= this response. Just my two cents.

  2. Man at 22 years of age im already over the.mind games. Im getting more and more blunt as I get older. Im not chasing anyone anymore. I will tell if I like you and if I enjoy your company, but anyone I get serious with is going to have to meet me half way and be able to say the same.

    1. everything unfortunately is a game jay.
      you may not want to play games,
      but everyone else is on the court.

      females play games.
      men play games.

      everyone is signed up to mindgamesfoyomind.com
      lol

      1. Well I definitely don’t want to play the game of being in some grey area. Not knowing where I stand in someone’s life or what role I play. If that’s the case I’m likely to walk away and not look back.

  3. I don’t think we’re talking about potentially setting our sites on a long term commitment with men like this, just discussing these types of men in general and how one can interact with them? Bone collectors need to feel needed. So when you’re aloof and unavailable, he may not necessarily be chasing after you because he likes YOU but more so because he’s chasing you from a place of possessiveness and need for control. He doesn’t want you but he doesn’t want you to NOT want him and only wants you to stop wanting him when he decides it. He feels out of control and is responding to potentially feeling rejected. Usually, what tends to happen with these types of men is they end up blowing hot and cold. He’ll chase you and then once you’ve sort of gotten comfortable he’ll become distant until you leave again and then he’ll start blowing hot to get you back to where you were. Of course he isn’t only talking to you though. His groupies are still present, texting his phone and responding to him on social media. He’s just entertained by your interaction and seeks to conquer you.The question becomes how long are you willing to stay playing the game of aloofness and how long will he chase you? How likely is it for these types of men to turn into long term, committed partners?

    1. you are absolutely right Vain.
      but, I knew a “most wanted” Wolf but at the time,
      I second guessed myself after I got comfortable.
      he shared with me that he would have been with me but because I started showing my insecurities, he got turrned off.
      when I was treating him like my bitch and was pretty much aloof (subconiously), he was attracted to me because I never took his shit and didn’t take him serious.

      I feel it is confidence.
      I don’t know how long it would take to lock one down because some are looking more than others.
      every wolf, I don’t care who he is, has options.
      foxes like to put their eggs in 1 basket and hope it works.
      I know because I have been there.

      maybe everyone’s experiences are different….

  4. Anthony you have spoken powerful words. Vain I did not know you had a blog too, I guess Im late, I read your past work so long yesterday that my head literally was hurting. You have such powerful insight about men. I been in some dark places these last few years dealing with men, but discovering this blog and the interaction has given me so much insight and strength to press on another day. I wish I could meet people like you all in real life instead of most of my friends who are like the men you all talk about(LOL). I am glad to find a place with intelligent insightful brothers, this blog has become therapeutic.

    1. Aw, that’s really nice of you to say! I started my blog to just keep track of everything that goes on in that realm of my life as well as other tidbits. I do a lot of observation and i ask a lot of questions. I know how you feel in that this place is a great way to get some insight on how to deal with this thing called dating. I personally believe its important to express ourselves and our experiences to help make sense of it all since we’re all kind of just winging it. Dealing with men is hard even when you have it all together and you’re no longer dating from a place of loneliness. But we’re all pretty much going through the same things. You are never alone.

  5. #whoisjamarifox :
    he shared with me that he would have been with me but because I started showing my insecurities, he got turrned off.

    Please. Don’t believe that nonsense. If he wanted the two of you to be together, you would have been. Men say things like that to try and make excuses for their behavior and make it look as though YOU are the problem. How convenient for him to come out and express interest in being serious AFTER IT ENDED. If it took you having to pretend to be someone you naturally aren’t to keep him interested, you’re potential relationship was doomed from the start anyway.

    Speaking of options: This fysh wrote a good theory about the differences between men and women that reflect the experiences of wolves “options” and foxes” eggs in one basket”.

    http://somethingshedated.blogspot.com/2011/08/bird-seed-theory-or-why-he-keeps.html

  6. I think there’s a balance to not being a pushover, but not also being an a-hole. Why do we have to go to either extreme? Both are turn-offs for me. If I’m trying to talk to you, I want to know that you’re feeling me — that this thing is reciprocated. If not, I can find someone who does show they care.

    On the other hand, if I can roll you like a cheap carpet – I’m out too. It’s a quick ego boost, but nothing lasting. At one time, you’d be a quick f*ck, but even that gets boring now. I want substance…anyone else feeling me?

  7. This is why I always act like I don’t really care around guys. When you show that you want them, they treat you like another piece of ass. Its a delicate art, getting their attention without inflating their ego. The better you are at mind games, the easier it is. If the games break their interest in you, they were ready in the first place. Its like there’s two classes: the douche bags, and the real men.

  8. How many copies of this book are youll going to print because the fellow foxes are waiting? I will be taking my copy now! lol

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