he was told the proper steps in cleaning himself out.
it was weird af to him that he had to shit his brains out before every sexual encounter.
unless a vixen was on her period,
he didn’t think it was this much of a hassle to have sex.
well you can’t have gay sex without making sure you are fully clean and an empty stomach.
those were the rules so he spent hours making sure the water after the enema was clear.

“If you shit on me,
that would not make me happy.” – was what was told to him.

well.
he never did it before so take a chill pill.
he doesn’t even have gay friends to show him the ropes either.
thank God he found a “before anal sex” guide on google.
before all of this,
he was homophobic af,
but he got approached with the opportunity of a lifetime…

a few months ago,
he was just a regular straight wolf with a huge social media following.
his career in his bio was that of “actor“,
but he never starred in any movies or tv shows.
he made some money on the side being a personal trainer,
but that was few and far in-between.
he simply used that title to get pussy since he looked good.
the only acting he has done was a few skits on his tik tok,
which has given him some notoriety.
taraji p. henson hearted of his skits he posted on ig.
outside of social media,
however,
he has no degree and a dead end job as a barista at “starbucks”.
after one of his videos went viral,
 “the gentleman” hit him up.
it started with likes after that,
then comments under every picture or work out video,
and compliments in dms.
at first,
he was all about that “no gay shit“.
it creeped him out that some random white man was sending him messages.
don’t get it twisted,
he has gotten dick pics and asshole shots in his dms before,
but this guy was persistent in getting noticed.
on this gentleman’s ig,
he didn’t have many pictures,
but it seems he was financially set.
he is on yachts,
showing off a vintage muscle car,
and at gathering with what looks like important people and celebs.

hmm.

now,
we are here.
the gentleman turned out to be a director.
they met up for dinner and it was pretty innocent.
the gentleman was working on a movie and thought he would be perfect for it.
it was a chance fro him to become a working actor.
the gentleman revealed he was gay and was attracted to him.
him told him he was flattered and didn’t mind.
it’s different when fags on social media are fawning for him and his bawdy.
this is a big director with a huge resume behind him.
one who dropped 500 on a meal and sent him home in a uber black.
he realized that if he fucks this up with this director,
there goes his chances on being anything in entertainment.
even though his insecurities started to kick in,
he had to do something.
that’s when the flirting happened in texts.
he wasn’t good at flirting with another male,
but he used the same charm he would use to get pussy.
it worked because the gentleman wanted to meet up with him again,
but this time,
he wanted to meet in his hotel room before he flew back to la in a few days.

he will never forget the pain he felt when the dick went up inside him.
he felt some kind of pleasure when his ass was getting eaten,
because he had a vixen do that to him before,
but now he is on all fours being mounted by a older white male in the doggy style position.
the gentleman understood it was his first time so he went slow at first,
but no amount of lube could prepare him for his asshole being pounded open.

Why does it feel like I have to take an enormous shit?

the gentleman took no mercy into taking his ass.
if he wanted the role,
he had to work that night for it.
every position he was put into didn’t help make it any better.
the only reason he was hard is because of the straight porn playing on the tv.
after a while,
he just separated himself from the act and let the gentleman have his way with him.
it ended up with cum all over his face and his dignity out the window.
he left the hotel room with a sore butt hole and so many thoughts going through his head.
what would his family think?
his family taught him being gay was wrong,
but he just did a gay act so does that mean he is going to hell?
what would the girl he was talking to think?
she couldn’t know he was just fucked just like he fucks her when they meet up.
what would his boys think?
they spent days clowning gay dudes just for being gay,
but here he is damn near screaming like a bitch for a role in a movie.

he ended up getting the role in the movie.
it did pretty well,
but he didn’t have a stand out role.
his performance got clowned the most because he isn’t really a good actor.
it’s a whole different ballgame being on a set than making a tik tok video in his living room.
the gentleman told him to move to hollywood so he can get his big break.
he thought all he had to do was fuck the gentleman that one time to get put on.
nope.
he didn’t realize he would be fucking a whole bunch of times so he can get put on.
on the rare occasion,
he would fuck a woman for a role.
since pussy was his specialty,
he would make sure he fucked her brains out so she could keep coming back for more.
a majority of the times,
he would have to fuck white males since they ran hollywood.
some of them were obsessed with bbc so he didn’t have to bend over too often.
he dreaded the times that he did tho.
he knows he isn’t a big talent so this is the only way until he gets on top.
so every director,
casting agent,
or whoever he meets,
he learned that his bargaining tool was sex.
his bawdy needs to be on point,
he has to be available,
and then he has to turn himself “off” when he is on his knees or on all fours.
as long as he gives a solid performance,
he can get whatever they offer him,
if they even offer him anything at all.
it sucks,
but this is what he signed up for.

it has lead him to hate himself.
this is not how he thought his life would end up.
drinking alcohol helps,
but he has become a shell of his former self.
sex doesn’t feel the same because it has become work.
he can’t keep a solid relationship because he doesn’t want any women to get close to him.
it has led him down a very lonely path.
often times,
when he is being fucked by someone who promises him big dreams,
he wonders what would have happened if he didn’t go this route.
he was still a damn near broke barista,
making silly tik tok videos,
and waiting for his big break to happen.
what would happened if he would have just ignored the gentleman?
i’m sure many who have been in the position have asked themselves this before.

Written by Jamari Fox (C) | 5/6/2020 | 8:30pm