Nobody Roots for Goliath

i’m here to be opinionated and messy.
i’m also here to be emotional and a depressed mess too.
shit,
i’m even here to offend.
this site wasn’t made to be perfect.
this is the one place i don’t want to be perfect.
the intent wasn’t to befriend other bloggers in hopes of social climbing.
i could care less if kid fury,
b scott,
funky dineva,
or necole bitchie don’t like me.
not my problem.
even the celebs that i talk about,
there wasn’t/isn’t an insane need to kiss ass for their acceptance.
you know what truly inspires me?…

when i can be a complete fuckin mess with the foxhole.
it’s real life.
that is also the best feeling in the world.
i’ve been hurting and in emotional pain.
i’m not this fox who only wants to fuck sexy ass wolves.
i am a complex fox with real emotions.
coming on here and laying it all out,
while getting good/bad feedback,
has allowed me to stop from killing myself on more than one occasion.
i’m just going to be honest.
if i ever had to edit or adjust who i am,
i wouldn’t feel joy doing this anymore.
i can’t be my honest authentic self trying to fit in with society.

it don’t work that way

i’m a fucked up mess,
who makes mistakes and does dumb shit,
but this site is helping me find who i am.
for some of you,
it is also doing the same.
some things i was iffy about,
because of the foxhole,
i have come to fully accept.
not my “role” tho.
you can fuck right off because i enjoy being a fox.
i’m sure,
like i am,
that you’re tired of these perfect social media attentionistos/nistas.
they only show the good sides until their enemies shows the bad.
whatever we are doing tho,
i pray we can continue on together.
if not,
i’m glad to have known you for that brief period.
now move out the way so those who fully support me can get room.

i’m not here to be liked.
i’m here to be interesting.

15 thoughts on “Nobody Roots for Goliath

  1. “i’m not here to be liked.
    i’m here to be interesting.”
    -Jamari Fox

    ☝🏾That right there is your mission Jamari, it perfectly sums up you, this site, and your vibe. I always say this but this place you created for isn’t to be perfect or put posts to again attention. This diary of sorts is for you to express every emotion the good and bad. What I have noticed on here lately is people coming out of pocket and being intentionally hurtful in their comments towards you, not giving constructive feedback but trying to get at you. Nobody is perfect and I think at times a lot of us seems to forget that, this site can be a escape from the real world at times with certain posts.

    While I’ve enjoyed the posts about meat/buns, attentistos, Work Wolf, skincare/fashion, and etc What I enjoy the most is when you are being your true Authentic self on here because I related to you a lot. I don’t also agree with your opinions of everything and I don’t have to to like you or this space. You don’t kiss ass and if someone on here RESPECTFULLY asks you to thinking about a certain topic in a different way you always try to or asks questions to to get to that point.

    There is nothing wrong with you, your ideas, or your expectations.

    Love ya and will continue to rock with ya.

    1. Especially that cancerous venom gutter butt snipe social justice wimp Brent Christopher who, on occasion, has lashed out like the little grumpy troll that it is. Then to sit here and say that I was in a dark place when in reality, I just have an ice cold heart towards its kind. If anything, I like to see that special snowflake in the summer where I would destroy it. Too graphic? My bad. I just don’t fucking like Brent Christopher! It is officially my mortal enemy till eternity.

  2. And this honesty is why I love you. My takeaway from all of this is that when it comes to being a blogger, you have an audience and that audience are mostly African American or men of color who are gay or bisexual. In my opinion, you have found an audience; however, bloggers/internet personalities like a B.Scott or Kid Fury may have or not isolated their minority audience to appeal to a wide arrange of people in order to grow “their brand.”

    The reason why is because of money, monetization, appearances, and also provide talking points about their views on sexuality and race as well as religion. Those three things to me are always an agenda that these mainstream black bloggers tend to provide when in reality, they are mostly looking for a hug from the white majority or caucasian people.

    As I have e-mailed you about other blogs, I have said that they were “whitewashed” or completely have been pandering to a full Caucasian audience when their core base was african american or Black American audience. What kills me about these black blogs at times is that they don’t really give a good logical, analytical, or anecdotal point that can create a conversation or make it very interesting. Those are the type of writers I go for.

    Now I understand that popularity is what most if not all of these Black Bloggers want to be, but is it worth it? If that answer is yes, then I say this: learn Marketing and Business while learning English and Communication. You CANNOT and I repeat CANNOT just major in Communications without taking classes in Marketing, Business Management/Administration, Advertising, and English although English is a prerequisite. My point is that journalism writing has been scrutinized by political correctness. In fact, it is political correctness has made it hard for some bloggers to really have a voice or to have an opinion.

    Finally, you have an honest outlook on everything. It’s your truth. Your opinion. Yes, people may disagree, but for me, I value honesty. And Jamari, if my post is hella long, then pardon me for thinking like a black scholar with a business mindset because that’s what I’ve studied in college was marketing and project management.

    1. ^please!
      i love when the foxhole leaves long comments that provide great points.
      i read it twice because it was really good.
      now it leads me to wonder…

      how can I achieve success with the foxhole without selling out or losing myself?

      companies want to act like you need to be perfect in order to get ads.
      it’s really alarming the lengths and hoops i have to go through just to do my passion full time.

  3. Another great post. My paternal grandmother was half German. She used to tell us youngsters that pain was simply weakness leaving the body. ;-). Love you all.

  4. You’re actually doing a great job balancing all of these things on your site. I appreciate your honesty, and views even if I don’t always completely agree. That’s because you seem honest in your opinions. They don’t feel predictable/forced, or neatly tied up in a box to please a set group of people like on Fox News or MSNBC. Even the way you write and format your post, and the gifs you use, makes this place feel right. I think you would be perfect for this Podcasting era right now.

  5. We all are here to live “our” life to the fullest. If you are confident and comfortable in who you are, people will hate you for it. Once you come to the point where the only opinion that matters is yours, life will improve! Social media and the entertainment industry is nothing but smoke and mirrors. They deal with the same emotional issues that we do, it’s worst though because they are under a microscope.

  6. Don’t lose your edge. If you go soft, the vultures will pick your bones clean. In fact, you need to hit a little harder.

    1. ^like charley said on “queen sugar”,
      pain fuels me.
      it has always been why i continue to climb to higher heights.
      without it,
      i wouldn’t know what small victories tastes like.

      1. Now that you said that, I share the same sentiment. In spite of always feeling like I’m always on an uphill battle to happiness in every aspect of my life, I often forget to look back at the things I’ve overcome in order to be who/where I am now. Lately I’ve been trying to appreciate the little victories. It’s been hard, but it has to be done. A little glimmer of hope is better than none.

  7. Interesting fontation. Ya know. I used to have terrible self esteem. Even when guys would try to holla at me all the time I would run clean away. I couldn’t look myself in the mirror because I thought I was unworthy. I hated myself, my life and because of that I assumed everyone hated me and thought I was hideous. Such a fragile spirit that cared about everyone’s opinion but his own. Growing up was hard…Verbal abuse…

    Im not gonna do a foxholer novella today but For all it’s worth, I’m still here, and you are too. I know there are ppl out there that don’t like me (you). Some will smile in my face with a glare in there eyes and I…

    Wait, I’m novelling again. 🙄

    Stay true to yourself and remember, NO ONE here, or anywhere is perfect & will never be but we all have that uniqueness that we bring to the table. That spark that makes us truly a spectacular person. That alone is enough to keep fighting for and to keep living for until our last breath parts from our bodies naturally….

    Im novelling again….😒

    Stay true to yourself.

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