i don’t wanna be a lost soul

as you know,
when i have a lot on my mind,
i don’t watch tv or listen to music.
my mind won’t allow me to focus on the show or the song.
one of my home-vixens,
divaa (as we will call her),
told me to watch a movie that will make sense to me.
she felt i’d relate to it heavy.
it was “soul” on disney+ and foxhole…

THAT MOVIE TRIGGERED ME SO BAD!!!!!
I CRIED FROM START TO FINISH!!

the movie is about a gentle-wolf named joe,
who when his life finally started to make sense,
he ends up dying (or a good coma).
in the afterworld,
he ends up trying to fight going to the great beyond.
he ends up finessing his way into mentoring a lost soul named 22.
the whole movie was about understanding what it means to have a life purpose.

it made me question if i’ve been a lost soul for quite some time.
sure,
i have the foxhole and a good life,
but i’ve been questioning what my purpose is.
the movie taught me that your purpose isn’t so much about career goals,
but the things you do in-between that.

What makes you truly happy?
What are the moments that make you feel alive?

you can all the money and success,
having sex with tons of people,
but have a meaningless life.
in a panoroma,
we can easily get sucked into feeling like we don’t have a purpose.
we use to live one way,
but we are forced to live another.
that movie has stuck with me since i watched it yesterday.
i don’t wanna be a lost soul.

Author: jamari fox

the fox invited to the blogging table.

2 thoughts on “i don’t wanna be a lost soul

  1. I watched this the day after Christmas and I thoroughly enjoyed it. It was a nice introspective on the whole thing about one’s living for their purpose vs just experiencing life. Some things can’t be explained, you have to actually experience them for yourself to do it justice.

    Spoilers if anyone cares
    Jamari, I took it as them saying it’s ok for you to not necessarily have a “life purpose”. That was 22’s journey, she never found what her purpose was, she ended up just enjoying the experience of living life and noticing the little things. And I liked the barber’s perspective and how he found pride and enjoyment in what he does even though it isn’t what his dream originally was. Some ppl will argue that it’s settling, but living your “dream” is not always like what you thought it would be and it shouldn’t consume your whole being.

    1. ^such an amazing breakdown aj.
      i absolutely agree and i loved how it touched on the black experience with the barber shop.

      that movie still sticks with me tbh.

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