the person we think he is might be better when we jack off.
seriously.
the fantasy is always better than the reality with a majority of these males.
tbh,
i think this is where most of us get caught up
we see them in person or in public,
they go to our schools or work at our jobs,
and they look really fuckin’ good.
they start working out and you start seeing them in a new light.
we daydream because of how they look that they’ll…
treat us good
fuck us good
be good for us
…but in actuality,
it’s never what we imagine it to be.
that is the thing about the dangers of crushes and infatuations.
we put them on these high pedestals that we create in our minds.
every time we jack off to them,
we apply another stack to how good he might be to us.
we start getting butterflies over a false representation of who he is.
We need to be realistic
our minds will always create the best version of someone we like.
when we barely know someone,
all we can go off is the physical and other tiny glimpses in to their personality.
his physical appearance is really what we are attracted to.
handsome face
plump chest
big arms
his ass looks good in pants
sometimes,
he is a whole snack with many parts to feast on.
we heard that he is actually good in bed by someone who leaked his dick report.
We are really attracted to his physical shit
that’s where the problem starts.
all that lasts for so long until the honeymoon phase is over.
you see how some of these vixens regret fuckin’ some of these males after a while.
he isn’t intimated or shy that he doesn’t speak as much.
watch his behavior with vixens and you’ll see the true him.
more than likely,
he is straight.
if he happens to get down,
he might not be attracted to you.
chasing him only leads him running further away.
when we do have a chance moment,
we turn measly crumbs into a full course meal.
foxhole…
if he isn’t jumping through hoops to get our attention,
asks for our numbers,
or wants to chill alone…
CANCELLED
…and that’s okay.
there are plenty of other gay/bi males in the forests.
let’s try to shut down the fantasy and stop jackin off to the thought of him.
that only leads to more feelings and a harder time of letting go.
*something in my spirit led to write this.
it might have been for you or me.
Right On Time! Cuz he fine, light skin, and got this toned body and an a** that drives me crazy but he straight and we supposed to be besties. It’s been rough! I need d*ck that wants me! I had to mute his socials.
Mr. jamari! U r definitely psychic! But I’m not shocked u a cancer lol This is a word in due season and it spoke to my heart of hearts and I thank you for it!!
I am in the same space rn where I’m obsessing over a boy who has fed me crumbs as well and I turned that shit into a meal, creating a fantasy world that I know really and truly is not real. And what’s so annoying is all the time and energy I spend on thinking about this boy which in turn makes the crush burn hotter and harder to shake. Like sometimes I make up my mind that it’s done and I psych myself up to let it go and then he texts me or replies to a snap and just like that I’m back down the rabbit hole lol
What’s insane is it’s like the universe knows that we r being crazy that’s why it always seems like when u decide to let it go they miraculously appear and say/do something that pulls u in. Whenever u reach that point friends it’s just the universe testing u to c if u still a crazy ho. So say no to unrequited love and make space for what u really want to come into ur life.
I love you jamari Fox. You have no idea how much this blog has helped me and so many guys like us around the world. Your one true love is coming and trust me he will sweep u off ur feet and love u how u need to be loved- when u least expect it! You deserve it bro. Love you
^love you too and thank you for this amazing comment!!!
i had to stop myself from crying when i read it.
smh i’m such a cancer lol
As someone who is dealing with some crumbs from a pineapple @Jamarifox4president I felt your comment in my soul deep. It is like you wrote about my exact situation and how I try to get away from this person they always miraculously come back and I am back at square one starting this vicious cycle all over again. Damn I really do need to make space, that’s a great way to look at this situation because clearly these crumbs I am getting are never going to make me full.
Oh Jamari! I’m so glad you were lead to blog about this particular subject because just today I saw my crush who I have been crushing on for a while now presently he works at my local grocery store jamari when I tell you he’s so gorgeous and every time I see him he makes me smile on the inside and out at times really makes my day sometimes I just wish I could tell him that he makes me feel so good I think about him often even when I’m not trying to I think got I really bad for this man, and the truth is I can’t ever see myself expressing this to him because I have reservations about my looks and my insecurities get the best of me and I hate that feeling with a passion my infatuation for him just drives me crazy, but I can go on and on but thank you for your wisdom because I really needed someone from the outside to kinda snap me out of it.🤗
^ive been crushing on someone too,
but i’ve realized it’s been giving me anxiety.
the “idea” of what he might be doesn’t equal to who he is.
realistically,
he fed me crumbs.
i took those crumbs and tried to make a meal out of it.
i’ve come to realize that i’ve built the pedestal he sits on in my head.
he gotta go.
Oh Jamari! You hit on the head you expressed it so eloquently this is why I love you so much and you are truly a friend in my head and I just wanna cry because I do this same exact thing build this nigga up to be more than what he actually is.
^*hug* love ya too.
we gonna get through it.
just try to focus past his looks and see the bigger picture.
Thank you friend.🤗
Wow !!You put into words something I have never shared. There was this guy at work who I secretly loved . ( ” Its like you found my letters and read each one out loud” ). I prayed that you would finish ,but Jamari, you just kept right on…..
^maybe i was led to write that for you?
Exactly. Cancel, Delete, Reduce, Subtract, Do Not Enter, Find the Least Common Denominator, Detour, and Thanos Snap they asses immediately. It is not worth it. Our minds are powerful. So powerful, we give peasants inheritance to the kingdom of our hearts.
Not today, tomorrow, 2020 or beyond Satan…
^yessssssss!
i felt this.
i realized in my own silliness that i was giving power to a fantasy i’m quite sure won’t live up to my expectations.
fantasizing about him was making him more than he needed to be.