maybe…

we are too much.
we aren’t enough.
we say the wrong things.
we shouldn’t have fought back.
we were never the right fit.
we have been the square in the circle.

all of those things can be true.
we are not robots either.
i think what hurts the most is when we can say/font,
without the possibility of a doubt,
that we did nothing wrong in a conflict.
we do live in a climate of:

blind leading the blind off the cliff like some lemmings

…and there are a lot of muthafuckas who KNOW we were in the right,
or that we were the victims,
but the chose to turn the blind eye while we suffered.
we got thrown in the fire because it was easier than accountability.
they watched as our reputations got tarnished and never called the person(s) out.

the people who know their friend,
partner,
or family member is wrong and doesn’t say anything.

they tell us to fight back,
stand our ground,
and don’t take no shit but my question is…

should you out someone who is part of the MAGA forest?

…especially if you have fucked them before?
i guess it can be a culture shock when you trained his hole to accommodate you…

…or you have ridden him like he is your fav ride at six flags,
but you see him promoting hatred and homophobia in public.
don lemon caused shock waves when he outed the alleged:

and i saw on reddit someone claiming to have outed a DL MAGA they fucked to their family.

the first comment sat with me:

“We don’t out people who are dealing with it internally,
we should out people who deal with it externally by hurting other people.”

outing anyone is a nuclear option but my question is…

we don’t realize other people are going through their own shit too.
i am so in my head about this housing shit,
i was brought back down to earth really quick.
now this doesn’t mean my issue isn’t stressful,
but when i talk/font to others,
i’ve been shown they are stressed TF out too.
one of my home vixens got to chatting last week.
i told her shit has been rough without going into too much detail.
so she responded that she….

“a story of low self esteem.”

that was on the first page.
i think it might have been a warning.
last week,
i decided to start reading to get my mind off “well, you know“.

the new movie “pillion” is based off a book called “box hill” by adam mars-jones.
the book follows colin who meets ray at a biker club called “box hill”.
it is based in the 70s,
but if this was current,
he would be considered an “the fantasy attentionisto” on socials.
so they meet when colin trips over ray at the club…

…and while on his knees,
he sucked ray’s dick at the club because,
well,
why not since he was already down there.

i’m not finished reading but colin annoys me because every other sentence is:

lately,
i’ve been listening to the “waiting to exhale” soundtrack.
i know.
that isn’t a good sign.
it has me thinking about bernadine’s storyline in the movie.

she was the faithful wife,
thinking she was going to have a night out with her husband,
when he tells her that he is leaving her for a white vixen.

right now,
i am bernadine but i’m past the shock phase.
that was saturday when i heard the test of my emergency broadcast system.
today…

…allegedly fonting,
of course.

so i randomly learned alexander skarsgård is best friends with jack mcbrayer,
who was on “kenneth” on “30 rock“.
i discovered this while not minding my business:

…and i thought it was really sweet tbh.
i love when i discover two people you’d never think are friends.

i made me realize the “friendships” with my polar opposites in my own life,
ones who we kept our friendships private,
they were either scared DLs or using me for my warmth.
Foxhole,
please be careful of these males only using you under the disguise of “friendship”.

while i was looking into more stuff about “pillion”,
which alexander stars in,
i learned he casually admitted recently that he allegedly dealt with other males before…