one of my biggest fear in the past was being outed.
either for my sexuality,
or being interested in males who seemed interested in me.
i became a recluse out of fearof people and their thoughts of me.
i was carrying around such a heavy load of shame within myself. i was thinking about my fear of being turned on for liking “such and such”…
I always wondered about this. I could never do this, myself. Never say never, but it just isn’t my swagg. Even if I was with my Wolf, I could never see myself doing this…. I hope this doesn’t mean I’m a prude or anything…
So I told ya’ll I was @ a friend’s crib last night. Well we went out to mingle and came back to watch movies.
P.S = Working on Light Skinned that came over. Turns out he wasn’t messing/fuckin/or dating the mutual friend that brought him over. He kept slipping little looks on me here and there. He was my partner in cards and we wrecked these muthafuckas!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Daddy and I make a good team. He needs to make it official so I can stop pounding this love pavement.
Anyway, so we were posted up @ like 5 in the morning in the living room, watching a movie when I get an YIM out the blue from this dude I been chattin with. Nothing serious. Met him off the chat site and we exchanged our YIM information. He is serious D/L and I haven’t seen a picture but allegedly from him, he plays ball. Whatever.