f0xmail: To Move Or Not To Move (That Is The Question?)

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Hey Jamari! I love your site and I am just getting out of a 7 year relationship. I never thought I would be single at the age of 26. Anyway I am looking to move away from my current state and I was thinking of just moving to Houston Texas. I am not being taken seriously because I am not in the state.

Do you think I should move to that state without my job or wait?

MY ANSWER…
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f0xmail: Could I Get Over My X By Getting Under Some Dack?

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Im a newbie here,
but first let me say you give some GREAT FREAKING ADVICE!!!!!

OMG!!!

so question how do you get over someone?

like im really really struggling to get over my ex cap (im a pisces) its PISSING me off  that everyone keeps saying: the best way to get over someone is to get under somebody else… ugh been there tried that but im not over him but apparently hes over me… ugh! do you have any advice for me?????

MY ANSWER…
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f0xmail: Thank U Letter (3)

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Hi Jamari,

Been busy at work lately so haven’t had the chance to comment as I would like too, but I’ve definitely been reading daily. I just read your entry “Everything Seems so Perfect in the Snow” when i got to work and it just struck a cord with me. You see, I’ve met a guy and I think I’m falling in love for the first time. You’re the only gay friend I have lol so I hope you don’t mind me randomly telling you about it. Anyway, he’s not perfect. No six pack or big muscles, but cute and most of all treats me like I’ve never been treated before. Everyday he tells me how much I mean to him and that he loves me. The other day he had me crying with the things he was saying to me. I NEVER do that. I’m not the type of person that can be vulnerable in front of someone. He also loves God and stays in church. He’s not perfect by far, but he’s everything I honestly could ask for. And the thing you said in the post about the two guys kissing….I’ve have never been kissed like this guy kisses me. The other dudes I had been with made me not even like kissing. They made me think I was bad at it. Turns out, they just all sucked at it lol. And just to throw something in there, this guy is a genuine FREAK. We haven’t had sex yet and he said he will wait as long as I want, but with the way he talks to me sometimes that wont be too much longer! Most importantly, he loves me for exactly who I am. He told me he loved everything about me, and that I didn’t need to change a thing. Now I know I’m an attractive guy, but I still have self esteem issues. However, I never feel self conscious when I’m with him. This is the first guy I’ve been with where I felt I didn’t need to change anything. He works. Has his own place. And wants to buy me food when we go out even though I got to remind him I’m still a man and can hold my own. This guy has touched me life in a special way in a short period of time.

The reason I’m saying all this is because I was about to give up on finding someone. I was coming to the realization that I would just be alone with some hookups in between. After all, I had been alone a long time and had gotten used to it. This guy has shown me that doesn’t have to be so. Now, who knows, we may not make it, but at least I know I’ve experienced love and I could find it again. But I feel this guy is the one. I’m telling you this because I was getting apathetic about love but it found me when I was least expecting it. When I needed someone the most, this guy came into my life.

I’m telling you J, if it happened for me, I know it will happen for you. Although I’ve never talked to you or laid eyes on you I know that you are a great person, and you deserve a great person. He will come along. Man, I can’t even explain how much reading your blog has helped me. All those months when I was sitting at home, out of work, depressed, struggling with my sexuality, reading your posts was a godsend. I really feel a part of this community even though I don’t know you or the other commenters personally. We are all kind of like brothers in the struggle. I’ve really learned so much about this lifestyle. I’ve learned that everyone in this life is not some caricature. I’ve learned being gay does not make me less of a man. You are a special person Jamari, and God touched my heart this morning and made me sit down and right this to you. Keep your head up. Keep doing your thing. Don’t ever give up or get discouraged (even when that bitch at work is trying you lol). Most of all, don’t feel that you have to compromise your standards to have someone. I can tell you have a lot to give and for that, a man needs to be prepared to give you a lot. At the same time, be open enough to get to know a guy that may not fit all your physical or stylistic ideals. I gave this guy a chance when the old me might have just passed on him and its really been worth it.

Take care

MY ANSWER…

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f0xmail: I Think This “Lookin Ass Nig” At The Gym Wants Me. Help?

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I see this guy at the gym. I see that he occasionally shoots me a few looks, nothing strange, but he just looks at me as I am working out. As he is about to leave, he takes a look back at me. Again, I don’t think much of it, but I leave soon after he does.

Well, I end up at a stop light and he pulls up next to me. He looks over at me again, but I didn’t say or do anything. Against my general judgment, I decide to post an ad on Craigslist in the m4m missed connections section. I gave a general description of a guy where many guys could fit the description.

Well, I get a response and the guy tells me what he was wearing, but he also makes a mention that he is straight as well. I ask a few more questions and it is indeed the same guy who was looking at me in the gym. My question for you is what do you think of the situation?

MY ANSWER…

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w0lftailz: My Coworker Wolf’s Bunz Are Bigger Than Yours

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My coworker.
Thought of your site when I snapped this.
Haha, pics don’t do my boy justice.
Plus we goin on a trip together (with this girlfriend too, smh) this year,
so I get to stare at that bubble bunz even more…

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f0xmail: I Want My Fine Co-Worker! Now! Now! NOW! Help!

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“Hey Jay! I haven’t been as active on the site as I should. My book, school, n work has officially taken ova my life! I hope all is well at home and at the NEW JOB : )

 Ok, so I never believed in love at first sight. So I went into work today like regula degula shit. I get to the register and spoke to my female coworker and we was just catching up/talking shit. So I had to run down stairs to get something and JA.MAR.II, as I am walking I spot this FIONEEE ASS wolf they have as the stores greeter.
 
I was looking very good today, fresh cut beard shaped up and ALL and I saw him gazing at me. And I just blurted out “Hey, Wassup? How r u?” He responds “Hey. How are you doing”? Jamari I am shy but not bashful, but I’ve never met a guy who commanded a room without saying a word. It was like we erased everyone for a minute or at least I did.
 
He’s very short/my height 5’8-5’9
Lite tone
His hair is brown but his goatee is blonde
His weight is up >>>>
This Justin Combs meets Braylon Edwards
 
Back to topic he and I ended up working together alone in the room today. So I seized the opportunity to get acquainted. He’s 23, in college like me, drives, hasn’t mentioned a girlfriend, and seems like a all together nice dude. Calm soul. However I don’t know  if he’s down. His eye contact is awesome, he looks me directly in my eye. He smiles a lot, and he has the sexiest light voice. He and I both are masculine and he could very well think that I wanna be his homeboy. But I have more than that in mind.
I need some advice on how to get him to open up to me when were alone.
Idw feel this way about a straight guy you know…”

MY ANSWER…

 

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