thoughts at 3am.
my favorite.
i love when i’m laying in bed and have this urge to cum to the foxhole.
it means i was really in my head about something.
i had to get this off tonight.
it couldn’t wait until morning.
i said i wouldn’t mention “work wolf” again,
but i’ll say this…
i have come to realize that i need to relax.
there needs to be a heavy “go with the flow” for 2016.
i am the type that needs to know what is happening.
i don’t like when i’m not in control.
so when i’m forced to wonder or guess,
it makes my mind go into a tail spin.
i start blaming and beating myself up at the “twists and turns”.
i had to wonder…
When did I start getting so uptight about shit?
hmm.
i remember when readers were telling me about work wolf:
“you need to ask him if he is gay.”
“you should walk up to him and stick your tongue in his mouth.”
“go grab his dick and get the party started…”
uh.
that all sounds like a recipe for disaster.
you can’t do those things to anyone who isn’t comfortable.
hell you don’t know anything so why even assume?
not of that ever ends well.
you always have to go with the flow when things are confusing.
sure,
we all want answers,
but sometimes its best to just let the knots unravel.
they need to do it.
you need to concentrate of being good company.
for instance…
i am terrified of heights.
the thought of jumping out a plane or bungee jumping makes me sick.
i am not comfortable with any of that.
so imagine bringing me to a place,
where i have to go higher than 4 stories,
and telling me to attach a string to my back and leap.
how do you think ima feel?
excited?
nah…
i might just shit my pants.
i have to be ready to even attempt to do anything like that.
it has to happen on my time,
because if i have a heart attack or pass out,
i’m going to always blame you.
often times,
we do things because other people “think its a good idea”.
when we do it,
we may get a temporary high.
highs always wear off after a while.
so we end up blaming the person(s).
why?
it helps to victimize us from the “embarrassment”.
so when it comes to wolves/hybrids/and foxes,
who have your mind all over the place like a “work wolf” did/does,
its best to just let the chips fall where they may.
if it happens; it happens
if it don’t; you got shit to do
he may just feel comfortable just emotionally dating.
that maybe him taking his first steps.
i don’t know.
i do know to never attempt to make someone do something they aren’t ready to do.
once their body,
mind,
and soul has connected to the “idea”,
then that’s when they’ll take the initiative.
you and i were there at one point.
remember?
…and that’s it.
i hope that made some kind of sense to someone out there.
it’s not for everyone.
So it sounds to me you are saying fuck it. Which is good. For me personally I think you should concentrate on finding someone who can give you what you want. There are PLENTY of masculine GAY men. And I mean gay not bi or DL.
A wise man once told me that young people when they start dating make mental lists of traits they desire in a partner. But as you get older and learn about yourself that list change into things you WON’T up with. For me personally at 25 I don’t have time for someone who is sexually confused.
Scratch that! I just read the last Work Wolf entry. Let him go. Do not entertain a friendship with him. It won’t be easy but eventually it gets better with time. At this point I pray nothing ever happens between you too. It sounds bad. But just imagine if he has caused you this much emotional stress and you haven’t done anything. What would you do if he fucks you and moves on? You couldn’t handle that. Life is short.Put on a new fur coat and walk into 2016 Fearlessly.
TRUTH!!!!!!!
It’s ALWAYS difficult to let someone go, especially when you have allowed them to take up residence in your “feelings”, heart or whateva you want to call it. Having been in a few “work wolf” situations, yours sounds a tad bit more manipulative than I’ve ever seen. I’m light weight still tripping about the Apple watch right before he calls himself checking you about behavior he encourages. Steer clear, and if he ever starts acting like he catching “real” feelings, RUN!!!!! DO NOT PASS GO, DO NOT COLLECT $200. He’s the type of attentionisto that doesn’t have to post pics on social media; he prefers to keep his fans in touching distance.
J: When did I start getting so uptight about shit?
Me: Let be honest here the reason why you’re so uptight is because what you really want is to tie Work Wolf to your damn bed, spread his legs apart then suck his dick n balls (maybe lick his bootyhole too) until you taste his pre-cum. And then slide his fat dick in between your cheeks and ride him like a pony until he burst a nut in your foxhole and then squirt out his cum on his dick to use it as lube so you can ride him again, but this time you’re going to untie him so he can grab your waist and spank your booty.
It was 3 am, you had an urge to cum and you’re thinking about Work Wolf? Who you trying to fool? I know your ass is screaming “FEED ME, FEED ME, FEED ME!!!!” Tell your bootyhole to be patient.
I’ve had similar situations with employees at my job. There have been guys I’m friendly at work with who have said and done things to make me question whether they are DL or not. Me being suspicious, I would be under the impression that they were trying to “test” me to see if I was on the team. If I were to leave there, then I would probably take action….but I’m the type that “don’t shit where I eat”.
It’s a recipe for disaster…and I’ve been down THAT road.
That being said…if it’s meant to be, it will happen. As I’ve said before, work wolf needs to be more comfortable with himself and he needs to feel HE is controlling the situation. If he’s not…he shuts down and pushes away.
Sometimes going with the flow can be hard as hell though. As I have said before I have gotten myself in a situation very much like the one you had with wolf wolf only there was sexual stuff involved and it ducked up my mind sooo much that I learned I would never do it again.
I told myself I would never mess with another curiousor straight wolf again because at the end of the day I’m the one with the broken heart and mind fucks. While I can appreciate this post because there is defiantly good advice in it, it’s just a road I’m not willing to go down again.
^and this is growth.
if you aren’t at least discreet,
and acknowledging you rock foxholes,
im probably not going to be interested.
“It’s Complicated” All of “this” is part of the did (life).
One day, you’ll reflect on these experiences, burst out laughing and say….shiiid, that futhafucka was fine, lolol. I have a roster of em that CAN GET IT.
B’nish bet not return eye contact at work, it’s going down. Protect the self, the heart has no chill.
did you give that watch back
I loved hearing about work wolf. It reminds me of what I’m going thru now. To read that others have or are going thru it was a huge relief for me. I like the “go with flow” approach. I’m going to try that!
hey jamari i hope all is well with ya. it’s been a while since i last commented on here. im sorry that some ppl came down on u so hard about work wolf; i think we’ve all been in a situation where we’ve allowed another human being (friend, family, lover, doesn’t matter) to compromise our heart and minds. but honestly jamari, WE have the power to control how much somebody gets into our hearts and minds, IF they get into it at all. just know that u aren’t alone in trying to better understand who u TRUELY are and what ur purpose in life is. finding my own purpose seems to be the battle of my life atm…but anyway i’ll always admire ur bravery and honesty. don’t allow anybody to scare u away from being vulnerable and expressing urself on ur own platform, even if it’s the parts of u that aren’t so pretty. that’s what makes us human: we’re perfectly imperfect :-]
IF they get into them, (our hearts and minds) at all. *
Taking a “going with the flow” approach is good. Just make sure you have the right equipment to steer in another direction, in case you start flowing in the wrong direction.
^love this j.