i’ll never forget someone telling me about people who perished in 9/11.
they said that many of those people probably don’t even know they have died,
so there spirits are stuck in a loop,
repeating that day over and over.
that is why there a heavy energy down there.
its literally an open graveyard.
who knows if we are walking by actual people or ghosts.
never forget.

when people say a house is haunted,
that means the spirit in the house hasn’t been released.
that is why i learned there is no reason to be scared of it/them.
we need to let it know its safe to move forward and be free.

follow me to where i’m leading with this.

earlier today,
i was talking with fancy and she mentioned negative self talk.
she said that its like…

i have a question for you:

are some males actually out of our league?
or is that the story we chose to tell ourselves in fear of rejection?

…until we meet someone who we think is “out of our league”,
and they show us that regardless of what we think we don’t have,
they are attracted to something we do have.
we been in our own bawdies for a long time so we know what works,
doesn’t work,
what we wish we had that would make things work,
and what has become “what we think makes us ugly“.
karaoke said something to me that i had to share with The Foxhole:

“people really need to start telling themselves a new story in their heads.”

i saw this thread on reddit and i wanted to share it on the Foxhole…

many people don’t know what kind of drunk they are.

happy drunk
flirty drunk
secret pop star performer drunk
hoe drunk
angry drunk
“may end up missing and never found again” drunk

…because sometimes,
you don’t realize who you are when you’re drunk:

until someone tells you the next day.

someone i know i first met completely out of control while drunk.
he was two parts friendly drunk,
but i peeped the one part angry drunk peaking out in moments.
he was so drunk,
he was making up shit and sounded really convincing while doing it.
the other night tho,
he got black out drunk and ended up…

i’m gonna font it:

many of The Foxhole are on point when they say these males are for sales.

…or even down for some fun but the reality is:

right place; right time
luck
trust
you can’t be a messy bitch and expect to be treated fairly

messy bitches get messy behavior.
lastly and those with this super power:

“i believe you won’t do anything to fuck up my life”

you have the “unassuming” energy that makes people comfortable.
i believe this is me,
which can be a gift and curse.
so yesterday,
i woke up but i didn’t have the best morning.
i had breakfast,
slept off and on,
and ended up having phone sex with an attentionisto…

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...and if this new meat turns out to be more,
and he isn’t a jackal or hyena in wolf fur,
i’m gonna let him fuck me because i reallllllllly need to get fucked.

whoops,
was that too bold?
welcome to my The Foxhole to those who are new.
so i met someone and the way he was looking at me…

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when we move from chaos to much safer ground,
for many of us,
it can leave us still in “fight or flight” mode.
we start scanning for danger when nothing is happening.
it can actually make you feel really fuckin’ nuts.
that is how i’ve been lately…