The Thin Line Between “Down Low” and “Dumb Ass”.

can i be honest about something?
this has been bothering me…

ive been reading the blogs today about this whole jason collins thing.
this is why i’m pro “being low key with ya shit”.
that statement about being brave pisses me off.
you’re brave when your ass wakes up in the morning and walks out the door.
you’re also brave being alive and dealing with the trials and tribulations that come with life.
you don’t have to come out the closet to “be true to yourself”,
“be real”,
or “show you have self esteem”.
people are just nosy and want to know who is gay.
people just want to know who people are fuckin in their bedroom.
aside from that,
i have one question that has been bothering me:

what does d/l men and unprotected sex have to do with each other?

every other comment on some black vixen dominated message board/blog is:

the great d/l man and him passing aids to women

in my opinion,
that isn’t a d/l issue.
that is a dumbass issue.
there are men on the d/l who use condoms.
there are out men who don’t use condoms.
there are twice as many men who cheat on women,
with only women,
not using condoms either.
people just don’t like to use condoms.
whether it is straight or gay,
people like to get lost inside the pussy/ass.

going raw feels good.
it isn’t the most politically correct statement,
but its the truth.
some idiots see a sexy person and want to feel what their insides feel like.
everyone is always blaming down low men for this,
but if you look at rude or x tube,
many straight men are fuckin’ hoes without condoms.
should i direct you to the foxxx i put up today?
maybe i’m missing something,
but i don’t get the correlation.
people are co-signing the shit like a bunch of dumb asses.
one mo thing…
i don’t get why everyone is comparing jason collins and kerry rhodes.
last i checked,
kerry didn’t ASK to be exposed.
glitter balls did it in a sad attempt for publicity.
if that situation didn’t happen,
it would have been “kerry who?”.
seriously i love my people,
but i’m convinced black people are fuckin’ stupid.
i’m baffled today.
some of us don’t think,
we assume,
and then start playing the blame game.
get it together.

49 thoughts on “The Thin Line Between “Down Low” and “Dumb Ass”.

  1. My point is, don’t come for my faith when its been the only thing I could lean on when I was going through because of shit I’ve experienced in this lifestyle. Especially when you have no other rebuttal other than its oppressive to you because of how someone used it to make you feel small in the past. That’s for anyone.

    The whole fact that no one sees the problem with Broussard being reprimanded for expressing how he feels on the platform he was given is crazy to me.

    If his words would’ve been supportive, no one would’ve cared about alienating the millions of people that are against homosexuality.

    That’s alarming to me. What happens when this method of punishing people’s right to free speech is used to support an agenda that disenfranchises you?

    1. TV is not his platform. He works for and represents ESPN. If he wanted to spout off about God and the Bible, he could have gone on Pat Robertson’s show. Other commentators who work for ESPN have been reprimanded in the past for comments that were deemed inappropriate. Maybe you will remember Rob Parker and his comments about RG3 not being a real black man. He was suspended and his contract {keyword being “contract”) wasn’t renewed.

      I wasn’t offended by what Broussard said. I’m more offended by how many times he trots out his sources and is still wrong about possible trades and personnel changes pending in sports. But ESPN has the right to decide what is appropriate content on their network.

      Free speech only pertains to what the government can or can’t do about your right to speak freely. Freedom of speech doesn’t cover Broussard in this situation.

    2. I think JAY got the name Jamari FOX confused with FOXnews.It’s not about attacking his right to speak freely.I don’t know why your getting such an orgasm from this debate.Of course we’re going to be irritated by what he said.He’s dissing us and our lifestyle.Something we all know we can’t control.If I was a blonde and someone said all blondes are stupid or blonde hair is ugly, I’m gonna say your a douche bag for dissing something that I have naturally.It’s called being human.I’m not gonna go “you don’t like the blonde hair that grows out of my head, that’s okay because you have a right to say that.”Sorry but that response isn’t human.Humans aren’t Stepford wives.You sound like an old southern Hick Republican.

  2. Lmao! I love the dark undertones of that narration. If you had ended it with “A change is gonna come” like Mama Dee it would’ve been better. Lmao

    There is no repression when you’ve come to accept what you believe in your heart. Some of the random comments my parents made in the past make more sense now.

    The truth is, I’ve been very indifferent to a lot of the recent topics.

    I don’t care Kerry Rhodes got played and is now in a glass closet.

    I don’t care that this dude came out. I got plenty of laughs off pics on instagram that were digs at them.

    A lot of gays talk down on religion, but what do they believe in? What are their values and beliefs? They only crack open a bible to try and discredit it. Then we see all these dudes out here that are lost. “Out and proud”, front in center at Sizzle, but still lost.

    Tajan says religious people are the meanest and most hateful people, never willing to help their fellow man unless they can make them feel like shit.

    Lawd, I could shout the same thing verbatim about gays from the mountain tops. Lol

    Based on my experience, I’d trust a “Bible Thumper” I don’t know at all, before I’d trust a gay or bi man (out/discreet/dl).

    You can call hat self hating all you want, but some of you wouldn’t trust them either.

  3. Between my busy work schedule and my new workout regime, I don’t get to the foxhole until late and I miss all the good fireworks. To say it goes down in here is a understatement. This debate is better than anything on CNN, this forum has some of the smartest people I think I have seen on any Blog. With that being said, I do not understand how so many Christians feel its their right to tell you how you should be living your life when we all fall so short of what we are supposed to do. By nature we are all flawed from the prettiest to the ugliest, but we are all precious in his sight. Personally, I have no time to worry about anybody or what or who they are sleeping with, Sunday is fun day rest day for me, I haven’t been to church in years except for rare occasions or for funerals, so I am rusty on all the Bible verses, and besides it was written so long ago, I’m sure much of it was lost in translation and has many inaccuracies and probably alot of fables. At the end of the day, we have to live and let live.

    Most religious people I know, are the meanest and most hateful, never wanting to help their fellow man unless they are able to make them feel like shit on their bottom of their shoe. I have seen so much religious tomfoolery in the last couple of days between the Kerry Rhodes story and now this. I say worry about getting your ticket for Heaven, and don’t worry about my ticket to Hell since you say that’s were Im going for liking men anyway, you cant change it, so why take years off of your life. Hell if you dont agree with it dont let it trouble your mind. I have heard so many ignorant people say the Gay Agenda, WTF, no one can turn you Gay as no one can turn me Str8. These homophobes are usually idiots and have lots of dirty secrets. I can bet my bottom dollar that this ass-clown probably has done many drugs, drink liquor, cheats on his wife, beats his wife, gamble, you name it but he has a problem with a man who likes dick calling himself a Christian. Everybody just live your best life and treat everybody fairly and with RESPECT!

  4. All of this religious talk just reminds me of something my mother would say here and there, “All of those who think they’re going to heaven ain’t going.”

    People crack me up when they start quoting the Bible. Be careful though. There is a lot in the Bible that you can hang yourself on. People like to cherry-pick versus from the Bible in order to support their opinions. Either you accept everything in the Bible as the gospel truth, or you allow yourself to be critical of all that is in it.

    1. That’s why don’t read the bible that much.Lord forgive me. I go to church like once a year. Lemme lone lol

  5. The platform Broussard used to announce his personal beliefs was inappropriate, plain and simple.

    He’s got a right to believe anything he wants regarding homosexuality. No one is begrudging him that for that.

    His mistake came when he used a national television platform (with millions of DIFFERENT ppl watching) to make his personal beliefs the center of topic when it wasn’t even about him! Its about what happens to Jason Collins and pro basketball in the aftermath of a historic revelation. There is a worthy discussion to be had there and he made it about HIM.

    Who cares if he is personally rattled by another man’s sex life. No one curr.

    1. I’m with you, finally someone gets what I’m saying. Did that shit on ESPN. That’s what was really wrong. Talk that shit in your home. That’s like Keyshia talking about Michelle on 106&park or something. Wrong platform to say something like that. It’s some shit you gotta keep to yourself.

  6. @The Man: If people want to use their religion as reasoning as to why they feel same sex marriage and homosexuality is wrong that’s their right.

    If you’re so secure with yourself, why would you care if they like it or not?

    1. As I said before, it’s some things you don’t say.

      I AM secure with myself. I don’t really care what they think or if they like it, and not to mention I’m not coming out the closet EVER, so I will never have to worry about that.

      That’s why Mike Wallace is going to get punished, you can’t say anything you want. Yea, we have freedom of speech, but like my prof said, free speech is limited, believe it or not. It’s like seeing a dude with a big hole in his draws, and yelling it out, or seeing a female with her tracks out.That’s shit you just don’t say. People don’t get it.

  7. It’s not about being politically correct it’s about being a dumb ass.

    What Broussard said was fucking stupid added to the fact that he used Christianity to form his asinine opinion makes it worse.

    I don’t respect any opinion based on any sura, scripture, or science used to promote bigotry, hate, or ignorance.

    To sum it all up: Fuck them and their petty-ass false gods that they pray to getting this bullshit from.

    People can say what they want–they do it all the time–but it pisses me off when people get called out on their own bullshit and then wanna hide behind their religious beliefs, as if they are being attacked for who they are or their dumb shit cannot be criticized.

    Self righteous bastards can suck a sick dick and die (they do anyway, that’s why they mad).

    How many Christian little boys and girls have committed suicide after receiving societal hate for being Christian from every corner?

    Christians nor Christianity is above reproach.

    Fuck the other side, the opposition–especially if they are on some superstitious bigotry bullshit.

    Fuck em.

    1. Isn’t it great to be an American?

      You’re allowed to feel that way!

      They can say fuck your AIDS infested, lonely, fun boy, sissy existence of a life.

      That’s the twisted beauty of it all…for me at least.

      1. Repression builds aggression.

        One day you gotta let all of that twisted beauty out of the closet.

        Have we not seen X-Men: The Last Stand?

        Don’t let the darkness consume you.

        This is your first and final warning.

  8. Also, I was reading that the main mastermind behind the MLK branch of the Civil Rights Movement was a gay by the name of Bayard Rustin. He was the chief organizer and strategist behind the March on Washington. He could have been “brave”, announced his gayness to the world, and risked destroying the whole movement. But instead, he chose to be wise and remained discreet so that change could come! Again, don’t misread and think I’m saying people who “come out” are a problem. What I am saying is every individual has things to weigh in their own lives. Unless you know what they are, miss me with the naive B.S.! For those who come out, great. But for those who choose to remain discreet, so what?!

    1. I have been an avid reader of your blog Jamari for many months now. This is my first time commenting.

      In response to Butter, Bayard Rustin was openly gay. MLK knew he was gay and many leaders around MLK knew Bayard was gay. Those around MLK pressured him to get rid of Bayard, but MLK had resisted. Eventually, MLK gave in to the pressure. So Bayard was “brave” in many ways. He wasn’t afraid to be who he was and he was quite outspoken. Back then, people didn’t publicly announce their sexuality, but many around Bayard knew he was gay.

      1. I always thought he didn’t hide it, as in the inner circle new, but at the same time didn’t announce it to the whole world. And especially not to those outside of the movement.

        However, thanks for the correction.

    1. And that too. So many ppl quote the English, failing to understand the original language is Hebrew, which reads oh so differently then the English. And consequently, a wholly different meaning. In fact, I don’t even think the KJV was even translated from the Hebrew. But there is a movement, still somewhat quite, that is about to shed light on that as well (even being embraced by prominent Orthodox figures).

    2. Leviticus 18:22 (New International Version) – Bible Gateway’Do not have sexual relations with a man as one does with a woman; that is detestable.

      Since we are quoting the bible, do you not wear cotton and eat that shrimp buffet at Red Lobster too?

  9. What’s so wrong about being sensitive to what other people think? As long as you’re not lying to yourself, is it a problem? A high school classmate of mine came out to his mom. Was his so-called “bravery” worth the tear in their relationship? As far as I know, a tear that still hasn’t been mended. Btw, this is the same person who was deathly afraid of so many other things! Discretion is the better part of valor.

    Reading the situation and making the appropriate decision for you is not cowardness. It’s prudence! There are many fools that have been counted as brave btw.

    Not saying Jason is a fool… I too agree his stance, towards the end of his career as it is, will be impactful. But don’t disparage others.

  10. I never understood why people, specifically black people, think downlow men don’t use protection o_O Isn’t the majority of straight porn bareback anyways? Lol.

    1. Read for filth.

      SMH@ open rebellion against god.

      Religious fanatics always gotta be extra.

      Gays are not that special.

      Guess it’s safe to say Milk Dud Head ain’t #teamlightskin

      1. I don’t get why everyone is so up in arms that people on the opposing side are voicing their opinions.

        That’s their right. I can respect someone who stands by their opinion rather than someone that tries to be politically correct.

        I don’t believe more people coming out is going to magically make people more accepting of homosexuals.

        I can honestly see both sides of the argument.

      2. Jay it’s some things you don’t say. I’m tired of explaining this to you guys. You can’t just say everything that’s on your mind. people get hurt that way, and I’m not talking about emotionally.

  11. It’s a great moment for young people to see people they admire do things like this…especially young gays. I would agree that folks who come out shouldn’t always get a cookie, but since Jason had the balls to come out and do something most don’t really have the guts to do, yeah, people are going to hat tip. I think that’s why people are comparing Jason and Kerry. Jason did something Kerry can’t do, even when Kerry was caught red-handed. Kerry is sloppy, whether he asked for it or not. Why pose for those photographs? Why is he operating his life in a way that almost invites the situations that have happened to him?

    That said: Who cares if someone wants to know if you’re gay? Why is that bad? Being gay isn’t a bad thing, no? Say you’re into dudes and keep it moving. If you’re living in a place where that could hurt you, articulate that, or even better, consider moving. I’ve said this a hundred times, don’t expect strangers to keep your secrets. You’ll get into trouble every time.

    1. ^like i said before,
      kerry was stupid.
      he should have shut up and let it blow over.
      it happened.
      i won’t condemn him for that.

      jason wanted to come out.
      kerry didn’t.
      jason wanted the acclimation that came with.
      kerry wanted to live his life discreetly.
      all alleged since he hasn’t approved/denied the allegations.
      jason wanted that life.
      that’s okay,
      but we are all brave living and doing what we need to do to survive.
      nowadays some people are coming out for a check,
      a reality show,
      and a book deal.
      one would argue that jason was on his last leg of playing in the nba.
      he is currently a free agent.
      13 seasons in.
      what else to do?

      1. If Kerry wanted to live his life so discreetly, those pictures never would have been taken to begin with. He’s an idiot. If you’re going to be discreet, at least have the intelligence to do it properly.

        He reminds me of John Travolta.

        You can’t have it both ways…you can’t want discretion, but then, knowing you’re a celebrity, participate in things that obviously will you flagged.

        As far as bravery is concerned, you don’t get kudos for doing what you’re suppose to do. Getting up in the morning and going to work is not being brave. Doing something amazing that could cost you professionally or personally is BRAVE. That said I don’t think it will cost him much, but telling the world who you are when everyone keeps saying that it’s never going to work and your career is going to ruined is a commendable act.

        Jason, nor you or I will understand how many people will be inspired by that. Not just coming out of the closet, but in the pursuit of always trying to do the right thing and being true to who you really are.

        1. i like you mdb.
          a good respectable debate.
          thank you for sharing your thoughts.
          i do agree with a majority of what you have to say.
          we can argue that queen latifah also lives her life the same as kerry.
          she was caught up on that boat hugging that chick.
          sure she wasn’t outed the same way kerry was.
          who knows why kerry did what he did.
          you or i will never understand,
          but i’m hoping one day i can pick his brain and see what the devil was he thinking.

          jason’s career is already kinda over tho.
          he is pretty much 13 years in the league.
          he is 34 years old and one leg is already out the industry.
          i’m sure it did help others feel inspired.
          i won’t deny that.
          does he really speak for “us” though?
          i feel like no one will really care unless its someone they can relate too.
          then again,
          like you said we don’t know the impact.
          we will have to wait and see.
          already people are throwing him under the bus over the fiance issue so it may all get overshadowed.

      2. “Getting up in the morning and going to work is not being brave” I know that right my dude.

        You can take pics and still be discreet. Like you can take pics of you and your boo cuddled up with each other in the crib and shit like that. That’s always cute lol.

    1. ^no offense to anyone who is out,
      but some out dudes tend to be more ratchet.
      they are out so they feel invisible.
      im not saying down low dudes can’t be ratchet,
      but everyone has ratchet tendencies and they shouldn’t be the spokesperson for death and disease lol

      1. Yeah there seems to be a common misconception that
        DL = Raw sex.

        They’ve probably been the most careful in my experience.

        Now I did meet this one dude who was PRETENDING to be DL and wanted to go raw but I wouldn’t let him.

        Come to find out he threw raw sex parties for a living.

        1. ^while these chicks blaming the d/l man,
          their boyfriend is breakin’ his dick off in the next door neighbor pussy when her back is turned.
          ol girl is getting skeeted all up in her guts too.
          i know way too many straight guys who fuck girls without condoms.
          keep on blaming the d/l man if they want too.

          1. these niggas out here see these hoes,
            wearing gucci and christian loubie,
            looking like a video vixens with fat asses and big titties.
            the first thing he is thinking is he wants to get up in her pussy.
            in the heat of the moment,
            he fucks her without a condom on.
            what he don’t know is this chick probably got full blown aids.
            she is bitter and doesn’t tell him because she hates all men.

      2. I disagree. I know more responsible gays. Condoms are always used. Let us not stereotype. I can’t count on one hand how many times I have done it raw.

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