FOXMAIL

Oh my gosh Jamari I’m literally going through this experience at school. I attend this HBCU and I have been dating him since school started, we broke up beginning of last week, and we were still “friends” and still cool, at least according to him. Then Thursday afternoon everything changed for some reason, he’s not talking to me anymore, I gave him 2 days to his self and I went out drinking, and I unfortunately fell victim to the drunk texting scandal, mainly because he was watching all of my snaps, so I sent him a snap. No response. Called him. No answer. A text. He read it 30 minutes after and didn’t reply, I leave the situation alone, the next day I text him to find out I’m on the block list… Well today, I see him in the café at school with his friends and they sit in my line of view purposefully I’m guessing, one of his friends knew about us and the other one didn’t, he is kind of in the closet still, and for some reason he finally decides to unfollow me on Instagram, now keep in mind it’s been like 4 days since he blocked me but yet he still watches everything I do on snapchat.i was there for him when he was depressed and having bad thoughts. And when he didn’t have any money I supported our relationship, buying him stuff, paying for our dates and food. I was even there when he thought he contracted hiv from an ex. I still love him even though he’s being a total ass. I’ve been having thoughts of popping up on his ass.

What do I do? 

MY ANSWER…
Continue reading “f0xmail: My Ex Has Blocked Me On Everything! Help!” →

FOXMAIL

For about almost two years now I have been dealing with an issue that I finally got the courage to write to you about. I am 26 years old and I have absolutely no sex drive, yep my libido is down the toilet. To give you a little background info I have year around allergies that have been really bad the last couple years to the point that I had to start allergy shots weekly, and take claritin and sudafed decongestant everyday just to be able to function. I know sudafed d can lower your libido but I have to take it. My sex drive has been diminishing the last couple years but now my penis doesn’t even really get hard anymore, whenever I get an erection now my penis gets hard for less than a minute and goes right back limp. This is TMI but whenever I fap my penis doesn’t even get fully erect and when it is time to release my semen volume is low and watery. I go through periods of no fapping to see if that will help but it doesn’t, I even have taken maca root pills for a few months and they don’t work. I don’t what to talk to my doctor because I am so embarrassed. I know this fox mail was so TMI but I need help asap.

Any suggestions on how to get my sex drive back Jamari and the foxhole?

SN: please be serious it took a lot for me to write this.

MY ANSWER…

Continue reading “f0xmail: My Pipe Doesn’t Work Anymore. Help!” →

well today is steven beck’s birthday.
“happy birthday steven!”
i got a f0xmail this morning about steven and i couldn’t wait to post it.
as you know,
foxhole fav,
kellon deryck has gotten a boost in popularity.
he needs to thank amiyah scott for putting him further on the map.
he has been the talk of many forests.
well it seems steven beck may also be involved in this scheme as well.
this is what was shoved into my box…
Continue reading “f0xmail: Kellon Deryck, Amiyah Scott… and Steven Beck?” →

FOXMAIL

Yoooooo

Whats up Jamari?? As you know I have been a loyal member of the foxhole since the beginning. I check the site daily and you have definitely helped me through some situations. I’m kinda going through a situation with a guy and I just want your insight.

So I met this guy a few weeks ago and immediately felt something that I haven’t felt for anyone before. I really like him and he says he likes me too but doesn’t show that much attention. I have been entertaining other guys and he got mad about it. He basically doesn’t trust me and said we could only be friends. I laid everything out and told him exactly how I felt about him but he didn’t respond. I deleted his # and our text history and was never going to talk to him again.

He hit me up 2 days later and we had a good convo but he is sending mixed signals. Idk if I should pursue him or just move on. He is the perfect guy…100% my type but I don’t wanna look thirsty or like a fool.

What should I do!?

Thanks!

MY ANSWER…

Continue reading “f0xmail: I Want Him, But The Way Those “Mixed Signals” Are Set Up…” →

FOXMAIL

Hey Jamari,
Been lurking in the foxhole for years – needless to say I enjoy everything I read.
Thank you for your authenticity and for your insight. Just by being you, you’re not only entertaining and informing folk, you’re helping folk.
Getting down to it, I need a third opinion on a situation I’m in.
Ok, so … we all have a thing right? My thing has always been height. I’m 26, 5’11, and am really only attracted to guys taller than me. Don’t know what it is but it’s always been that way. I feel like there’d be a thrill in topping a tall guy and I’ve always made the joke that I’d never let an itty bitty baby climb my back. I am equal opportunity however and have found myself attracted to (and talking to) dark, light, wide, narrow, masculine, feminine but the deal breaker has always been height. I’ve liked random athletes and celebrities and once I discovered they were shorter than me, it’s like a switch flipped. Instant turn-off.
Also, I’m like the last gay virgin. I have always wanted the first time to be with a dude I was in a relationship with. I have missed some good FINE piece but at least they were straight up and let me know they just wanted to fuck with no pretense. I don’t want the first time to be a random I get sprung over.
Fast forward to today. I recently made a friend in a colleague who I assumed was straight. After he left the company for a better position, we got closer and started hanging out. I’m not really flamboyant so after a couple months, he asked me if I was gay. I admitted I was and he admitted he was bi and that he only befriended me because he thought he could smash. Negative. He’s like 5’9. On top of that, I do not find him attractive at all. What’s the problem then? His energy, his aura … is sexy AF!!! Now that we know about each other, he’s always making comments and jokes about having me. I laugh it off but I think about it. He’s so confident it’s sexy. And sometimes I even find myself jacking off to the thought of him. But, I repeat, I don’t like him! It’s like I’m just super horny. He’s asked me if I would ever consider a relationship with him – we’ve had very candid convos – and I admitted I wouldn’t. Before that, I even got pissy drunk one night, got horny, and found my way over to his condo. He felt me up but he didn’t take advantage – said he wanted me to make that decision in my right mind.
Should I give him a chance? Shade is, I really wanna fuck and get fucked but I always I thought it’d be with a tall guy who I was actually attracted-attracted to. He really is good people tho. I just don’t want to feel like I am compromising what I want…or thought I’d have? Could it be he just happens to be present and showing me attention? My BFF thinks I’m being superficial and acting spoiled. My sis says I’m just worried that after holding out for so long, nothing else will come around.

Jamari,
what would you do?
Foxhole,
what would y’all do?

MY ADVICE…

Continue reading “f0xmail: He Isn’t My “Ideal”, but I May Want Give Him My Virginity. Help!” →

FOXMAIL

What’s up Jamari!

I first just want to tell you how much I love your blog. Keep up the great work!

I am writing you because I need your advice and I value your opinion.

I am a 25 year old shy, very private gay black man. Within the past 2 years I came to terms with my sexuality personally. I’m not out as of yet, but assumptions have been made my entire life at least since I was like 7 or 8 ( that is the earliest I remember being called names, given weird looks, and being made fun of). I knew I was just different from my brothers. I didn’t know what it was at that young age but I felt and knew I was different. Everywhere I go my sexuality is always a topic of interest whether it’s a a job, school, amongst professors, friends, and people I don’t know. It annoys me b/c I am so much more than my sexuality. I am truly a great person.

I’ve always been asked where is my girlfriend and had people pick and pry into my private life which I hate! I am a private person. Other questions I’ve been asked were Do I like girls? Are you celibate? Do my roommate talk to girls? Why am I so quiet? (The person said I must be gay because never have anything to say LOL smh) Do I treat girls when I take them out to dinner? And that is just a few. Yeah ridiculous! But all of those questions come from those people who have made fun of me and etc.
 I call those questions test. Depending on how I answer the person asking the ? would make their assumptions about me.
A bunch of indirect ?s seeking a direct answer. ( direct answer meaning YES I am gay)

I don’t have anyone to confide in b/c I have trust issues. I truly believe there are more Curious people than Caring. Letting people in makes me vulnerable and scares me. They can take what I reveal and use it against me if they want.

 My relationship with my parents is cool but never had that close mother/son or father/son bond with them.  I don’t really have a close relationship with my siblings to the point where I would openly talk about my feelings and problems. We get along and I enjoy their company but we never have heart to hearts. I don’t trust them like that b/c a lot of my suffering started at home with them and if I piss them off they are quick to press my buttons especially the one I’m writing about now.

I have friend in California who I talk to on occasions. We have been cool for years. I remember him trying to hook me up several times with girls he know and girls we went to high school with but deep down I was not trying to talk to those chicks. I think he knows. We had a conversation one night about how he don’t understand the lifestyle but also don’t care if someone close to him was gay. (His sister is gay). I felt at that moment that what he was saying was directed towards me. I was too afraid to speak up to tell him.

Currently my other friend and I have been hanging out. He stays with his girlfriend who is cool as well. I thought about telling them too but my friend is religious and he and his girlfriend have spoken negatively about homosexuality. They are cool people but very closed minded.

I know once people start to find out or I guess once I confirm what others have been thinking all along a lot is going to change. Personally I don’t think I could be cool with folks who would talk bad about me the way my friends talk about other gay people either on TV or who we see in person.

At this point everything in my life has come to a standstill and the only thing that continues to come up is my sexuality or that’s the only thing that stands out b/c its fresh on my mind. Maybe it’s a sign? IDK

My question is,
What do you think I should do?

MY ADVICE…

Continue reading “f0xmail: Everyone Thinks I’m Gay. Help!” →